After 20 years and many relationships, I feel like my first girlfriend was “the one.”
We were young but had a surprisingly deep and mature relationship for about 3 years. I’ve had 5 or 6 relationships since then, and it recently dawned on me that my first girlfriend actually ticks all the boxes the others didn’t.
We only “broke up” because she had to move far away. We tried to keep it long distance for a while but realized it wouldn’t work.
We briefly met a few times in the following years and we’ve always had this connection…like a look of ‘knowing’ that we each give the other.
There are also a handful of songs that, when I hear them, seem to transport me right back to a vivid memory of being with her.
Anyways, I am now single, not really motivated to date anymore, and have gone through bouts of extreme loneliness. I think there is a real possibility I might never start a family and end up dying alone.
She has three children and a husband she seems happily married to. We follow each other on social media which is how I know this.
We also check in with a few messages randomly every now and then. Even her sisters seem to be just how I remember them, and they have a great family that is fun, loving, smart, and attractive.
It hurts to know that ship has sailed. Just wanted to put these words out there, for some reason.
Netizens’ comments
Realistically she probably isn’t the same person you are remembering. People change and grow so she will have 20 years worth of change from who you remember. Her memory is probably rose tinted for you as well.
We can’t help but remember the good things and most of the time we don’t notice little changes to that memory. It’s one of the reasons eye witness accounts are so unreliable in court cases.
You believe the memory you have is reliable but your mind has been quietly adding or changing little details without you noticing and you think they have always been that way.