Long story short, I just graduated from a PhD program. My boyfriend of 5 years me multiple times that he was getting me a really special present to commemorate this event.
(He is also a PhD, and at the time of his graduation, his friends got him a very fancy watch.)
After my thesis defense, he gave me the gift, and it was very very cheap earrings. I know they were cheap because the gold metal color was peeling off and the earring backs were those little rubber things instead of metal backs.
Later, I looked up the earrings/brand and found that they were $20.
This really hurt my feelings as he had talked up this gift extensively, and we almost never exchange gifts with each other– only for birthdays– so I was looking forward to receiving whatever he got me. I’ve told him in the past that I am allergic to many metals in jewellery and usually only wear sterling silver or gold. I don’t really care about the price, but I felt the price tag should have told him the earrings were not really gold.
I calmly told him that I really appreciated the gift, but that my ears are very sensitive to some metals, and I wasn’t sure if I could wear these earrings. He understood that, and sort of offered to get me a different gift, but I got the feeling that he didn’t really want to do that.
I want to ask for a different gift because I would love to have something that I can use forever and remember this event. Am I to blame for doing that?