I 28F am currently pregnant and my baby girl will be here at the end of next month, I also have an 11-year-old. My mom lives in Malaysia and I’m not the only child.
I have a sister that lives in Malaysia that my mom lives in, we have different fathers so I have citizenship and when my parents split I chose to move to Singapore with my dad.
My relationship with my mom has always been rocky and about money, when I worked I helped her as much as I could to the point that if I had $5 left of my salary she would cry to me and ask me to send it to her because she needs it more(I’m a single mom).
My sister lives in Malaysia, I and my sister have gotten into fights about why I don’t send my mom money to the point that I told her how much I made, my bills and it didn’t change anything.
Fast forward I met my bf we were both working and I helped my mom out a lot. I got my mom a tv, new stove, a bed but then I got pregnant and I got really sick to the point that I would end up in the ER for dehydration and me and my bf made the decision to stay home during pregnancy and the first months of our new daughter life.
Since then my bf would be sending her money until I told him to stop because he is stressing out and we needed to buy everything for the baby, now every time I call she tells me how she doesn’t have money, or new clothes or anything ( I don’t get new clothes either🤦🏻♀️ so welcome to the club).
I was mentioning how my 11-year-old hot a growth spurt and she is trying to find her style and I have been buying her new clothes and winter clothes and how I have been struggling with money a bit but grateful that we will have everything set for when the new baby arrives,
she proceeded to tell me how she doesn’t have any clothes and that one of my aunts is going to visit in December and that I should send her clothes and stuff. I say down and I can’t afford it, my daughter’s camp is at the end of this month and I need to buy her some things and I went through my baby list and there is still a lot of things I need to get to be ready.
Would I be a bad person if I send her $60 and not send anything in December? I don’t go shopping or anything because I get dizzy and feel like I’m going to pass out all the time and I told my mom I plan on talking to my doctor about that in my next appointment.