My husband and I have been married for 6 years.
He works in sales and I am a SAHM for our 1 and 3 year old.
We have always pooled our wages and assets (when I was previously working and including any extra bonuses / gift cards, we got during that time).
My husband has recently made a sale where a $50K gift card accompanies it (half to be paid upfront and other half to come in a few years time once the property is completed).
My husband has recently gotten into watches and wants to buy an expensive watch for $18K.
My husband has said I could have the remaining amount of $7K of the first gift card and the remaining amount (second gift card of $25K) in a few years will all go into our savings. He believes he deserves more because he made the sale – however, I feel everything spent should be equal as being a SAHM (which he likes me being) does not come with those sorts of opportunities so there would be no way to ever get that kind of money.
The conversation has also upset me, making me feel like he does not see us as equals in our marriage.
Am I the wrong for wanting an equal amount out of the $50K and getting upset by this?
When I asked him about this he said I didn’t deserve an equal amount because I didn’t do anything for the sale and thought that I was being ungrateful for what I was being offered. Therefore he has now said he won’t buy the watch at all, so now I also won’t get any money from the bonus, instead, it will all go into savings (which he won’t let me use for anything personal – although he will not use it for any personal items either).
(Note: It’s not exactly the amount that I specifically needed because if the watch was only $5K, I’d also only ask for $5K too. I just feel hurt that he thinks he deserves of more it and how he’s handled the situation)
ust to clarify – I am happy and want my husband to get the watch he really like from the first gift card – I had just hoped for the extra amount to make it equal, to have come out of the second gift card in a few years time.
submitted by /u/Prior_Feature3993