My BF [M29] said he had a business trip and turned out to be a vacay with his female boss, and he thinks I’m [F27] overreacting
Long story short, last week my bf went on a business trip. I was aware of this since the beginning of the month, he said it was an important project etc.
He’s been there since Friday, but we got into a fight last night because he told me to call him and he said to do so later because he was listening to music getting ready, and when we called me he said they were going dinner and see the sunset after, and I asked who? And he said, “Emma (his boss) and I” and I was like ??? That sounds more like a date to me.
Things escalated to the point where he told me they were staying at the same suite together but separate rooms and later on texted him explaining while I felt upset but if they had unlimited budget for the trip why he didn’t pick s complete separate room
Turns out is because the job was cancelled but Emma wanted to go anyways and they went together, she paid for everything and said it was to celebrate his anniversary at his job. And they did minimal work . I suppose remote but it was to justify the expenses At this point I was infuriated
He said it was more a vacay than a work trip but he didn’t know until they were about to leave…
And I told him that was trip was like a sugar Momma pays for everything kind of trip because that’s exactly what happened and he knew and went along with it and never said anything about it .
I’m upset, hurt and so pissed I want to break up because now every single time he goes on a trip with her I’m gonna be overthinking and that’s not a way of living for me.
He’s just saying like wtf I do respect you , she’s just my boss but I think I’m on the whole reason to be mad here. He comes back tomorrow
EDIT: on how the problem developed since this morning
I want to give more context. This is a family business. These people are old money. The owners are Emma’s parents. They’re kinda old people and she’s maybe 40 something. I’ve met all of them twice .The owners have asked me before along with him to go on a small trip so I never felt bad vibes coming from none of them neither from Emma. So when some people tell me to tell HR I don’t know how that would really change anything since the owners are literally her parents and they knew they went there.
I was aware of this trip as the other one they made a few weeks ago but he withheld a lot of info about things that changed regarding the trip and the project they were gonna do I was completely unaware of. Which indeed turn into more of a vacation.
I blocked him on literally everything and told him to get his keys and stuff with his neighbor he then called me from another number later on today and trying to explain himself. He did admit that it was inappropriate doing so but he didn’t think anything about it since he and Emma and the family are friends. He asked me to make it right but I told him but he broke my trust and I couldn’t keep living thinking and not trusting him every single time now when she travels with her.
he told me he would be willing to tell the owners that for future travels not to go with her or only male coworkers or even bring me with him to make it right and told me that if he was in my shoes he woulda felt weird out about me going with another men on a trip.
I haven’t changed my mind about the break up. I told him that was a break up for me and what he said didn’t change a thing. I have had toxic relationship in the past and sometimes when you forgive and give second chances only opens the door for more disrespect in the future.