It’s been slightly more than 2 years since I got together with my boyfriend. I’m 24f and he’s 26m, and we both met through uni CCA and became close friends before gotten together.
He loves me very much, he rarely throws tantrum or lashes out at me even when he’s in a very bad mood. He would buy me gifts and my favourite food/drinks and snacks without me asking for it. Not only that, he never forgets our monthsary, anniversary, my family members’ birthday, and always tries his best to turn up to our family gathering during special occasions.
Besides that, he would make time for me whenever I need his help, like discussing my job application, my studies, my issues at work and with my colleagues, and so on. I would say he’s pretty much almost perfect in every sense.
I also never question his loyalty coz he’s an introvert who doesn’t know how to communicate with girls, and he always take pictures and videos of what he’s doing, plus we have calls every night as well. I mean trust is important in relationship, and so far I never see any red lights or anything that triggers my lack of trust in him.
However a few weeks ago I discovered that he has this habit of saving pictures of girls, like these girls can be his friends, my friends, acquaintances, colleagues, influencers, celebrities.
When I confronted him about it, his explanation was, it’s just my desire to please myself whenever I’m alone but I have no feelings for them and no intention to hit on any of them.
My trust in that moment was 50-50 when he told me that, but when he showed me the conversation with those friends, they indeed very seldom talk, and most of the conversations were months ago and the way he replied didn’t seem like he’s flirting or talking dirty at all, so I forced myself to trust him.
I didn’t force him to do anything about it coz my female friends used to tell me that it’s better for guys to DIY themselves rather than cheating with other women. He seemed very calm about it during the confrontation, so I guess he thinks it’s a norm among guys. Honestly I have no idea if other guys share this habit of saving “hot” pictures, and I supposed there are fetish that is much worse than my boyfriend’s.
Does this say anything about my boyfriend? Is it a norm among guys? I know everyone is different in terms of ways of satisfying their lust, and I should accept and respect my boyfriend’s too due to mutual respect and since he’s always been so nice to me. Yes I still do feel uncomfortable about it cos even my exes who cheated on me didn’t do such thing.