I’m 14 and I live with my dad and stepmom. My mom passed when I was 5, and my dad and stepmom got together when I was 9, and they got me to move in with my grandma. 2 years ago my grandma had a stroke, and she had to go to a nursing home so I moved in with my dad and stepmom.

Ever since my dad and stepmom got together I couldn’t spend time with just my dad, my stepmom had to come too. I always got the vibe she didn’t really like me so I had no idea why she always wanted to hang out with me. It made hanging out with my dad really awkward.

When I moved back in with them it got worse cos every time we were having a conversation she’d come in like “what are we talking about?” and just join in the conversation even if it had nothing to do with her. If she could she would stand or sit in between us too.

I mentioned it to my dad a couple times and he said he never noticed and he doesn’t think it’s true that it’s every time, he was like “it’s her house too, she can hang out with us if she wants.” I don’t think it was getting through to him that it was every time and it was weirding me out.

So next time she did it I was like “hey why do you always come in and join every conversation I have with my dad and stand between us?” and she laughed and said “oh I’m just a bit of a jealous person” and when I asked what she meant she was like “I get jealous when my husband spends time with other girls.”

I told her that was really weird and I’m not another girl, I’m his daughter. My dad and stepmom keep insisting it was a joke but it really creeped me out and I can’t help but take it seriously. I asked her to stop butting into our conversations and she was like “oh so I need your permission to talk to my own husband in my own home?” which is definitely not what I was saying at all.

Now my stepmom is acting all hurt and upset and my dad wants me to apologize for hurting her feelings. He says I deliberately overreacted to her joke just because I don’t like her and I was taking any excuse to be mean to her and exclude her. But I really feel like it was a weird joke to make even if she didn’t 100% mean it like that, and I think I have the right to be weirded out by it, plus I think I have the right to ask to spend some time just with my dad and it doesn’t mean I’m trying to exclude her.

I’m 30 and live with my husband and three children (m8/ f5 / and m2). I work as a freelance artist from home and my husband works long hours driving. As a result, I do the majority of housework and look after our three children. Though when he’s off work and home, he takes on his fair share. Our lives mean that we don’t have much free time.

I enjoy cooking and as a mum, I make sure to give my children a wide variety of foods to eat. I want them to appreciate different cultures, flavours and different types of cuisine from all around the world, and to grow up kind and respectful of others, so a few days a week, (3 out of 7 )my children and I cook together and make a recipe from another country. We all enjoy this and it gives a perfect segue into learning about a foreign country.

My husband on the other hand has a more plain palette and prefers simple dishes that he grew up with, such as fish and chips, bbq chicken etc. We eat plenty of meals like this too.

A week ago, we hired a babysitter and went to a friend’s house for dinner. (All Covid tested and negative) They cooked a beautiful vegetarian pie, with mashed potatoes and vegetables.My husband turned to them and said “Oh god, finally! A decent meal for once! My wife is always cooking these awful smelly dishes.”

Hurt, I looked at my husband and asked him what he meant, and he said that ” he only puts up with it, because he doesn’t have time to cook something decent for himself”.

The meal was a little awkward after that, but neither of us brought it up again while there, until we came home. I told him that I “wouldn’t stop cooking foreign food with the kids and if he didn’t like it, he would have to cook something for himself.” He once again said that ” he didn’t have time for that, and I should just cook him something he likes at the same time, ” which I refuse to do, mainly because when he comes home after work he spends all his time, up until bedtime, gaming (this is around 4 / 4 1/2 hours of time after he comes in.) and has plenty of time to cook a quick, but decent meal for himself and enjoy his hobby.

Once again this week, I cooked with my kids and like I told my husband, I didn’t leave him any. He was pissed, but ordered take out. The second time he went around to his parents house and his mum cooked for him. The next day, I got a phone call from my mother in laaw saying I was ” a bad wife for not cooking for my husband, and that I spent all day doing my hobby (my actual job) and why shouldn’t he enjoy his hobby? ” Which again, he still can and does do. I also still cook for him on the days I’m not cooking anything foreign.

So am I in the wrong? He need to bring his mother out to settle small things like this. I think i married a child.

So my GF and I have dated for just barely 3 years. She has met my immediate family and but she has never met my extended family.

So we have a tradition where once a month my grandmother hosts a Sunday dinner for the entire family at her home. We all show up and if you’re old enough to use a stove you cook.

My girlfriend has never attended until very recently, the first time she did was in December prior to Christmas. This is because my grandmother would prefer to not have non family and partners that haven’t been around for a while present.

When she attended in December, I got word that my grandmother didn’t approve of her choice of clothing and won’t welcome her back if she doesn’t dress better. My aunt told me that grandma thought she dressed, “whorish”. Now I fully disagree and so did my family and my aunt. My girlfriend was admittedly dressed slightly less conservative than the other women but I wouldn’t call what she was wearing immodest at all.

So I told my girlfriend and asked her if she would dress more conservatively next time. So come January the dinner is this Sunday. I wanted to not have a repeat of what happened last time as I want her to get FaceTime with my family.

I asked my girlfriend to show me her dress before this weekends. She did and the dress was less conservative. Again, it wasn’t immodest, but just less conservative and I know it’d piss my grandmother off again. She said no as she really liked the dress and it was modest. I told her that what’s modest to her isn’t going to be what’s modest to a 89-year-old woman. I told her if she wanted to buy a dress I’d pay for it.

She refused. After some arguing, she proved that she was not going to budge. I told her that I’d she didn’t change it would be better if she just not show up and we try to find a solution for next month. She then said she wasn’t getting a different dress and I told her that it’s best she not come and I’d go without her.

She told me I was being unreasonable and putting an old woman’s outdated views over her freedom. I feel like I was being very reasonable.

There is this saying, both sides of my palm is my flesh. whichever side i got pinched is gonna hurt.

What should I do?

Back then I believed in true love but I started to see the comfort of another woman, they have boyfriends to chauffeur them around and I’m taking bus and MRT with my boyfriend.

Soon I got a bf with a car, but it was an old broken piece of junk he calls it a “car”. It was so noisy and the aircon was never cold. I ended it with him because I did not feel comfortable. I needed some more atas car to fit me.

So, I’m a gold digger. But not the way you’re thinking about it, I’m a pro. I check the newspapers for financial transactions, then “bump into” someone who’s just made a lot of money and ask them out, that’s how I met my current husband, but he was a player for most of his life so he genuinely thought i was into him (or so i thought at the time).

he implied that he was exhausted from the drama and just wanted a homely girl to be the mother of his children, so i played the part and kept up the charade as we were dating, and then as we got engaged, then married.

Unlike a lot of professional gold diggers, my final goal wasn’t some doormat workaholic husband who will fund a lifestyle of luxury for me as he toiled endlessly while I swiped his credit cards all day. I just wanted to live an upper middle-class lifestyle as a stay at home mom, i genuinely wanted kids, and wanted to be the best mom i could.

But slowly i found myself falling in love with my husband. I lived a pretty brutal life and developed somewhat sociopathic tendencies as a result like being able to use people without feeling guilty and not caring about people, but one day as i woke up next to him and thought about how i would be really broken if he died, or left me somehow i realized my feelings for him were genuine, i felt bad about manipulating him, and after a few weeks i gathered up the courage and told him everything, how I’m a gold digger who wanted him for his money, and how i played a part the whole time so he would marry me, but to my surprise he just laughed it off and went on with what he was doing

He told me he knew all along, and how he was already cynical about relationships and “understood” that whoever he married wouldn’t be 100 percent genuine and that’s just “something you have to deal with” I’m partly relieved that he’s not gonna divorce me, but I’m also bummed out, it’s totally reasonable to not trust me because of what i did, but it’s a bit too much to not trust anyone. Is there any way i can show him that I’m genuinely into him now, and invested in the relationship?

A young man shared his encounters with a woman that is much older than him.

Here is the story:

Hi I’m 21(M) and I was matched with a 44(F) in the dating app and I was there for fun. So we met up after a few chats.

3 months later I went to her place and I spent a night with her. I’m surprised she is so good in bed.I thought women at her age passed childbearing, so I dared to do it. Now I regretted it because she told me she was pregnant a month plus later. I suggested her to go for an abortion because I am not ready to start a family, and since she is older than me, she should be able to pay for the abortion.

She got angry with me and stopped contacting me thereafter.

I got to know a few days ago she didn’t go for an abortion, and she is pregnant with my twins. What shall I do? To get back in touch with her again? I still not ready to start a family, especially with a woman much older than me.

Here is what netizens think:

• Nicely done. U had your fun and then U decided to walk away and let her handle the abortion fees.U are 21, U are too young to start a family. I can already see your future going down the drain.I believe the logical thing to do is not to get married, but be there for the twins when they are born. No one says you have to be a husband, but U definitely need to fulfill the role of a father to provide.Lastly, there are other holes to upload your shit if U really dun want to be a father. Please exercise some self control, it’s becoz of people like U that some kids will grow up unhappy and become rebellious.

So you did it with someone old enough to be your mother, and because of you she’s going to be mother to a pair of twins young enough to be her grandchildren…

• Boy,one moment of shiok dong dong give u life time of seow ding dong.You will live with the stigma forever in your life

• If I’m you, I will get back with her cos I will not have to worry about her getting pregnant during her pregnancy period.

• She can sue you for child support and you will be financially impoverished for the next 21 years! And at 44, she is at risk of pregnancy complication or giving birth to baby with special needs.

What car to get

Company is giving me 1.2k per month car allowance. Should I go get sth new and a higher end car such as a Tesla, Merc or BMW?

I’ll be changing jobs soon to one which need me to travel frequently around the island to meet customers.

Currently do not own a car and will need to get one due to the job nature. Some people have advised me to just be prudent and get a 2nd hand jap/ Korean car.

I’m thinking firstly to get sth reliable and comfortable since I’ll be on the road often. Sure I’ll need to use more than 50% of my savings to get a better car but since I’m only young once and it’s my first car, I hoping to get sth impressive to enjoy too.

My background-26M, working for a year since grad and no other big commitments like house or marriage anytime soon. Guys, what do you think?

Netizens’ comments

1. Go and read up and research on car ownership before you buy. 1.2k won’t even cover the instalment on a real high end car. Not forgetting insurance, for first time car owner, insurance is expensive. Then road tax 400 and above, and fuel depending on your engine capacity, easily above 100. Then season parking leh?
   If I were you, unless I need to drive my customer around, which I suspect you don’t else company should have assign you a high end car to drive, I won’t even buy a car. I’ll just grab/gojek/taxi everywhere and still have a comfortable sum left. No need to headache so much, got pple drive me, no need to worry about parking also.
   And car is a depreciating asset. And as a first time car owner I won’t even buy a new car. Definitely get a second hand one if die die need one in decent condition, so if scratch or dent not so heart pain.
2. what kind of decent car can you get with 1.2k only? lol unless you’re planning to top up quite a bit.
   not to mention the upfront cost assuming a decent car ( assuming the cheapest bmw 1 series is about 160k, means you need to fork out about 65k upfront.) and about 1800 per month instalment
3. Take MRT and where it takes too long use grab. 1.2k will do the job easily and you don’t have to maintain a car. Less is more.

Any advice on changing friendship to relationship

Hi all, 5 years ago when I was at my 20s I had 2 really close guy friends who used to chase me, 1 was really handsome with a decent personality while the other was a little uglier but has a really bubbly and gentle personality

Ultimately I fell into a relationship with the handsome one and just kept the other guy in the friendzone. Fast forward till today, my BF of 5 years recently dumped me for another girl and the other guy is currently still going strong in his relationship.

I didn’t forge any friendships with any other guys because I was fully loyal in the relationship and I don’t find it appropriate.

I know I was being superficial about looks in the past but I’ve changed alot since then, is there any way I can win him back?

Netizens’ comments

1. It’s your turn in the friendzone.
2. Send me your pic and see if we can talk.
3. Well ure alone now n the guys are in a relationship. Time for you to find someone else other than him
4. Pls dun be the third party in his relationship.
5. You should screw yourself now you deserve it
6. He’s already in a relationship of his own. Don’t go breaking people up for your own selfishness. Grow up.
7. It’s too late la. Treat it as you met the right person at the wrong timing. Ppl happy in rs leh. Don’t go break the couple up leh.
8. You deserve it, go and do some reflection. Now is your turn to see him love someone else.
9. People you find ugly can still cheat, have bad personalities…etc. Doesn’t mean if you’d chosen friend B you both will work out.
10. Please spare the ugly but innocent guy. He deserves better, and you are not it.

Married and Single Workers

I’m getting fed up with the attitude of the married workers. They disappear from work as and when they like and make the single non-married workers do their work.

As much as we express compassion towards those who are married and try to understand their difficulties of extra household burden.

There sometimes have to be a line drawn and not taking the singles and use them for granted.

These are the black sheep who are making employer be cautious towards hiring married staff and putting the hardworking people’s potential job opportunities at stake.

Tell your boss and it appears you are selfish. Don’t tell your boss and you have to tank the laziness of the married workers.

Netizens’ comments

1. Wow. A new form of discrimination
2. Your last statement says it all. You want change but you don’t dare to highlight the issue
   You don’t dare = You don’t deserve it
   Simple rules of life. Stop hiding and open your golden mouth.
3. u can suan them indirectly that they are using married as excuse, without insulting the actual person. like “imaginary spouse”, “right/left hand” etc
4. You are immature. You assume you will never need the help of a co-worker if you need to take time off to take care of your parents etc etc. A work place which supports the workers who genuinely need to take care of their family etc is a good workplace and you should treasure it! Wait till you work in a ‘sweat shop’ which treats you like dirt, then you will know the meaning of “fed up”.
5. My boss thinks otherwise though. S/He prefers married employees, and best if they have a kid min. because they won’t job-hop as much as single employees as they prefers job stability and are too busy to be looking out.