I haven’t had sex with my wife in over five years, and I don’t miss it with her.

Sex with my wife has been hit or miss since my son was born 32 years ago. As time went on, she became more focused on herself getting off and much less on it being a pleasurable experience for both of us. I was good at getting her off several times during each encounter and I’d be lucky to get off once in a great while.

About eight or nine years ago, she decided that showering daily wasn’t for her as it dried her skin out. This is in spite of using moisturizing soaps and lotions. She went to showering once a week. We’re both overweight and prone to getting sweaty while doing stuff around the house. Me, I shower every morning and later in the day if I’ve been doing yard work, etc.

Needless to say, she doesn’t smell or taste so good any more. She claims washing up at the sink is perfectly good and as effective as a shower. She’s also prone to weird rashes on her body that started a few months after the weekly only showers. When I’ve suggested it may be due to once a week showers, she says that’s not the cause and goes to the general practice doctor for prescription ointments to clear it up. I suspect she doesn’t tell her doctor she showers only once a week.

She developed chronic indigestion due to a hernia and not following some dietary suggestions to minimize the indigestion and gas. She burps a lot and doesn’t try to suppress it or at least muffle the sound. That means she’d loudly belch in my face when kissing and other things. Between the noise and smell, eww.

Over Time, I lost interest in intimacy with her. Between the lack of bathing, interest in only her pleasure and now her chronic belching it killed my interest.

I still love her, but don’t want to sleep with her anymore. I still get urges, but take matters in my own hands so to speak. And I’ll freely admit I wouldn’t mind having a friend with benefits, but am not actively seeking that out.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

A netizen shared how he is a 22-year-old V and has never kissed a girl before, he added that he has only ever been on 1 date in his life and feels sad and jealous.

Here is the story:

“I am a 22-year-old guy. I have never had intercourse. Actually, I have never even kissed a girl before. I have only ever been on 1 date in my life.

And honestly, I feel really sad because of this. Whenever I think about this, I am always reminded that I am the guy that has never been worth kissing or dating.

This is not even because I am conservative. I am actually very liberal. I am up for anything. It isn’t even due to a lack of trying. I am on 4 dating apps and honestly, it’s exhausting.

I barely get any matches and most people I talk to don’t even proceed beyond a few messages. I usually just get ghosted. IDK what I am doing wrong.

My only romantic experience was a girlfriend I had for 6 months 5 years ago. She told me she was conservative and therefore wasn’t comfortable sleeping with me. But she cheated on me by sleeping with one of my friends while we were together. So clearly she was uncomfortable about me and not the activity itself.

Wants to feel loved

I have a lot of close female friends with whom I have very platonic relationships. But I really crave something more. I really crave intimacy. It’s not just intercourse but just to feel loved, feel cared for, to feel like someone in this world actually gives a shit about what happens to me.

I want some level of exclusivity in my relationships. I also want to have intercourse with someone I love and someone who loves me and to feel that connection.

I want something more than just friendship. When I see other people in happy relationships, it makes me sad, jealous, and envious.

I am very sad because of this and IDK what to do. I have been told to just focus on improving myself and that I will find a girlfriend when it is time but that is clearly bullshit advice because nothing good seems to be happening.

Am I really that unappealing? I feel so lost.”

Editor’s note: You are only 22, your time will come.

When I first saw her, I knew she was the one. I’m not one who believe in love at first sight but seeing her had changed my mind. I had been admiring her from afar for ages.

Fate was on my side. I was transferred to her class. My class number exceeded thus I was the lucky one to switch over. She was friendly and the first person to say hi to me. I don’t know how many times my heart skipped a beat whenever I saw her.

I realised she got a bf in school. I tried to convince myself to give up. As our friendship grew I find myself increasingly attracted to her. She’s funny, cheerful, kind, beautiful inside and out. I’ve never met anyone like her. Before I know it myself, I was smitten. Actually we have become good friends. We text each other about homework and stuff. I think she has a great personality. She’s very smart and confident. She also know how to play the drums which I think is so cool. I was afraid that she would notice I’m crushing her hard so I start to distant myself a little.

I think it was meant to be. One day when I was out I saw her bf with a different girl. They held hands and acted like a couple so I don’t think its platonic. I secretly snapped a few photos.

Now I’m in a dilemma. Do I tell and show her what I saw? Or should I continue to pray that her relationship with her bf will die a natural death?

Actually under normal circumstances, if I saw something like this, I wouldn’t tell.

Here are what netizens think:

• It’s not “the one” if it’s not reciprocal and she shows zero interest beyond basic friendly gestures.And unlike what many people here think, you can’t “engineer” attraction through any mechanism because she clearly did not show any in the first place.Wishful thinking is bad for you. You let your misplaced emotions cloud your judgement. Boost your testosterone and such mistakes won’t happen again.

• The guy is cheating on her with some other girl, as her friend I think you should just let her know. What happen to you two after that, whether you be together or not, leave it to fate ba.

• U have to know, even if u break the 2 of them up, she might be yours to begin with.

• I would show her the picture, as a good friend. No one deserves to get cheated. But do not expect her to fall for you just because of that.

I emotionally cheated on my GF twice in 6 years. Who’s problem is this?

My GF and I were classmates in Poly and we got together back then. Due to my sleazy past, I had an inferiority complex that I was not good enough for her at the start. She made it very clear about this point but I loved her very much nonetheless. I went above and beyond to make up for my lack of confidence and pampered her. Over time, she simply took me for granted.

At the 2 years mark, I met my colleague, A. She was very nice to me, bought me breakfast every morning, cared for me when I was burnt out and we had a strong connection. We talked a lot at work naturally and our co-workers often urged us to get together. We had so much chemistry, and she confessed to me. If I said that I did not have feelings for A, I would have been lying. To close this chapter, I tendered my resignation and left as I cannot stand the fact of losing my GF whom I loved dearly. However, it was for a fact that at some point of time, someone else was slowly replacing her place in my heart.

It was also at the same job, I met B. The moment B walked into the room on her first day, A said that she was definitely going to be the one for me. B was our team’s temporary staff and I did not think much of our relationship back then. A was constantly jealous whenever I approached B for work so I kept my distance from her. At same point, my GF did pick up that something was amiss and checked my phone while I was in the showers. However, she had never confronted me and we left this matter as it is.

In my subsequent job, 3 years later, I met B again and we are from different teams. We had no reasons to communicate at work but we met on the way home and started talking about our first job together. Slowly, we went for lunch together once a month and somehow started texting each other outside of work. Our conversations are always filled with laughter. As a devoted Christian, she will not be able to accept my scandalous past and lack of virginity. So I always tried to keep a distance from her but we somehow had to work together on a project. And here I made a choice to leave my current workplace again as I cannot resist the pull towards B.

Throughout this whole time, my GF was often not understanding of my busy work schedule and was constantly making demands. I wanted to marry her 3 years ago but we could not get a BTO and she was not ready for a resale flat. Now that she is eager to get married but me, not so much. I am not blaming her and in fact, she is an amazing girlfriend. It’s just that I do not know how to effectively communicate with her. When discussing tough topics, she often have no opinions so there is not much of any discussion in our relationship.

If I really loved her that much, would A and B have the chance to catch my attention? Probably not. If my GF paid more attention to me, would A and B have the chance to catch my attention? Probably not. Should I break up with my GF and lose the stability that we have now?

Anyone else thought about how different life would be without a university cert?

At about 30, all my university friends are employees working for MNCs, with the exception of 1 working for his dad’s company and another in a startup.

Recently I met up with my secondary school friends who didn’t go to university and I realise they’re very successful too. I’m immensely happy for them. More than half of them have their own non-tech businesses which aren’t inherited from their parents. For example: f&b, renovation, recruiting, advertising, ac repair, motor workshops.

As much as I am happy that they are doing well, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t envious of them. While my uni friends and I are talking about whether to get a resale 4 or 5 room, most of my secondary school friends have outright bought condos/landed properties already.

What I realise is that my secondary school friends worked for SMEs for a couple of years to learn the trade before starting up their own business. Now, if I were to try to replicate this, I’d need to start a petrol company, which is absurd. Yes I work in Jurong Island.

I’m not complaining that I have chosen this path, but sometimes I really wonder how things could be if I didn’t go to university for an engineering course.

Here are what netizens think:

• Starting a biz isn’t exclusive for non uni grad….And which law says you can only start a biz of your trade?Don’t be envious because you don’t know what they have to go through to make it to the top. And maybe if you learn how they got there, you will be glad you chose the right path.

• That’s your pasar though. There are many equally successful university graduates and many equally unsuccessful non-university graduates. Your life is what you make of it.

• Yours is a common fallacy. With this kind of thinking, you are better off as an employee. Thinking like that will only bring regret and misery, but it would take a herculean effort to switch your thinking around. The education system is still acting like the world of the 1960s, while “looking” futuristic, so don’t feel bad – the programming runs deep.

A netizen shared how he has a friend who is obsessed with him and copying everything he does and “stealing his identity”.

Here is the story:

“Hi all. Need some advice regarding a friend who is obsessed with me. Let’s call him A.

Been close friends with A for a really long time. However, A is starting to creep me out by copying every little thing I do, from the words I use in my speech to my personality (he originally had a personality that is a complete opposite from mine). He also pretends to like my hobbies and behaves like me.

This is getting disturbing. Feels like A is stealing my identity. Have brought this up to A before but it is still happening. Would love to continue this friendship. What would you guys do??”

He is romantically interested in me? We are both guys.

Editor’s note: I think he likes you more than a friend.