it’s not that people don’t want kids, it’s so hard to afford.

My Bto has been delayed from last year September till this year (April to June). Recently, we were told that it will be June end or July and this delay has caused so much problems.

My wife and I have been renting a room for the last two years. She is currently pregnant and we had hope the house will be in time for her to do confinement. But nope, H D B is not able to confirm the date nor provide any help.

My inlaws and parents have no spare rooms. We are now looking at a confinement center after birth that cost anywhere between 16-20k for 28 days…

We are also in the midst of getting an ID for our 4 room. Some IDs have told us straight that 50k is too little. That’s excluding furniture and appliances lol…

We finally found one within the 50k mark and are trying to get affordable but quality appliances but not going to be cheap.

Next we are going to queue for infant care at my workplace because my parents are too old and coe is higher than my annual income. It will cost around 1.6k a month excluding diapers and milkpower etc. We still have to buy insurance etc etc.

That’s not counting the monthly allowance we give our parents, some of their groceries and utilities.

Im literally packing food to work everyday since last January. I don’t know where else I can save money from and the share market wiped a significant chunk of my savings. Sigh.

Rant over. Sucking it up and going to work tomorrow. Stay strong fellow Singaporeans. Life hard.

Netizens’ comments

It is tough for any class but the rich, wages have not kept pace at all with the situation.

I lost my job last when my wife was in 2nd month of pregnancy with twins. Started in July and only found a job in March, close to 9 months.

Exhausted almost all savings, never sought any help, was stubborn on that.

The main expenses are going to be Diapers Milk powder

Luckily the kids were not fussy about the brand of milk so I tried the expensive one to the Malaysian version than settled on S26 as a good compromise.

Diapers just try variety no need to over stock as your baby will grow very quickly.

Essential is a hot water filter dispensing machine, u don’t want to muck around at night trying to boil water etc.

Old boss called to complain about new job “poaching” me as a new employee

I was offered a job on the spot recently without actually looking for another job, and after discussing with my now new employer about my credentials and what I could provide them, they offered me nearly double the yearly income as what I was previously getting paid. So of course I took the offer.

Put in my 2 weeks trying to be professional. Old boss asked where I was going and I made the mistake of telling him.

So what’s he do? He calls them to complain about them poaching me from his company. it’s a company in a totally different field of work.

So rather than try to match my offer to keep me, he tried to ruin my chances of moving on to something better by calling and complaining that they are putting his company in a bad position with my leaving.

Netizens’ comments

1. Clearly you made the right call. Old boss seems equal parts petty and stupid. Unless old boss is a client of new boss (and a major one), new boss either won’t care or might even be impressed that he obviously picked someone valuable.
   Are you still in your 2-week notice period? If you are, and your old boss is still giving you crap, bear in mind you don’t legally have to stay. Giving notice is a courtesy, and courtesy is something one extends to good people.
2. Your boss sounds like a whiny little girl. Glad you’re getting out of there and to somewhere that pays you right.
3. This is great for you. Old Boss just told your new employer that you’re invaluable and your loss is causing him stress.
4. I had that happen to me ages ago, in relatively close circumstances to yours. My then-new boss won my loyalty by checking in with legal, who immediately laughed about it and told me to ignore the noise.
   I don’t like talking about people like they’re things but I think it makes my point better: If your new place is worth sticking around, they’re not gonna throw away a new investment, they’ll have your back.
5. Sounds like it’s time to tell the rest of the employees of the compensation and perks at the new place.
6. if that were me the two weeks would have ended the second i found out he called my new employer. no reason for me to act like a professional when old boss is acting like an a-hole

After only a month, I deeply regret quitting my job and I’m embarrassed

As the title suggests. I quit my job a month ago because I gave in to a very stupid reason for putting in my two weeks. I won’t get into that reason but I left with zero jobs lined up and severely regret it.

I haven’t slept well, I’ve been over eating, and generally doing nothing besides putting in applications and having anxiety over the regret.

I loved my job, I loved the people I worked with, and this whole decision was idiotic of me.

It’s too soon to call my job back but either way I feel like I am going to look so dumb if they let me back on after only a month of being gone.

People have been gone for that amount of time before at my work but it was never because of resigning, it was always due to emergencies.

I know everyone, at the end of the day, would appreciate me being back over me being gone because I was dependable enough but I just cannot shake the shame over how soon it is.

If I wanted to come back so soon I should’ve just taken a vacation instead of wiping all my credentials.

I’m not the only person in the universe who’s left a job just to call back for a potential re-hire but I have so much general embarrassment just as a person that I feel like my coworkers will hate me over the fact that I literally shouldn’t have quit if I was going to just come back after a month.

It’s been the longest month of my life and I’m not a person who should be unemployed at all.

I’m going to bite my shame by the 15th of April and call to see if they’ll hire me again. I’ve already decided on that but I cannot believe I did this to myself at all.

There’s 8 billion people on this planet and I keep reminding myself I’m not the only one who’s pulled this but I still feel alone.

Netizens’ comments

1. When I was younger I once just stopped going to work. Didn’t tell anyone why, I didn’t even call to quit. I just stopped going. I really liked the job too, and I didn’t then see my actions for the irrational mess they were.
   The embarrassment you feel now might be nothing compared to the eventually self loathing you develop towards yourself for things like this. You made a mistake and you know the why of it all, forgive yourself for being human and use every mistake as a learning experience. Knowing what not to do is just as important as what to do.
   • (OP) You’re right. That’s why I’m just going to be embarrassed and swallow my pride regardless once a little more time passes I don’t want to end up in the self loathing portion of this when I can just make the call.

“Oops, we paid you too much, please pay us $86.”

My wife was let go from her job just before Christmas.

Today, the final week in March, she gets a letter from the employer stating they incorrectly paid her too much and want their $86 and change back.

Choices on the letter are to take it out of the next paycheck or xx per month over the next several paychecks.

My initial inclination is to trash the letter and pretend we never got it. It wasn’t sent by certified mail and they can try and do whatever payroll deduction they want, she hasn’t worked there for three months.

Stated reason was incorrect timecard entry, but that’s not her fault, HR entered the timecards and frequently did it incorrectly.

What do you think? We aren’t sweating $86, but it seems petty to go after someone three months after you already cut them a final check.

Edit Reading the letter they sent again, the pay period they are referencing was one month and one week AFTER she was let go.

It’s not possible for her to have incorrect paystubs in January, her last day was 12/20.

Netizens’ comments

1. Ask for proof. Make them send timecards, time stamps and paystubs for the year in question, so you can review to make sure there aren’t any other errors.
2. Their mistake they had three months to remedy it shouldn’t be up to you
3. So they’re saying they overpaid her after letting her go? That’s either a major error or a scam attempt.
4. They tried this with me at a previous job. A manager actually told me to ignore it. Nothing happened. It’s been a couple years at least.
5. 86$ after she was let go 3 months ago? A new high in low. I thought had heard it all. Ignore it.

My boyfriend owes me $15,000

I’ve worked so hard to stay out of poverty. I’ve worked so hard to make sure I never end up in this situation. And in a way, it’s still my fault.

Besides the money situation, my boyfriend is awesome. He is the most loving and supportive partner I’ve ever had. He truly is the love of my life.

Except for the fact that he’s terrible with money.

I got my degree, then waited for him to finish his degree and sat around in a job I didn’t like. Then, I decided to get a new job and move out.

He took a year off after graduation in that time and stayed home, which is fine, but what isn’t fine is the fact that he literally didn’t do anything except sit around and play video games while taking money from his mum and I was working a very stressful job to make money.

I should mention, he comes from a wealthy family and I don’t.

When I did my PhD, he moved in with me this time, which was awesome. once again didn’t have a job for a while. I gave him a break for a while but 6 months in and he still doesn’t have a job and all of a sudden he owes me like 8 grand, since I’ve been paying for his rent and his food.

He finally accepted the seriousness of this situation and apologized profusely for putting me in this predicament. I was relieved, since he understood and acknowledged how stressful this was for me, given that I have sacrificed essentially my whole life since I was 11 to make sure I am financially safe.

He finally got a low-paying job and started paying me off little by little… for a few months. Then he forgot a couple payments to me and seemed not to care, since I didn’t notice it, since I work an incredibly stressful job and have better things to do than babysit this man’s wallet.

Another year later and his debt to me has gotten up to $15,000. He told me again today that he’s so sorry and he will pay me back, but I really have no reason to believe him.

This is of course his fault, but it’s also my fault for choosing him. And letting him skate by this long. The thought of having to hound about paying me back every month for the next (at least) 1-3 years is so exhausting. It’s all exhausting.

And I’m already exhausted by everything else. I love him and he supports me in every other way, but I truly just need to be shown that he can be a goddamn adult. Thanks for letting me vent.

Unethical property agents?

Need some neutral opinions here.

Recently asked a friend doing property to help me look for a resale flat, and I saw a listing I loved so I sent it to him, and he went to engage the seller’s agent

Sat we managed to get a last min viewing. And the owners weren’t home. The seller agent told us the owners need 3 months extension to move out if we want the place.

And there are more viewings for the place next week, So in my mind, no hurry and we can slowly offer/ wait for people to offer so we can counter.

However my friend helped to follow up and realise there may be someone who already offered for the place. We asked what is the amount exactly, so we can counter if we want to.

But the seller agent refuse to disclose and just inform us its around mid to high 600k. So essentially we had to guess. So we offered 688k.

The seller agent told us he will let the owners know. To my horror the very next morning the seller agent told us the house is sold and we lost the bid.

I was suspicious the seller agent intentionally undermined my efforts so he can close the deal full commission by himself and get his awards.

So I casually went to chat up the owners and they were friendly, and I realised they did not get a price they liked for their house as they did not get another offer. And they sold it at 690k.

I was prepared to go up to 720k with my counter. Never given the chance as I had to guess the amount the other party gave.

And the owners informed they could move out anytime, no need 3 months extension. so they were ok with quick offers

So my question is , I may be wrong in approaching the owners direct, but I wouldn’t have found out that agent all along knew my offer was lower than his clients, but he kept quiet knowing I will lose the bid.

Did not tell me my amount was lower and kept quiet until the owners decide to go with 690k, the only other offer they had. Which is his full commission (There was another 640k offer but they rejected earlier )

If the agent had to co-broke with my friend, he will have to split his commission and earn less? And this is a clear case of fraudulent misrepresentation?

Wife (37F) cheated on me (40M). Kids. New house. I’m crushed.

Me (40m) got cheated on by wife (38 f) and I’m beside myself. We’ve got young kids. We just bought a house 8 months ago.

Found out she’s slept with a coworker many times over the past few months. This was a same coworker we were in therapy over about a year ago because she lied about meeting up with him a few times but swore nothing happened. We had moved on from it.

Then out of the blue I saw the last month or so worth of texts between them that showed up on an old iPad of hers my son dug out from the closet. It’s deep, there’s “love you babe”, meet ups. Meets ups in our house while I was working night shift. It’s worst-case scenario.

I don’t know what I’m looking for. Prob just needed to vent. I feel broken. Broken about not seeing my kids every day. Broken about the grand plans we had for our family. And that I’ll be turning 40 next month and have my world broken up.

Netizens’ comments

1. You get a lawyer, don’t leave the house for the sake of the kids, and keep it as peaceful as you can until the divorce is finalized.
   Understand that this person is no longer on your side, they don’t have your best interest in mind, so act accordingly.. do not show sympathy and give her more in the divorce than she can get without your help. I’m sorry this happened.
   Now’s the time to reach out to family and good guy friends who will be there and help you through this time. You’ll feel tempted over the next couple months to look for intimacy in other places, do not do this as it is not going to be in your best interest. Take time to heal and build the life you want without her in it.
   Do not share with her your plans of divorce or what you want post divorce. It’s going to be a hard transition, but remember this person is not on your team and only wants what’s best for her. Again sorry this happened.
2. I’m sorry this happened to you. It’s disgusting. You don’t deserve to be lied to and cheated on. No one does.
   I know that feeling of how can I ever trust my own decisions about a relationship.
   I wouldn’t even confront her yet. Contact a lawyer at this point. Take the proof you have with you to the lawyer and use it to set yourself up to an advantage for custody. Then ask her to leave the house. Cheater needs to leave. She can’t be trusted again.