I arrived at work on my first day full of excitement and anticipation. I had heard so much stories about the office building having many beautiful women who worked there.

Dreamt of dating an OL

I had even fantasized about getting a girlfriend who worked there.

I walked into the office, expecting to be surrounded by pretty girls everywhere. Instead, I was met with a room full of middle-aged men and women.

None of them were particularly attractive. I could feel my dream of a girlfriend slipping away.

I did my best to make the most of my first day, but it was hard to stay focused with all the disappointment weighing on my mind.

I kept thinking about the pretty girls I had heard about and how none of them were there.

Decided to ask colleague where are all the pretty girls at

At lunch, I decided to ask one of my colleagues about the situation. She told me that the company had recently laid off a lot of their female employees and had not replaced them.

This was why the office was full of men.

My dreams of getting an office lady girlfriend were officially dashed. I was devastated. I had been so excited about the possibility of finding love in the office.

Now it was all gone.

I spent the rest of the day in a daze, trying to make sense of the situation. How could this be happening?

It seemed like a cruel joke. I felt like I had been cheated out of something I was promised.

The next day I went back to work, but I felt like a part of me was missing. I was still surrounded by middle-aged men and women, and none of them were my special someone.

I kept this job for a about a year, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I had been robbed of something I was promised.

I eventually quit and never looked back.

It’s been a long time since I worked as a Human Resource Manager in Singapore. I’ve seen so many Singaporeans come through my office complaining about not being able to find a job.

Often complain about this and that

I’ve heard all sorts of excuses before when they refuse to take up a job.

They would always say that they feel like they don’t have enough experience or don’t have the right qualifications which is why they do not want to take up the job.

It’s always struck me as strange that these same people would then turn around and complain about not being able to find a job.

It’s no secret that the job market in Singapore is a competitive one.

I’ve been around long enough to know that it’s not just the lack of qualifications and experience that’s holding back Singaporeans from finding jobs.

Says most are always picky

It’s also the fact that they’re being picky. I’ve seen so many Singaporeans come in with a certain job in mind, only to find out that the job isn’t quite what they expected.

They’d rather wait for the perfect job to come along instead of simply taking what’s available.

This is a major problem for those who are unemployed, as the longer they wait, the more likely it is that their chances of finding a job will diminish.

I understand that people want to find the right job for them, but they also need to understand that they may have to make some compromises.

They need to understand that they can’t always get their dream job. Instead, they may need to take what’s available and work their way up from there.

Unfortunately, I’ve seen far too many Singaporeans turn down job offers simply because they’re not what they expected.

This is a mistake. It’s important for Singaporeans to understand that the job market is competitive and that they need to take what’s available and make the most of it.

It’s time for Singaporeans to start looking at the bigger picture and stop being so picky when it comes to job offers.

My husband just threw all the food I made him to celebrate his promotion and I have no one to confide in

I recently got married (less than 6 months). Husband got a promotion and I made him a nice dinner and asked if he wanted eat and celebrate with me.

He says no, I sigh and say okay.. I’ll just leave it here.

He comes up to me and tells me I’m being annoying bc he didn’t want to eat. Proceeds to throw the plate I made him from scratch into the trash.

Been driving around for 4 hours. Despite having friends and family, I have no one to confide

Netizens’ comments

1. Dont let him act and treat you like that without conséquences or it will be just the beginning!!
2. Tell him ” I put a lot of time and energy into something to celebrate an acheivement of yours and you choose to belittle me and throw away my efforts. I don’t deserve to be treated like that and I won’t tolerate being treated like that. I need a sincere apology and an understanding if this happens again, our relationship will be over. “
3. I’ve been married for 20 yrs… so let me tell you something.. He will treat you the way you allow him to treat you. Don’t allow this behavior. You set boundaries on how you want to be treated, and you don’t compromise. If he crosses those boundaries, you make good on the conditions you set with those boundaries. 6 mo in, this is alarming behavior. And if you don’t demand better and set hard boundaries how and have a back up plan to leave if he A. doesn’t recognize that his behavior was out of line AND B. Makes a real effort to get his temper under control.
4. I’m sorry OP. I’m sure your meal was wonderful. What did you make? I know I can’t eat it but I’ll always appreciate hearing about home-cooked meals that people put their heart into.
   As for your husband, he owes you a big apology at minimum. He doesn’t get to belittle you, and especially not for something as minor as being discouraged by his attitude. Is he always like this?

my boyfriend is unseducible.

I try everything from rubbing his thighs, his chest, sitting on his lap, grabbing his behind, kissing his neck, basically everything.

I can’t seem to turn him on when we only bang in bed when he initiates, I can’t initiate because otherwise he has no interest.

what’s worse is that he immediately pushes me off and says “stop it” because I think touch can be overstimulating or annoying to him

but it makes me feel so rejected and like I don’t turn him on

the only way I can turn him on is by literally taking my pants off, getting into bed at night and trying to rub up against him.

otherwise we don’t bang, because when I outright communicate that I want to, he says no. it’s really incredibly frustrating.

Netizens’ comments

• Does he have touch issues in general? Like on the spectrum?
• You are not physically compatible. It happens. Some folks simply aren’t emotionally, financially, culturally compatible. That is why relationships end. It’s healthy to admit when something isn’t working. You can do better.
• My wife is the same, tried talking to her. It’s just the way she is. It’s hard because I want to build the tension before hand not get right into it.

I would really like to have a mom

I’m a 19 year old guy, my mom died of cancer in 2008, I grew up around a decent dad, but still, a dad and a mom aren’t the same, women are better at showing emotions.. also, my dad is like a character straight out of a Western movie, he’s very rough.

I’m friends with a woman who is 14 years older than me, I was originally attracted to her because she’s really cute. She’s nice to me, nice and caring,

sometimes I look at her and think ”I wish she was my mom”. I don’t want to make her uncomfortable though and i just tell her that I love her like an older sister and she gets emotional every time I say that.

This may sound awkward, but I really want a mother figure because I grew up without one. I’d genuinely like to have a mom.

Netizens’ comments

• Oh honey this broke my heart. As a mama I always wish I could just adopt everyone who needs mom. I grew up without one parent and it’s hard. It might not be much but if you ever need someone to talk to I’d be happy to be a long distance mama. Sending you lost of love ❤️ and I’m proud of you.
• I’m 23f, my mother passed from when cancer when I was young, 3 years old, 2003. There are times I cry hard in my car or myself to sleep. The only thing I want is my mother to hold me and tell me everything’s alright. She is the only person, thing, that I feel could cure my sadness, loneliness inside, and make me feel everything will be alright. She’s the only one who can take this sadness inside and fill me with safety, true love, and acceptance. Motherly love is once in a life time and longing for her never seizes. When I have children of my own, I will fill them with every ounce of what I never had, what my mother never had the chance to give, what I never had the chance of receiving. My heart goes out to you.
• I can sympathize, lost my mother at 17, I’m 54 now. Do what I didn’t, go get some therapy if you can and talk about all of this. I had a great older sister who is a pretty darn good substitute for talking and sharing, but I learned to cope the hard way. I was too ashamed to admit I missed my mom when I was in my 20’s, I wish I had sought therapy. I hope you find some peace.
• Hey I can relate, our moms left in the same year OP, I’m sure they’re good friends up there :))) they really left us abit too early eh

I(33F) asked my husband (31M) to wear a condom and he freaked out

In the last few months my husband had some questionable behavior, enough that I had to ask him if he had cheated.

Even though he denies it, I’ve asked him to start wearing condoms when we get intimate, just until we work some things out with a therapist.

I’m honestly conflicted about whether or not a believe him and I want to give him the benefit it of the doubt so I felt like him wearing a condom would allow us to move forward in our relationship while still keeping me “safe”. It would take a lot of anxiety away for me.

When I asked him to do this he freaked out. He said he believes a man shouldn’t have to wear a condom in a marriage and that it takes away all the pleasure for him to do this.

He told me if I’m concerned about pregnancy I should get on birth control (we have talked about this in the past and I explained that I am not able to be on birth control for a variety of reasons and that I had tried).

He’s been super mean toward me for the last couple of days and pretty much told me he won’t sleep with me if he has to wear a condom.

He told me he needs time to mentally process my request. He’s making me feel like I am asking him to do something horrible and i genuinely don’t know how to respond.

I explained very honestly why I was asking for this and that it would just be until we got through some therapy (not forever) and his response and reaction made me feel like I am just an object HE OWNS to get his D wet with however he wants. My feelings didn’t seem to be relevant at all. I’m really confused.

My mom walked in on me changing and saw whipping marks on my back, now I don’t know how to proceed

I’ve (22F) been in a relationship with Mark (27M) for around three months. We were friends for a few years before dating each other (we also had on-and-off no-strings-attached encounters over the years as well).

Mark is into domination, I am into pain, we get turned on by these extreme acts of intimacy so of course our chemistry in bed is off the charts, and chalk that in with the fact we know each other extremely well, it really helps.

I stayed over at his place for the weekend and he whipped me, and I thoroughly enjoyed the experience.

I am into feeling the after-effects of the whipping as well because it doesn’t just last when I’m being hit but afterwards there’s a certain feeling I get when I’m the only person knowing what’s under my clothes.

Anyways, I got home yesterday morning, and while I was changing, my mother walked in and saw my back, she had an extreme reaction, a moment of absolute horror, and for me, I was embarrassed she saw that, but she also didn’t knock.

Now I am stuck not knowing how to proceed, because every single time I walk by her she looks like she’s got a multitude of questions running through her mind.

Has anyone had to explain something like this to their parents? Should I just leave it and allow time to pass and pretend as if nothing happened??

I broke up with my bf after I learned he cheated on his ex

Me (24F) and my ex (28M) have been together for 10 months now. Our relationship had been good so far, some light arguments here and there but nothing worth breaking up over.

A little context is that I despise cheaters. I have not been cheated on but I have seen the aftermath of what happened to those close to me. It affected a huge aspect of their lives and it took them a long time to get over it.

When we were still in the talking stage, I have already shown my strong dislike for cheating/cheaters. He told me he wasn’t that kind of person and that he’ll never do it to me. Fast forward from that time, he pursued me and eventually we got together. Sometimes, I would show him news about local celebrities and cheating scandals and I would trash talk the cheaters. He would mostly just keep quiet and agree with what I say.

During our relationship, we shared our dating history to each other. It was nothing too serious just the basics of what happened, how long it was, their name, and why they broke up. I was pretty happy in the relationship at this time.

It all went downhill two weeks ago when we were invited to his friend’s party. They were catching up so I decided to get drinks for my then bf and I. When I was deciding what to get, I heard one of them say “Oh damn, Maya got married.” There was another couple with me in the kitchen so I asked “Who’s Maya?” I knew the name of his friends and their gfs so I was pretty surprised since they never mentioned a Maya before. They looked uncomfortable when I asked and told me to ask my bf for it later. I didn’t have any clues to who Maya was whatsoever. I got back with the drinks and was bothered by it the whole night.

When he drove me home, I decided to ask him who Maya was and told him I overheard them say her name. He got nervous and told me not to hate him after what he’ll tell me. He also told me he didn’t mean to keep this from me but he was scared of how I’ll react to it. At this time, I got a bad feeling in my gut. He then proceeded to share how Maya was his ex gf who he cheated on. They were together for 3 years but 2 years into the relationship, he wanted to find some spice in his life so he cheated on her with Lily for almost a year. They had a bad breakup when Maya knew and he dated Lily shortly after. He told me it was the stupidest decision he’s ever made and that he was young and dumb at that time. He assured me that he would never cheat on me and that he changed.

Obviously, I was dumbfounded. I told him I needed some time to think and for a whole week we had no contact. When I was ready to talk, I texted him to meet in a café we frequented in and I told him I was breaking up with him. He was very upset and begged me to rethink my decision. I was firm and so we split ways. Our mutual friends eventually knew of the breakup and days after, some of them called me AH because I was punishing him for a mistake he made years ago. They told me he planned to propose to me during our 1 year anniversary. I do feel bad for him but I still think I did right by breaking up because my perception of him changed when he told me. Even if I did stay, I don’t think I could ever trust him fully.

My(19m) son is dating my boss(50f)

I found out about it yesterday when I came home two hours early and found the two of them making out and getting it on.

It’s been going on for a month now, according to them. He insists that he knows what he’s doing but the age gap and the dynamics are both worrying.

My son said she was the one who made the first move and she admitted to this as well. They both tell me they are serious and my son begged me to accept the relationship.

Netizens’ comments

1. Of course, she made the 1st move and will bet if you and him talk more, he may come to his own conclusion how disgusting this is.
2. Gender swap it and ask the same question. No reason why the answer needs to be different.
   Not sure what you can do though. Does your son work at the same place? HR issue?
   Maybe you just have to let it play out because I don’t see what other options you have. Outside of just being there for if/when it falls apart.
3. This sounds like a conflict of interest for your boss.
   Does your son understand you can be in deep trouble at work? If you get fired because your boss got fed up with your son or whatever, does your son understand you won’t be able to pay the bills and getting a job right now is difficult?
   Is this a big company with HR or is this like a business in which your boss is the owner?
   You need to tell HR because this person cannot be your supervisor anymore. Your boss can retaliate at work if you do not accept their relationship, or if they break, or for whatever reason. That’s highly problematic.
4. it is super creepy of her, your son is totally blinded by it, HOWEVER if you so much as try to split them up, chances are you will create distance with your son and when things go south, he may not come to you or may feel stuck. The only thing you can do is make sure he still sees his friends, still studies and takes the necessary steps to build his future and allow this to crumble as it will. Also, make sure people know about this. Shame is a strong deterrent.