Back then I believed in true love but I started to see the comfort of another woman, they have boyfriends to chauffeur them around and I’m taking bus and MRT with my boyfriend.

Soon I got a bf with a car, but it was an old broken piece of junk he calls it a “car”. It was so noisy and the aircon was never cold. I ended it with him because I did not feel comfortable. I needed some more atas car to fit me.

So, I’m a gold digger. But not the way you’re thinking about it, I’m a pro. I check the newspapers for financial transactions, then “bump into” someone who’s just made a lot of money and ask them out, that’s how I met my current husband, but he was a player for most of his life so he genuinely thought i was into him (or so i thought at the time).

he implied that he was exhausted from the drama and just wanted a homely girl to be the mother of his children, so i played the part and kept up the charade as we were dating, and then as we got engaged, then married.

Unlike a lot of professional gold diggers, my final goal wasn’t some doormat workaholic husband who will fund a lifestyle of luxury for me as he toiled endlessly while I swiped his credit cards all day. I just wanted to live an upper middle-class lifestyle as a stay at home mom, i genuinely wanted kids, and wanted to be the best mom i could.

But slowly i found myself falling in love with my husband. I lived a pretty brutal life and developed somewhat sociopathic tendencies as a result like being able to use people without feeling guilty and not caring about people, but one day as i woke up next to him and thought about how i would be really broken if he died, or left me somehow i realized my feelings for him were genuine, i felt bad about manipulating him, and after a few weeks i gathered up the courage and told him everything, how I’m a gold digger who wanted him for his money, and how i played a part the whole time so he would marry me, but to my surprise he just laughed it off and went on with what he was doing

He told me he knew all along, and how he was already cynical about relationships and “understood” that whoever he married wouldn’t be 100 percent genuine and that’s just “something you have to deal with” I’m partly relieved that he’s not gonna divorce me, but I’m also bummed out, it’s totally reasonable to not trust me because of what i did, but it’s a bit too much to not trust anyone. Is there any way i can show him that I’m genuinely into him now, and invested in the relationship?

A young man shared his encounters with a woman that is much older than him.

Here is the story:

Hi I’m 21(M) and I was matched with a 44(F) in the dating app and I was there for fun. So we met up after a few chats.

3 months later I went to her place and I spent a night with her. I’m surprised she is so good in bed.I thought women at her age passed childbearing, so I dared to do it. Now I regretted it because she told me she was pregnant a month plus later. I suggested her to go for an abortion because I am not ready to start a family, and since she is older than me, she should be able to pay for the abortion.

She got angry with me and stopped contacting me thereafter.

I got to know a few days ago she didn’t go for an abortion, and she is pregnant with my twins. What shall I do? To get back in touch with her again? I still not ready to start a family, especially with a woman much older than me.

Here is what netizens think:

• Nicely done. U had your fun and then U decided to walk away and let her handle the abortion fees.U are 21, U are too young to start a family. I can already see your future going down the drain.I believe the logical thing to do is not to get married, but be there for the twins when they are born. No one says you have to be a husband, but U definitely need to fulfill the role of a father to provide.Lastly, there are other holes to upload your shit if U really dun want to be a father. Please exercise some self control, it’s becoz of people like U that some kids will grow up unhappy and become rebellious.

So you did it with someone old enough to be your mother, and because of you she’s going to be mother to a pair of twins young enough to be her grandchildren…

• Boy,one moment of shiok dong dong give u life time of seow ding dong.You will live with the stigma forever in your life

• If I’m you, I will get back with her cos I will not have to worry about her getting pregnant during her pregnancy period.

• She can sue you for child support and you will be financially impoverished for the next 21 years! And at 44, she is at risk of pregnancy complication or giving birth to baby with special needs.

What car to get

Company is giving me 1.2k per month car allowance. Should I go get sth new and a higher end car such as a Tesla, Merc or BMW?

I’ll be changing jobs soon to one which need me to travel frequently around the island to meet customers.

Currently do not own a car and will need to get one due to the job nature. Some people have advised me to just be prudent and get a 2nd hand jap/ Korean car.

I’m thinking firstly to get sth reliable and comfortable since I’ll be on the road often. Sure I’ll need to use more than 50% of my savings to get a better car but since I’m only young once and it’s my first car, I hoping to get sth impressive to enjoy too.

My background-26M, working for a year since grad and no other big commitments like house or marriage anytime soon. Guys, what do you think?

Netizens’ comments

1. Go and read up and research on car ownership before you buy. 1.2k won’t even cover the instalment on a real high end car. Not forgetting insurance, for first time car owner, insurance is expensive. Then road tax 400 and above, and fuel depending on your engine capacity, easily above 100. Then season parking leh?
   If I were you, unless I need to drive my customer around, which I suspect you don’t else company should have assign you a high end car to drive, I won’t even buy a car. I’ll just grab/gojek/taxi everywhere and still have a comfortable sum left. No need to headache so much, got pple drive me, no need to worry about parking also.
   And car is a depreciating asset. And as a first time car owner I won’t even buy a new car. Definitely get a second hand one if die die need one in decent condition, so if scratch or dent not so heart pain.
2. what kind of decent car can you get with 1.2k only? lol unless you’re planning to top up quite a bit.
   not to mention the upfront cost assuming a decent car ( assuming the cheapest bmw 1 series is about 160k, means you need to fork out about 65k upfront.) and about 1800 per month instalment
3. Take MRT and where it takes too long use grab. 1.2k will do the job easily and you don’t have to maintain a car. Less is more.

Any advice on changing friendship to relationship

Hi all, 5 years ago when I was at my 20s I had 2 really close guy friends who used to chase me, 1 was really handsome with a decent personality while the other was a little uglier but has a really bubbly and gentle personality

Ultimately I fell into a relationship with the handsome one and just kept the other guy in the friendzone. Fast forward till today, my BF of 5 years recently dumped me for another girl and the other guy is currently still going strong in his relationship.

I didn’t forge any friendships with any other guys because I was fully loyal in the relationship and I don’t find it appropriate.

I know I was being superficial about looks in the past but I’ve changed alot since then, is there any way I can win him back?

Netizens’ comments

1. It’s your turn in the friendzone.
2. Send me your pic and see if we can talk.
3. Well ure alone now n the guys are in a relationship. Time for you to find someone else other than him
4. Pls dun be the third party in his relationship.
5. You should screw yourself now you deserve it
6. He’s already in a relationship of his own. Don’t go breaking people up for your own selfishness. Grow up.
7. It’s too late la. Treat it as you met the right person at the wrong timing. Ppl happy in rs leh. Don’t go break the couple up leh.
8. You deserve it, go and do some reflection. Now is your turn to see him love someone else.
9. People you find ugly can still cheat, have bad personalities…etc. Doesn’t mean if you’d chosen friend B you both will work out.
10. Please spare the ugly but innocent guy. He deserves better, and you are not it.

Married and Single Workers

I’m getting fed up with the attitude of the married workers. They disappear from work as and when they like and make the single non-married workers do their work.

As much as we express compassion towards those who are married and try to understand their difficulties of extra household burden.

There sometimes have to be a line drawn and not taking the singles and use them for granted.

These are the black sheep who are making employer be cautious towards hiring married staff and putting the hardworking people’s potential job opportunities at stake.

Tell your boss and it appears you are selfish. Don’t tell your boss and you have to tank the laziness of the married workers.

Netizens’ comments

1. Wow. A new form of discrimination
2. Your last statement says it all. You want change but you don’t dare to highlight the issue
   You don’t dare = You don’t deserve it
   Simple rules of life. Stop hiding and open your golden mouth.
3. u can suan them indirectly that they are using married as excuse, without insulting the actual person. like “imaginary spouse”, “right/left hand” etc
4. You are immature. You assume you will never need the help of a co-worker if you need to take time off to take care of your parents etc etc. A work place which supports the workers who genuinely need to take care of their family etc is a good workplace and you should treasure it! Wait till you work in a ‘sweat shop’ which treats you like dirt, then you will know the meaning of “fed up”.
5. My boss thinks otherwise though. S/He prefers married employees, and best if they have a kid min. because they won’t job-hop as much as single employees as they prefers job stability and are too busy to be looking out.

6 interviews in and the boss sets up a final call to tell me I didn’t get the job

Absolutely demoralized right now. I spent months interviewing for a six figure position.

Recruiter interview, hiring manager interview, interview with senior members, skills assessment, interview with sales team, and a final cultural fit interview with the VP. I nailed every single interview.

So the hiring manager emails to schedule a final call about the position. I’m absolutely giddy, usually that’s a major sign that I got the job and they wanted to give me the good news.

Turns out it was a call to tell me that I interviewed perfectly but was just missing one skill that another candidate had.

WTF. These companies are so f-ing tone deaf it’s ridiculous. An email would have f-ing sufficed.

Just some advice to those out there, no company deserves loyalty, they don’t give one shit about you so make sure you don’t give one shit about them.

Do the bare minimum to keep your job, take your vacation even if it inconveniences other, go on medical leave if you have it available, take breaks from this bullshit capitalist system.

What matters is your physical and mental health and no company is worth it.

Netizens’ comments

1. 3 interviews max. Any more than that and they should be paying you for your time.
2. 6 interviews?? Ain’t nobody got time for that
3. This is just what they do now. Last year 5 round interview. Radio silence of 2 weeks after my last interview. Email from the recruiter saying the job doesn’t exist anymore. Like such a cruel way to fill an employee’s workflow.
4. We had an internal worker who had been temping a job for two years. The job is finally posted and they make her apply and do multiple interviews. She doesn’t get it because the other candidate has masters and she doesn’t.
   She thought bummer and maybe next time. Then they told her the newbie would need to be trained by her on everything because she’s never used any of our systems and only worked as an intern during her masters.
   In amazing twist of fate, she went to HR and get transferred to a new department before newbie could start. Leaving the training to the supervisor, I’m sure that went well.

My wife cheated on me with a 27-year old virgin

This is a long story. But Ill try and keep it short as possible. A year ago in February my wife cheated on me with a a co-worker of hers. He was a 27-year old virgin who still lived at home with his mom.

At first, we were in terms that we were separating but chose to live together still due to our bankruptcy we have going on.

At the time it seemed like the best idea to make sure that we both had a roof over our heads and that our daughter wouldnt miss out on any time with us.

But, maybe a week in to us agreeing to the separation she seemed distant with me and my daughter. Not like avoiding us but not being in the same room or really interacting with us after work.

She would just stay on her phone texting and hiding the screen. I Obviously grew suspicious and was hurt. Our separation was still fresh and I wasnt 100% on board with it.

Fast forward maybe a week and me her begin talking about working things out. But still during every evening she was distant and hiding her phone.

One day during all the talks of working it out I had to pick her up at her work. I seen her from a distance walking in a crowd of people and right up on her was a guy she had to tell to stay away from her 3 years ago due to him annoucing that he had more feelings than just at a friendship level.

I watched her get close and scratch his chin like she would do to me. She got in our car and I immediately confronted her about it. But she just said she does that to everyone.

At this time Im an emotional wreck and nowhere near in a good mindset due to her going back and forth with working it out or not.

A day later I had to pick her up again. She was alone on her walk to our car. On our drive home I told her to show me her text messages.

She immediately lost it, kinda like a cornered animal. I asked her to swear on our daughter she wasnt leading me along with her co worker.

She sweared nothing was happening and we drove home. During me making dinner she said she had to go for a drive and took our daughter with her.

Maybe about 10 minutes later she called me and said we had to talk. She picked me up and we drove down a road close to home. Thats where she told me she had been hooking up with her co worker.

This wasnt my proudest moment but I absolutely lost it. With weeks of being told we’ll work it out and then her hitting me with that, I coudlnt keep it together.

I drove us to her aunts house so i could have a better understanding of what i was just hit with and so that our daughter wouldnt have to watch it.

Fast forward maybe 2 weeks later, my wife told me that a night she was supposed to be out with her one friend was actually with him.

This was weeks before anything was ever said about our separation. I asked her how she could go out and cheat and she stood her ground claiming that going out with him wasnt cheating.

After months of this she decides to date him. I know i cant do anything about it but that doesnt mean I have like him. Cant stand looking at him personally.

Every child pick up it would just be me and my ex-wife doing the talking and i wouldnt acknowledge him. Until one time he came into my home and i was sure to let him know he wasnt welcome in it.

I asked a guy out for the first time yesterday and he rejected me

I keep seeing that apparently women are now making the first move like they are asking men out on dates or being more assertive like paying for dates and stuff.

I was always scared to do this. But I decided to give it a try espc since I hear men would love to be approached since they don’t get much female attention

I asked out this cute guy from my work. I see him a lot outside my work building during breaks and I’ve spoke to him a couple times. I asked him on a date and he looked at me and laughed and said “sorry no” and he walked away from me

I spent my break crying in my car

I AM NEVER DOING THIS AGAIN !

Netizens’ comments

1. This is what it is to ask someone out and get harshly rejected, regardless of gender.
2. Happens to most people many times before finding the right person. Gotta get in and dust yourself off, then move on.
3. This was just one guy. Don’t let it make you unwilling to put yourself out there. Rejection stings, but most folks get rejected a bunch before finding the right person. You now know he was not the one, so you won’t waste any more time pining for him.
4. Bi woman here….every man, including my finance, I’ve approached first. Sometimes I got shot down and sometimes it worked. Yeah it hurts the ego to be “rejected” but I’m almost certain you’ve probably rejected people as well.
5. Oh man that sucks. I’m sorry. Be careful about dating people you work with, though. It’s not worth it usually
6. You don’t hit every shot you take, that doesn’t mean stop shooting. Just work on your game.
7. It’s how you bounce back from rejection that will be the making of you. Pick yourself up, build on your confidence, understand rejection is a shitty part of life and next time ask them why, if they’re going to be rude, make them awkward. No wait sorry, that’s petty me speaking, don’t ask why, just hold your head high and know your worth.

New hires making almost 50% more than me for half the qualifications, deny raise

I’m just super mad right now and need a space to vent. This happened yesterday. I found out about a month ago that the job posting for an open position in our department was paying nearly 50% more than what I currently make.

I haven’t gotten a single raise in 4 years, not even a cost of living raise (they blamed covid and stopped doing raises for a bit). I’m looking at this job posting, and the requirements they’re asking for are barely qualifying for the job we do.

I spent the last couple weeks planning a pitch to upper management that those already in the department should be paid at least as much as a new hire.

I have the experience, the knowledge, the certifications, etc. that they aren’t even asking from this new hire, and I haven’t had a raise in years. I deserve this. I’ve earned this.

And I was turned down flat. On top of that, I was told I needed to work on “bringing value” to the company, and then was listed a series of things I need to work on.

In my entire time working at this company, I’ve never gotten a bad performance review. All of these “issues” were completely out of the blue.

I work my ass off. I pull overtime. I’ve developed health issues due to the stress of my job. They expect me to train the new hire, on top of that. But yeah, I’m not bringing value to the company. If I wasn’t so entirely enraged, I’d laugh.

So, from here until I find a new job, they get 10% of my effort. They get the bare minimum of what my job requires.

They get no overtime, they get no free training for someone making significantly more than me. If they’re going to treat me and pay me like I half-ass work, then I’ll show them how much “value” they are losing when I am actually half-assing my work.

And when I find a new job, which I am aggressively searching for at the moment, whether they get the privilege of a notice at all will entirely depend on how respectful they act between now and then.