Is it normal to feel so tired & burnt out? I feel there isn’t any work life balance in Singapore.

I’ve been working for a while now, and on my only free days – I spend almost 12 hours sleeping because I’m so tired.

On my working days, I get about 5 hours of sleep and go to work for about 11-12 hours. I work really hard.

On my free days, I really have no energy and I just want to spend my entire day in bed. I don’t even eat. If I could sleep for the entire day – I most likely would. I have no mood to do anything, I just want to sleep and be left alone.

I don’t have much of a social life, my friends are mostly busy with their own lives so nobody calls me out too.

I’ve been under so much stress that I’ve been getting pimples lmao and frequent painful headaches.

Is this just me or does anyone else feel really tired?

Netizens’ comments

1. Apart from others’ suggestion to get more sleep (ideally 7.5 hours per night), might be worth looking at how you’re planning your work day.
   For starters, 11-12 hours consistently is unsustainable. Doing so will lead to tiredness and eventually burnout, as you’ve pointed out.
   Assuming you’re working in an office job, what’s holding you back from completing your work within the set hours? Do you have focused time for work, or are multitasking hence leading to unproductively hence extended hours? If your team understaffed? Are you taking frequent breaks to reset your mind in between?
   Once you sort out your sleep & work cycles, I recommend you also look at your diet and exercise. Cliche as it sounds, you are what you eat (or not eat in your instance). Gotta fuel up healthily cause no one can run on empty.
2. It is not normal.
   -Your working hours are way longer than average.
   -Your sleeping hours are way shorter than average.
   -You are more socially isolated compared to the average person.
   It is harmful.
   -You body just needs rest and is frequently crashing on weekends.
   -The physical recovery leaves no time and strength for social interaction.
   -This leaves the brain starved of variation to routine.
   This can be fixed.
   -Cut your long working hours.
   -Get regular sleep.
   -Spend the extra free time for fun and friends. Call the friends yourself. Don’t wait.
   Good luck. Yes, you are burnt out. Hope you can take action and get better.

I can’t relate to a lot of people’s common childhood experiences. And I feel pretty left out.

Example 1 : People told me that they need to hide under the blanket to feel safe from potential “ghost” attacking. Or they won’t let their foot hang outside of the bed area or else something will pull them. I couldn’t relate cause logically if there’s ghost or monsters, why are they so immune to the blanket when they can just take it off and attack you?

Example 2 : People told me they felt panic when their mom asked to wait in line to pay while she go get something, and as the line moves pretty fast, people told me the panic is real cause their mom is not back yet to pay and it’s close to their turn at the cashier. I couldn’t relate to the panic feeling cause when my mom asked me to wait in line, and when it’s my turn, I simply just say I’m sorry and that my mom is not here yet, so I just went back in line. What is there to panic about? Obviously you can’t pay, so just go back.

And many other childhood things people typically experiences, I just couldn’t relate. Everyone seems to bond really well when they talk about it. I feel really left out.

No one ever experienced the things I do in a different way of thinking too I guess.

Here are what netizens think:

• It sounds like you would like to get in touch with your emotions. Enjoy life as it comes, the highs and the lows.

• I can’t relate to this post. Logically, if you cannot relate to others then cannot relate lor. Who asked anyway?

• You have just been logiyouve been logical and practical since young. Its commonsense. Don’t bother about others.

8 Reasons why I want to stay single

*This article may be sensitive or offensive to some people, Viewer discretion is advised*

1. I want a Mancave (pretty self explanatory) and wanting someone that likes the same things as I do (games and anime) and attractive or at least decently looking at the same time (sounds f*** up I know, looks like I am expecting so much for someone that is average looking). I like games and anime, which i will less likely have high chance to find a partner with the same hobby, even if I did, most of also have high beauty expectations of their partner.

2. I have NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder), will hurt the people around me or have disagreement and conflict, especially people I stay with in the future (based on past experiences staying in rental flats with landlord)

3. I don’t see myself as a man, more rather like a guy that refuses to grow up. I don’t want to succumb to the society expectation and pressure. I have alot of questions about life and I am not bending my will against anything unless my questions get answered and I get a reason to everything that happens. I don’t want to accept the things for what they are. I know many people just accept life the way as it is and just succumb to life but that’s not what I want to live my life and this is the conviction that I have that may not align with many people out there that just want to live their lives normally and follow the crowd and go with the flow.

4. Need to impress females with dressing and styles, which means

a. I need to spent more buying more expensive clothes rather than uniqlo

b. I need to wear clothes that I don’t like just to impress people

c. I cannot wear the clothes that I like, that includes clothes that are comfy, looks cool and not suits and ties that are tight, suffocating, boring and plain.

5. I am not a sweet or smooth talker or someone that will say mushy things to impress girls, or what gen z called “Rizz”, or someone that will soften words or cushion words to make everything sound okay to flatter girls. I also have low EQ so I probably won’t be able to get out of tricky situations using wits nor outsmart high eq people.

6. I am not good looking or attractive, and I will be in competition with thousands and thousands of guys out there that are willing to put in the effort to dress up and impress people. Guys nowadays are going far to the extent of spending alot of money on membership going to the gym, protein shakes, eating chicken breast or plain food, wearing makeup, painting nails and taking care of their skin with tons of skincare products. I am not willing to go to that extend just so I can compete with those guys out there.

7. High cost of living; I am not rich and I do not want to climb the corporate ladder as I want to avoid all politics and drama at all cost. I also want to be happy go lucky person and doing what I love. I don’t want to do the things I don’t like. As a result, I will not be successful and earning more income than the rest of the guys out there that are willing to sacrifice. It doesn’t benefit me in anyway to get a partner other than buying a house.

8. *DEAL BREAKER* I have very bad experience with women, almost like PTSD from my encounter with my landlord (my friend’s mum ) and also my friend herself. Basically I rented a room with them and there are alot of horror stories of her being calculative and trying to restrict my freedom and putting fear onto me, few times invading my privacy by going into my room and claiming that I stole her stuff when it’s just very small things like clothes peg and rags. She also extorted me to pay her the full price of the WiFi upgrade even though I only used it for few months and I paid for it but she demanded me to pay the remaining even when I moved out, putting the blame onto me saying that it’s because of me that they upgraded the WiFi, even though they are also benefiting from the WiFi. She also uses society standards and expectation to put pressure on me and wanting to conform me into the typical person that fits into social norm.She brings me out for meals on the pretense of wanting to use it show that kindness to me and then using it to control me and gaslight me into being a obedient person to them, says that they helped me alot and I am being ungrateful. They expect alot in return for the kindness they shown me when i didn’t even ask it in the first place. She also constantly harass me during working hours by spam WhatsApp or email me and demanding I reply her email immediately, if not she will threaten to chase me out. She also did not give me any tenancy agreement and then even when she did she says she doesn’t want to give me because she wants to protect herself. Overall she is a very overbearing and calculative person and uses all kinds of methods and tricks to gaslight me in making me the most evil person that trying to ruin their lives when I am just trying to live my own life in peace without disturbance. She gave me so much emotional and mental damage to the point where I need to seek a counsellor for therapy.

I also rmb during my primary sch, a female classmate also extorts me money because I accidentally broke her pencil or pencil case I forgotten but something alone the line, she say if I don’t give her money she will inform the teacher and her parents, at that time my mum wasn’t around alr and there is no one I could seek help or advice from, I also don’t know what to do and for fear she will report on me, I kept taking money from my grandma to pay her just so she won’t report me. At that time I didn’t even know I was being extorted.

Basically, it’s just one vicious cycle after another just to catch up with another vicious cycle IMO. E.g needing to climb corporate ladder to have more earning power so that I can dress better, be more attractive and impress others. It’s just one thing that leads to the other.

In summary, I’m a f*** up average person that is boring and nerdy af that likes attractive women but doesn’t want to give a slightest damn effort to dress up and impress others but yet at the same time wanting to get everything. Which is absolutely impossible and I know it myself. So I just gonna stay single for the rest of my life and just live my life my own in peace while letting the rest of the world fighting among themselves.

OR

If I can really find a nerdy girl that likes anime and games and yet attractive at the same time, that also happens to like me at the same time(virtually nearly impossible, chances of it is 0.06% gacha rate or God blesses)

sorry for the long post ahead!!!

The company I’m interning at now planned nothing for me during my summer internship.

This internship was different from what I was studying but still somewhat relevant. During the interview, it was discussed with me that i would be involved in an implementation project, but after accepting it and a few weeks before the start of the internship, I was informed of a change in my supervisor due to restructuring which i didnt think much of as i assumed the work would be the same.

But on day one, I found out that my supervisor changed as the department’s division that I was supposed to be tagged to was consolidated with a third party company within the same building with all the projects being handed over to them. and my supposed department’s job scope had completely changed! My supervisor had nothing planned for me and put me under them where they were nice enough to let me tag along, but this also meant I am always in a different office from my supposed supervisor. I didn’t ask my sch’s mentor for advice bc i assumed it would be fine, pls dont flame me i just wanted to learn to be independent;-;

So ever since day 1, I have been trying to learn from the third party team I am tagged to, and having to ask for work every day for 2months now. Luckily for me, the third party team was nice enough to give me 2 projects to work on both with very different job scopes.

I know i shouldnt be complaining about this but the projects were mostly put on hold most of the time after I’ve reached a deliverable, and now one of them has been on hold for a month as they do not have a no way for me to test the prototype due to their restrictions and slow response time from seeking approvals/advice on their side. and my2nd project just came a few weeks ago and is also delayed due to slow response from clients. so ive still been just asking for work daily while waiting, ive been given some adhoc tasks which i completed quickly and properly, other than that theres mostly nothing to do at my desk. i do try to watch/learn new things online during this “free” time but i just feel so useless during these 2 months.

To add on, because the 1st projecthad no deadlines, my workplan was not very detailed even after discussing it with the third party team and my supposed supervisor. so it got rejected and now i have to submit a revised one, and i think the sch’s mentor seemed unhappy about it in his comments saying im learning lesser. so now im worried about the doing the sch report and end of internship presentation. i’ve still been asking for work and projects to be involved in but there’s nothing much going on with my projects and in general while I wait…

what should i do for my report and presentation? and for my final month while waiting for said projects?

I really think that the world will be a better place without my mum and people like her. She is everything that’s harmful for the society: racist, homophobic, gosip monger, etc. She treated me like an investment and even unhappy that I only booked a 4-star hotels for her instead of a 5-star ones for our trip to Bali.

I got a scholarship when I was 15, so she actually didn’t spent much money on me as she barely gave me allowance but she paid off my brother’s tuition loan fee debt and even sponsor him to study in Europe for his master. She always get sensitive when I brought this up and start emotional blackmailing me saying that she is old (she is only 62, not even that old) and doesn’t have much time left (lol, how I wish). I suspect that she has a mental illness. She is really toxic and I just hope to cut her off from my life. But I love my dad, so I cannot just cut her off and just keep my dad.

Here are what netizens think:

I am known for having unconventional views. Anyway please ignore if you disagree

The world may or may not be a better place without certain people

We will never know

We can never know

Even if we know we cant change

There was someone who tried and many died so let’s not go into that

Now that we know we have to coexist with people who we may not like, agree with the question is how to coexist with them

1) talk to them, understand them

This is the first step to trying to coexist with them

2) if you can’t coexist with them

Then you can choose to pretend to coexist with them or minimise your interaction with them

The problem will be solved one day with time