My boyfriend doesn’t get why I feel inferior to his (Gorgerous) female friend and it gets on my nerves
My boyfriend has a female friend who is very attractive and with whom we usually go out (Among other friends). They have known each other for a very long time, actually they went to school together, and I knew my boyfriend during my second year of uni.

I am, on the other hand, conventionally unattractive and quite the opposite to his friends in terms of looks. She is all I wish to be (Petite, good with makeup, small nose, etc). When I sit beside her I feel awful, like I were some kind of freak or monster.

Make no mistake, I like her. She is a perfectly sweet and respectful girl and we are becoming friends. And she has never attempted to cross any boundaries with my boyfriend. But still she intimidates me and makes me feel inferior.

I told my boyfriend about and it was like I were talking in other language. He just didn’t understand why I felt this way and pretended that the looks inequality between me and his friends didn’t exist, which really frustrated me.

Netizens’ comments

1. Are you sure you’re conventionally unattractive though, or if it’s just what you think?
   Either way he’s with you. Not her. So he obviously finds you attractive! She might not be his type in the looks department in the first place either. Just keep in mind that he’s likely not trying to disregard your feelings, but rather just doesn’t understand why you feel that way in the first place, because he doesn’t view you the same way you view yourself.
2. Envy will consume you and your relationship. Your bf won’t call you out constantly on your insecurity, he probably finds you attractive. It is really toxic to constantly hammer him on something he can’t fix.
3. So I work with a girl. She doesn’t think much of herself. She shows me pics of her friends and says she feels that they are more attractive than her. Ngl, her friends are basic and I find her much much more attractive than them and most girls I meet.
4. What did you expect/want him to say? You’re frustrated that he doesn’t see the “looks inequality”, would it be better if he agreed with you, and told you you’re uglier?
   And what is he supposed to do about it? Not be friends with her? Call her ugly?
   This is obviously not your boyfriends problem to fix. Your insecurity and inferiority complex is 100% on you

The girl am dating said she had better partners before me.

I ( 26m) was having lunch at my place with my girlfriend of 2 months (22f) and out of nowhere she asked if she was the best in bed that I’ve ever had.

The question took me by surprise, i wasn’t sure what to answer especially that we hadn’t been intimate long enough for me to determine anything, so i went for the safe answer and said yes.

She looked at me weirdly then laughed , when i asked her why is she laughing , she said that am not gonna like her answer and proceeded to tell me that an ONS was better in bed than me, even said that she only had oral with him and it was so much better than all things we’ve done together in bed, she answered a question i didnt ask.

Its not a nice thing to say ,I feel now so turned off by this , and lost all of my attraction to her , even tho i have a high libido, i am considering break up but at the same time not sure if i should talk to her about it or just end it all?

Netizens’ comments

1. Wtf, break up. Only 2 months in and she’s waving a red flag under your nose. She specifically asked you that question so that she could say something cruel to you. Don’t let anyone treat you that way. I would never ever tell my man that someone was better than him in bed even if it were true.
   If she wanted you to improve on something in the bedroom there are much nicer ways to go about it.
2. Don’t take it as fact either, OP. Not only is everyone different, she intentionally took the conversation there. This was a planned insult, and by what you’ve described she was delighted to say it.
   If I were you I’d literally just call/text her, tell her to enjoy her ONS’, and remove her from your life. 2 months? You owe her nothing, and less than nothing after saying some stupid shit like that.
3. Who would ever say this to someone they’re dating?! Pure evil.
4. That’s messed up. She needs to know how hurtful that statement is. It sounds like she just doesn’t care.
   Personally, I’d suggest that she is more than welcome to date the ONS and be done with her. Life is too short to deal with that kind of bull crap

My boyfriend think that I should do things for him, if I want to f him ( deserving it ) this is red flag right ?

We’ve been together for a bit more than a year. And at first, everything was fine. We had a good relationship and everything was all good and fun in the bedroom. It was often and natural, wasn’t forced at all. We f whenever we were in the mood.

But recently ( this last month) he had been acting different, telling me that if I wanted to f him, I should deserve it.

Basically, I should do good things, good deeds ( just for him). Like, cooking diner, or compliment him, helping him with things when he asks me too, clean the house,…

He wasn’t like that at the beginning and I want to help or be nice to him, but I don’t want to do it, because I need to do it in order to get my satisfaction. I never had anyone telling me, I should deserve it if I wanted it.

I’m thinking of ending the relationship, because I’m scared it’s going to be worst and that he’s trying to turn me into his maid or his thing.

I just can’t recognise him. Was he being on his best behaviour at the beginning and showing his true self now ? I’m also embarrassed to talk about to relatives or close friends.

Netizens’ comments

1. You are correct. Using intimacy to control you is low. There can be such a thing as teasing and enticing you with a wild time as a form of appreciation and gratitude if you help with chores, and even then it’s something that needs to be agreed on by both parties.
   Using the word “deserving” and withholding intimacy is pure controlling attitude. Either call him out on it and see if he realizes he’s being out of hand or dump him if he doesn’t acknowledge his behavior
2. 100%. Take it from me – I had a FWB who wanted me to keep a log of food I ate and, if he approved of my diet, then I would be rewarded. Once he said that to me, I NOPED out of that one real fast.
3. In a relationship, you should both do things for one another to better each other and increase the total value of your union
4. Run sister.

When is it too soon to move in together? My (36m) gf (38f) asked me to move in?

So I (36m) met my gf(38f) two months ago. Things seemed to be on the fast track. We met online and on first day we exchanged numbers and set a date. The first date went very well and We clicked immediately. After the first date been spending a lot of time together.

For the last month we would spend six Nights a week together. It got to the point where I rarely sleep in my own bed.

She just moved into a new place and wants me to move in with her. I’m all in favor of it, I love her and ngl I’m very happy to reduce my expenses.

While we don’t have immediate plans on getting married. We both confessed that we see us spending rest of our lives together.

I have a good feeling but I just want to be sure I’m not rushing into anything.

Netizens’ comments

1. I would hazard a guess and say 2 months is definitely still too soon. Personally I wouldn’t consider it until at least a year of dating
2. You are still in the honey moon phase
   Nothing good will come from you moving in this quickly into a relationship
3. 2 months is too soon.
   You haven’t seen each other sick, stressed – hell, you haven’t even gone through a season together.
   Have you had a realistic convo about finances? Who pays for what? Who makes what? Credit, if that’s a thing where you live? Do either of you have kids? How is visitation handled? Family guests? Friends? Cleaning?
   Are you going to be a co-owner of the house? A renter? Legally, those are very different.
   What happens if in 6 months, you realize you actually didn’t know each other and you want to move out? Where do you go? Will you owe rent?
   Right now, you’re in a haze of hormones, lust and maybe love.
   Take a breath, let the haze clear, and have some hard talks.
4. Go on at least a one week trip together, preferably lower budget. That should give you a better clue.
   But aside from that, time wise it sounds short but it differs from couple to couple so …
5. It would be kind of fast IMO.
   Normally, I would suggest for couples to spend a year at minimal before they move in together. Really flush out their relationship and ensure there is a solid foundation in place.
   But, that is typically geared towards younger couples.
   I think a good test here would be… to see her reaction to your hesitation.
   If she understands that it might be fast and is willing to take it slow. Good sign. Don’t rush it, give it a couple more months then pull the trigger.
   If that conversation breaks the relationship, like she can’t handle the idea of taking it slow… Well… Probably a good indication that you’re walking into a trap.
   Keep in mind… People are always on their best behaviour in the early stages. You two only scratched the surface of each-other, still strangers in a sense. Better to be safe and gain some experience together… go through a couple of tests before you make a drastic decision like that.

How likely am I to be fired?

I was hired in an assistant role a few months ago. I had zero experience in this industry. Company decided to attach me to a senior guy for two months before moving me to another project.

Client for my current project actually asked my company for a guy with >4 years of experience, but my company couldn’t provide anyone else but me as everyone else is busy with their own project(s).

The industry I’m in is considered low SES by most Singaporeans and even some of my friends have make fun of it.

Due to this, many employees have resigned ever since the Covid restrictions relaxed and my company has difficulties hiring ever since. There wasn’t even any one in my company that was an executive role that have more than 4 years of experience.

Client decides to relent as they had good prior experiences with my company from their past working experiences together.

Back to my working conditions, So anyway I am basically almost soloing the whole project that was worth 1 million plus.

My manager is situated most at HQ and I am alone at the site office almost every day. I would call him for help with problems that I face every day but he usually said he would get back to me but he forgets due to his workload. Sometimes I forget to chase him for it too.

Now, the client has hinted that I am not performing up to his standard and might terminate the contract with my company.

So, in your opinion, how likely am I to be fired if I lose this million dollar contract for my company? I am asking because if it is very likely, then I would rather resign on my own than to have the dismissal on my resume.