My friend had a shotgun marriage, she was pregnant after a one night stand. Even though they are staying together as husband and wife, they do not interfere in each other’s personal life.

she got hooked onto dating apps and has been chatting with guys on the internet. She did not want guys coming to her house to complicate things so her “flings” were all from other countries.

Due to her good looks, she can have like 8 guys chatting with her at the same time and she did not think that having such “long distance relationships” are considered cheating because they are just purely chatting on the phone and there are not getting physical, at least in person.

To my horror (?!) she told me that she is actually on a mission – to collect guys of all 12 horoscopes and 12 zodiac!!!! she even had a private IG account to post screenshots of all the mushy messages from her “collection”.

To her, she felt that she is already tied down with a kid and most likely she will

Netizens’ comments

1. No, i dont have friends like that. So by having all the zodiacs, then she can unlock something like a medal as a bonus or what?
2. anyway, maybe it’s not abt feeling loved alr. it’s abt the diff types of guys she collects, like horoscopes and zodiac. they’re like trophies.
3. Envy her for having a delusional love life? LOL! Then you’ll need to rethink what you’re doing with your life.
4. She collect all 12 already then get what? unlock premium content or government going to give her an accomplishment medal?
5. Dont be envious. Wait for her ending. Her story not over yet…
6. At least she is not collecting a manjong table or poker cards.
7. Nope what’s there to envious about? Her increased chances of getting an STD?

A netizen on LinkedIn said that it is “very hard” for her to live in Singapore because “HDB people” are allowed to work in private residential areas.

She said that it is necessary to limit contact with them otherwise she will lose her “unique identity”, which she says the “HDB people” have lost.

She said that people in the rich areas have their own identity and are different because they have a different “outlook on community building”.

The OP added that the “HDB people” only care about money and not values, and they sit and wait to be told what to do.

Here is what she said

It’s very hard for me to live in Singapore because the govt allows HDB people to take jobs in private residential areas. Which means they don’t just visit, they remain for about 6-8hours a day. And that’s a lot. So it is necessary to limit contact with them less I lose #uniqueidentity as most of them have. But they did it by choice, most of them.

It is time to accept, for the large part, HDB people and private residence people are very different because of our outlook on community building.

Private residence, we build according to values and mindset, we ignore race, language and religion and prioritise mental acuity and emotional stability. We don’t wait to live life, we live now. We show our values and our humanity in how we work, play and hire.

In HDB, it is simply about networks and rules that the govt can give them, and they sit and wait for those, and until then they group according to age, race and marital status. It tells us nothing of their values nor their humanity. They are about money, not values.

Happiness is not about humanity. Humanity is about humanity.

Stranger from overseas grabbed my hand while jogging.. followed me to my building.. need opinion and help.

I’m not sure if this is the place to ask this but because it happened in SG I might as well. Some stuff about me is that I am scared of talking to new people, anxious, very shy and I have confidence issues. I just feel so bad about myself to the point where I rarely go out because I don’t like being in public and being seen in general..

Last week I went jogging because I wanted to improve on myself. I was doing a warm up exercise when this stranger slowly walked past me, slowing his pace staring at me while smiling very widely.. it felt creepy..?

I was so creeped out and I panicked, took out my earpiece to asked is there something wrong with me.From his accent I know that he was from China.

In short he said along the lines of “i look very sunny & friendly? (idk how to translate man, it was in mandarin)” and “seeing me jog makes him want to jog too” that’s why he was staring.. weird.. then asked if I wanted to jog together with him, which I was panicking and I awkwardly did a nervous laugh and said ok because I didn’t want to be rude and I find it very hard to say no to people.. I texted my husband to tell him that I was scared that this person is talking to me.

Before you all ask “why did you do that?? why did you say ok??” well my remaining braincell was panicking so hard that it didn’t know what to do so.. I screwed up yeah.. I was scared and panicking..

After that he went to change his slippers and joined me in jogging. Some points I want to point out during the jogging:

• He wanted to take my phone and put it on his smartphone armband saying that it’s harder to jog when its heavy and in my pocket.. which i declined immediately multiple times because he was insisting..
• He pointed out that there was something on my face and proceeded to use his hands to touch my face (i froze up and didn’t move because i was scared)
• He wanted to go jog another route instead of the one populated with people and said something like “it gets nauseating if you keep jogging in this small area, let’s go outside this park and jog around the neighborhood” which after that I found out was pretty.. isolated.. ulu you know.
• My shoelace came off and I was trying to tie it back but he kept insisting on helping me tie my shoelace when I repeatedly said no.. I’m not sure if I should feel creeped out by this.

At one point I ran out of breath and told him to slow down and walk. This is when he said he had an idea and HE GRABBED MY HAND and tried to pull me while he was jogging in front of me, WHICH I QUICKLY YANKED MY HAND AWAY.

I was full on panicking in my brain right now and was extremely scared because I was thinking “do strangers do this with people they met for less than 10mins?? is this harassment?? what do I do, I’m afraid he’ll grab my hand again” all while nervously laughing and told him to continue jogging so he won’t grab my hand again.. at this point we’re fairly out of the park now when my mom (thank GOD for good timing) called me and asked “WHY ARE YOU RUNNING WITH A STRANGER COME BACK NOW”.

We live at a high floor HDB and she was watching me jog when she noticed this stranger and me walking off with him. My husband also called me and was like “Are you ok? do you need help? I can come over” which I told him I’m heading back home and will call him later”.

I turned to him and was like “WELP MY MOM NEEDS MY HELP WITH SOMETHING AND I REAAALLLY NEEDA HURRY BACK HOME” which he was like “ok..” .. then we headed back where we started..

This guy would NOT let me go.. I told him that we can part ways in the park and he insist on walking me to my building.. red flag or overly friendly? I’m not sure. He asked for my number asking to be friends and to jog together but I declined. At this point I just want to go home and hide under my blanket.. so I hurried and said bye.

As he was going away, I saw him turn around and walking towards me in my peripheral vision and shouting “sis let me bring you up to your home!” WHICH I QUICKLY PRETENDED NOT TO HEAR and husband also called me at this timing and I picked up the phone to talk and hurried away.. once I confirmed that he wasn’t near or looking, I took the lift up to my home.

As I sat down and thought about it, I was so stunned and shocked. I kept berating myself like “why did you do that?” Friends told me to report to the police because this is considered harassment, but I wasn’t sure if the guy was just over friendly?? Is this something that is normal in his home country? What if the police don’t take me seriously? I’m really not sure.. I’m feeling really bad about myself after this because I feel like it’s my fault for agreeing and being scared to say no..

even when I try to recount the incident to my brother & husband they just keep saying “why did u do this, why did u do that??” I know its common sense to say no and ignore strangers but please.. I was panicking and scared that there’s no more common sense.. I’m on the verge of tears because I felt that they don’t understand what I went through. My brother also said I was stupid instead of giving me any good advice.. so I stopped trying to ask him for any opinion. Thanks bro, really helpful. I’ve also since explained further to my husband and he understood i was scared and have been walking me home.

I just felt like even if I went to lodge a police report they won’t take me seriously and will just blame me instead. I don’t know what to do. I’ve been feeling a bit scared to go out and potentially see that person again since he said that he lives around the corner as well. What if he could stalk me, since he knows I live around there as well? I don’t even know if I have the rights to feel depressed about this or I am being overdramatic.

Am I overreacting? Is it wrong for me to think about all these? Am I just stupid? Should I report to the police? What if I wrongfully reported them? Is this just something normal that people do in his country? What if the police blames me? I’m scared and just need help and advice.. and just opinions from fellow Singaporeans..

Edit: Hi all, thank you so much for your comments. I tried to lodge a e-report for the past 30mins but somehow the system is having some issues. So I will go down to the police station tomorrow morning to report. Thank you all for telling me to lodge a report, I now realized that he could’ve tried this on other people as well and could be dangerous. Thank you all for knocking some sense into me.

My boyfriend gets frustrated with me when we get intimate and I feel like I’m taking it too personally. It has happened twice now.

Basically when we are doing it from the back, he pushes me slightly forward and I lean forward because he isnt really holding my hips. He gets frustrated because it’s not comfortable for him if I’m leaning forward too much but in the moment I’m not really aware that I’m doing it.

Regardless of the actual reason why he is upset, he reacts very suddenly and makes “TSK” sounds and exhales loudly (expressing frustration) and the first time he actually raised his voice at me and told me “Move over, oh my god” which made me cry.

I’m very sensitive, I know that. He isn’t violent. He just gets frustrated easily and that’s a huge turnoff for me.

Last night he made a “TSK” sound and exhaled loudly again. He wanted me to finish and started using his fingers on me. I told him I was close and to put it back in and he was trying but he had gone soft (I guess he was bored/tired of fingering and he exhaled during that as well, as if he was annoyed)

He couldn’t put it in and I leaned forward a bit, then he just got frustrated and I just straight up got up and told him it’s not gonna work for me.

He says it’s just him being “direct” and acting in the moment. I didn’t care, I told him I can’t enjoy it if he keeps doing this. I told him if I’m leaning, then to just pull my hips back and don’t make frustrated noises as it just kills my mood and frankly hurts my feelings and I think it’s inconsiderate.

He didn’t apologise and we didn’t speak the rest of the evening. Now I don’t want to sleep with him at all.

I’ve posted about the first time this happened and I’ve been trying to resolve the issue with him but it happened again.

I feel like he’s too focused on making me finish and doesn’t really know how to. I’ve told him all the things that I like and he doesn’t do them. He just resorts to penetration. Anyway that’s besides the point. Is this a big deal, has anyone dealt with something similar? How do I proceed?

I (28F) am getting less and less attracted to my obese boyfriend (30M)

My boyfriend (30) and I (28) have been dating for about 5 months now. It likely would have ended a few weeks in had I not gotten pregnant by him but here we are.

Abortion is not an option for me. I am doing everything I can to try to make it work, because I don’t want to be a single parent.

He is about 150kg. I knew this before ever sleeping with him or dating him. But now it is really starting to bother me for a lot of reasons.

I get so embarrassed in public and I feel like people stare at us. I don’t like when he shows me any affection in front of people.

I haven’t introduced him to a lot of my family or posted much of him on my social media pages because I am embarrassed by his weight.

He snores so loud that I can’t even sleep in the same room as him. He’s a really messy eater and watching him eat disgusts me.

He says he wants to lose weight and get healthy but it seems like the pattern has been that he will diet and do well for a few days and give up.

I try to be as supportive as I can be, but I’m starting to feel like it’s something I can’t look past. It makes me angry that he says he wants to lose weight and then doesn’t take much action to change his lifestyle.

I feel like such a bad person for being so repulsed by him and it feels like I’m being shallow. I haven’t been wanting to sleep with him because of how unappealing he’s been to me lately.

I worry about his health a lot. I also worry that he won’t be a good enough parent. I don’t want my child to grow up thinking it’s normal or acceptable to be obese. I also don’t think he would be able to keep up with a young toddler running around.

He also has recently shown me that he has a very grumpy/negative outlook on life and I’m the complete opposite of that.

I am just not sure if I should even try to continue this relationship anymore, because I feel like he deserves to be with someone who truly loves him as he is but again, I’m terrified of being a single mom. I wish I could look past it but I don’t know how. I need advice.

Should I stay in this relationship for the baby, or should I leave?

Everything is getting more expensive, wages are staying the same. I’m 24 and life feels impossible. Wtf do I do

I dropped out of my private degree, now I have loan debt crushing me at all times. And groceries, rent EVERYTHING is getting more expensive and I haven’t had a raise in over a year. I barely make enough to live.

After I get paid and pay my bills and necessities I might have like $20 left. This job is the best pay I’ve ever gotten and it still sucks, and I’m not qualified for anything else.

Life seems impossible, Gen X had the last chance at a decent life and the rest of us are screwed unless your parents can bankroll you, which mine certainly can’t. I don’t even talk to my family.

This is too hard and I wanna quit. I can’t keep living like this for 5-6 more decades just miserable 24/7 and only here because I am, because my parents couldn’t pull out

Netizens’ comments

1. I hear you brother. Home prices are sailing away from me at a speed that I don’t think I can catch up to. Not sure how anyone keeps up anymore. No wonder the birth rate is declining
2. i feel this so hard bro :/ my whole family is upper middle class and then there’s me who is doing deliveries to pay my bills and living off cup noodles. they all turned their back on me because i went against them once.
   i have cc debt and huge student loan debt. feels like even if i work forever i will never be able to relax. you’re not alone. i see you and i’m rooting for you
3. I feel you on that, I recently moved in with my mom and let me tell you, things aren’t easy. Me, my sister, and my mom are working and still couldn’t make enough for groceries and other expenses.
4. I’m 35 and I feel ya. Hell, life just feels exhausting and doing this for another 50 years sounds like torture. I’m hoping I can figure something out cause I’m making the same as you, and can barely afford to live

My boyfriend just told me he is gay and broke up with me

When we met about two years ago, he told me he was bi. I am also bi and I was just so happy to meet someone like me.

I fell in love with him and we got together in october of that year. We said things like “this feels too good to be true” and how we wanted to get married some time in the near future.

Last July we move in together and I asked himself a million times if this is what he wanted. I wanted to be sure because I knew that’s what I wanted.

He held me through so many hard nights, took care of me during my sprained ankle. We fantasized about our wedding.

He went to visit family this weekend and when he came home we were supposed to talk about if we wanted to move closer to my family. Instead- he tells me he is gay and can only see himself with a man in the future.

My whole world, my whole life i thought i had is gone. He kissed me on Friday – and now I am single.

I don’t know what to do – I am heartbroken and just feel like my life has been a lie. The devoted, caring, kind loving man I loved – he wasn’t real.

He left the house and hasn’t taken my call or my texts. I am just broken.

Netizens’ comments

1.  it’s better to find out now than later. Heart break is terrible and there is never a good time. But he did you a favor. He probably been wrestling with this and the move pushed him to finally let you know. You will grieve and find a way to move on.
2. I have been where you are. We weren’t living together, but we had been together for over 5 years. When we got together, I knew he was bi and had dated men before. But I believed that he loved me and wanted to make a life together. I don’t remember exactly when he started pulling away, but I remember how it felt. And I remember when he told me that he realized he was lent just bi and that he was gay.
   It hurt. Like hell. I don’t remember how long it was before we started talking again. We may have never really stopped texting. But it was several months before I could bring myself to see him again. It still hurt, and it did for a long time. But eventually, it stopped hurting. We became friends. Now he’s one of my best friends. But it took a lot to get where we are now. You may not have the same ending that I did, but I told my story to let you know that it will be ok and you will get over it.