To admin, please post this, I need help. Basically, I have a pcc-ing problem.

I pcc like everyday. Used to be like 3 times a day. Now cause I’m working, it’s at least 2 times. Morning once, night once. I think my issues about this gets even worse.

Everyday I think, should I pcc now or later? If it’s later, would I have time to pcck though? If no time, I’ll just pcc now. But, sometimes, I chose later, only to find out that I have no time to pcc at all. That makes me sad. And when I’m sad, I just pcc it out anyways, so it’s still a win win..I guess?

Today, I just realized I haven’t pcc yesterday at all. I’m not sure why, that makes me sad. It’s as if I broke the pcc-king chain. Then I started to think, I need to stop pcc-ing. But, I’m not sure how to stop pcc-ing. Everytime I think about stopping, I be like, oh well, one last pcc, and I pcc it away, and feel like a failure cause I pcc-ed, but at the same time, it felt great.

But this only makes me wanna pcc more. Then I’m like, I really need to decide the best time to stop the pcc, but how? Oh well, I guess I’ll decide it by pcc-ing. And so I pcc-ed it away yet again, and make no decision whatsoever after that. And so I’m sad, and pcc it off again.

As I’m typing this, I’m thinking, should I pcc now or just stop the pcc once and for all. Eh, I’ll probably pcc anyways.

Yup, I need help.

So I am working as a waitress and server at a cafe/pub and my shifts usually start at about 7 in the evening until 3 am in the morning.

I am always taking Grab to work then again when work ends, main reason for this is to avoid the peak hour crowds and also at 3am, there are no more public transport.

I live somewhere in the West and my Grab rides to work cost about $30 plus, and by the time I end work, I’m usually drunk and it’s about 3am and there’s no more public transport and I have no choice but to take Grab home.

For context, I work at a pub and my job included serving, cashiering and drinking with the customers. And no I am not a hostess, my job scope just includes entertaining them and I get extra money if they buy me ladies drinks. I also don’t provide any “services”, it’s a legit and honest job.

And a lot of people are asking why I don’t have travel allowance from my workplace since I end work so late, and my employers tell me that they don’t give me travel allowance in exchange for 100% of the money from ladies drinks and a higher commission rate.

So basically i get more money, in a way.

Anyway, so taking Grab to and from work, each day I spend about $60++, and when I add up all the money that I spend on Grab every day, it totals to about $1.2k per month.

I am earning about $3k++ so almost half of it is spent on Grab rides.

Netizens’ commetns

Yes, I think can take public transport to work. Assuming she works in town areas, public transport from west side towards town should be still OK. The big crowds during evening peaks are usually from town to heartlands.

Walao public transport so bad meh… I take it everyday leh.

That should be the way. Better than squeezing like sardine in public transport.

I would rather purchase a bike with that amount of money, which im already a rider. Convenient and affordable 

I just turned 21 years old earlier this year, and thought that my life would finally become better for me but then my whole world came crashing down on me.

I have always been living with my father, the two of us were borrowing a room from our relatives. It was crammed but we lived there for about a good 10+ years, since I was in primary school.

My parents were divorced, I don’t really keep in contact with my mom anymore. The reason me and my dad didn’t apply for a rental flat was because my mom used my name to rent a flat and she stayed with her new boyfriend.

Life was pretty comfortable. Me and my father got so used to living in our relative’s home. My PC setup was a small coffee table propped right in front of my mattress, as soon as I wake up I was already in gaming position. Anyway we just stayed there until when I was nearing the end of my poly years, that’s when my relative told us we need to find a way to move out.

As every Singaporean would know, getting a property in Singapore is like a really huge milestone. I don’t know how me and my father are going to pull it off, so we came up with a plan.

Instead of wasting 2 years in NS, I decided to sign on and landed my self a nice $2.9k vocation (Of cause I didn’t make this decision lightly, I have weighted many factors in, including which vocation would suit me best). Now that I have stable income, we should be able to get a decent loan from HDB or bank. Together with my father’s 80k in his CPF OA, we just might be able to get a BTO or SBF.

That’s when I learnt that my father had deferred a HDB loan a long time ago, back in 1997. The interest has accumulated until a good 200k+. HDB was kind enough to waiver off half of this resale levy, but its still over 100k. Okay fine, how about public resale? We went back to crunching numbers and smashing calculators. My father has already applied for HLE twice so HDB loan is out of the question, we went down to DBS bank to ask for a loan, and after assessing me and my father’s situation, we learnt that instead of the expected 170k we could loan for 25 year tenure, we could only get 100k+ due to my father’s income and age.

Forget about getting resale, we couldn’t even pay the upfront cost for the cheapest options out there, and we haven’t even factor in the COV yet. I have only started working for a few months so I don’t have much savings as well yet.

So we went back to try and apply for a rental flat, and HDB rejected us because our combined income exceeds 1.5k.

A few days ago my relative gave me and my father a deadline to move out. I have already wrote a letter to MP to try and help us out with our situation, and am still currently waiting for reply.

I have also applied and got accepted for a part-time degree program. I am awaiting payment of school fees and have set aside 16k so that’s even less savings for housing.

With increasing property price the trend, plus the pandemic, BTO delay, etc, I feel I got caught in a really bad timing. I admit some of the issues I’m facing is due to our poor decision making in the past, even way before I was born. There is still a lot of things I don’t know about the world but with the decisions I need to make, I can’t help but feel overwhelmed.

If HDB rejects us again, we may have to look for a private rental. But honestly the reality of working just to pay rent and continue cramming in a single room, and we don’t even know what kind of restrictions the landlord might impose on us. Things seem to be turning for the worse, and if my salary goes to paying rent, how can we break out of the cycle?

I am thinking of asking my father to stop working so that our combined salary is just nice below 1.5k. We will have to wait until our next reporting of income tax statement. I don’t know how well this plan might work or if it might backfire on us.

Currently looking out for private rentals while awaiting HDB response, I don’t have any experience with this so I may contact an agent. If anybody has experience with this I would really appreciate it if you can share your knowledge. I heard there are some rental offers out there that are out to scam foreigners, there was a story about a flat that rented out to like 10+ people.

A man shared how he is a widowers and his daughter recently caught him sleeping with his date and now refuses to talk to him.

Here is the story

My daughter won’t talk to me. And I don’t know what to do.

Her mom and I were school sweethearts and had her young. We lost my wife over 2 years ago to cancer. Ever since it’s been me and her. We have both gone to therapy since it happened to cope with the grief. I was especially destroyed by it, she was the love of my life.

When I met my coworker “Maya” I didn’t expect to develop feelings. For the past 4 months we’ve worked together I just did. She knows about my history with my wife. And she’s been pretty respectful about it. Finally over a month ago I asked her out on a date, she said yes. I didn’t tell my daughter about any of this because I wasn’t ready to admit to her that I’m interested in someone else. Figured to date a while and if I felt it was really gonna go somewhere then find the right time to tell her.

This weekend my daughter was gonna be with her best friend’s family to celebrate her birthday at their home. She was meant to stay there until Monday morning. So thinking that I’d be free, Maya and I went out on our 3rd date. At the end of it we got pretty caught up in the kissing. We just wanted to be together.

And my place was the closest. We got intimate last night and fell asleep. My daughter showed up wayyy sooner than expected. Her work asked her to cover a shift on Monday so she decided to drive back early before Sunday traffic hit. She found us asleep together and lost it. When we talked after Maya left she accused me of not caring about my wife and she’s disgusted I’d move on so easily. I know what she’s saying is coming from her grief.

I tried talking getting through to her. She didn’t want to hear it though. All day today she’s been ignoring me. This is killing me. I can’t lose my daughter too and I don’t know what to do to make this situation better. What can I do for her to make this easier? This isn’t how I wanted her to find out about this

For some reasons (undisclosed here) , I may be incomeless for a few years. i have about 200K savings, staying in my parent home but i gave them a lump sum of 50K at one shot. told them is for next few years of me being jobless( not that i want)

Should not have any expenses since i would not go out at all! So maybe phone bill cost $30 per month and insurance which i should have enough saving to tank for five years of payment.

Anyone similar situation to me? So my question is has anyone also incomeless for a few years? So when u get back to salaryman – how did u cope. And what u do when u are incomeless and mental wise all ok? Asking for reference and mental preparation

Netizens’ comments

• Might want to have a plan? Like what you intend to do during these few years.
  Last time I had a friend who did that, left the company and took a break for a few years, then back in, after a few years,she quit again but was feeling restless at home so she got a job which is different from her previous job, which also means she will start at the bottom but get to learn new stuff and she doesn’t mind since she has the financial means to do so.
  My mum was let go after her boss sold the company but like my dad said “her backside got nails, cannot sit at home one” , so instead of retiring, she went out to find a new job.
  Depending on your industry, you might have to play some catch up after the break to get back on track with the newer technology etc.
• Here’s sharing my experience: I took an unplanned and unintended career break due to illness, from approx 2016 to 2021. I can’t really put a finger down to the number of years I stopped work, cos I had stepped down my employment gradually from FTE to part-time, to self-employed, then freelance, until my health required me to stop working totally.
  When my health got better in late 2020, I started reading up on how to re-enter the workforce/restart my career after a break. Honestly, despite all the hell that the pandemic caused, there were two good things that came out of it that benefitted me:
  The SGUnited heavily subsidised training/skills/mid-career programmes that came with monthly training allowance. I personally took a 9-mths long SGUS prog in digital HR to brush up my rusty skills and make myself more relevant to today’s needs, and also got to upskill in the newer tech skill
  WFH corporate jobs were previously rare in Sg, but companies were forced to make it happen and now some of them have realised the good in a hybrid workforce. Though it’s still too soon to say for sure, we will have to see how things go after Apr 26.
  And remote/hybrid work arrangements were what I really needed so as to manage my energy output better to avoid crashes/relapses. I have since started working in Feb 2022, although in a lower role but getting to restart is of more importance.
  In terms of finances I can’t really offer much advice given that I actually had to turn to family for help ultimately cos the medical expenses plus not working expended all of my savings. But the break also forced me to cut my monthly bills to only what is most essential, and I realised that a lot of the expenses that I thought were important or necessary may not actually be. So it’s important to rank your expenses I think, and perhaps as you go along your break, you can slowly cut away those things that you can do without.
  Finally, to end this off, I can’t emphasise enough that HEALTH IS WEALTH. Please take care of yourselves first and foremost, be it physically, mentally, emotionally. No matter how much you slog for any company, or offer your time and money to any religion, or bend over backwards to cater to your friends/network/etc, when disaster hits, not all of them will be willing to stay with you to ride it out and give a helping hand. But I also don’t regret or blame the higher being for having to go through what I did, cos the “social cleansing” really helped me to now know who are my important people (honestly many of those whom I thought would be in this group ended up taking flight but it’s okay, good riddance to them).

I am currently working as an intern at a certain e commerce company here which I shall not name, I am supposed to work here until the year end and I am dreading going into work almost every day.

It is not that my superiors are nasty. They are friendly and teach me stuff. However because most of the employees are not Singaporean, the work culture is quite different, even the way they treat Singaporeans is also different.

They only care about their fellow countrymen, so if the team consists of people from different backgrounds, the team will not be bonded. It is quite obvious that they are only friendly with each other for work relations.

Recently a new full timer joined my team. He is also from that country. As such, he is treated extremely well. He was given a tour around the office and they even treated him lunch.

Back when I joined, there was no such treatment lol. But I guess it is because I am a temporary staff there is no need to treat me that well. I am fine with that.

However, my supervisor has been assigning work that was meant for me, to him. Hence ever since he joined my workload has become significantly less and I don’t learn as much anymore.

I am also kept out of the loop for projects that I used to be part of, and he has replaced me. My supervisor even asked me to give him my script which I spent 1 entire month working on, so that he can take over my duties.

Now I dread going to work because I want to be busy and learn things but now I cannot because everything has been passed to this new guy.

Maybe my supervisor finds it easier to communicate with someone of similar background as her, so she stopped giving me important tasks and instead gave them to him.

It has come to the point where every day I have to ask for work because I have nothing to do. But the work assigned to me is extremely mundane.

I miss the days before this new full timer joined. I really don’t know how I am going to handle the next few months in this team.

Netizen’s comment

Do not overthink. From your perspective, it appeared that they are giving you less work and make you less important.

Take note that you are not a perm staff and will leave the company in a few months. From the company perspective, they have to plan the handover of your tasks to the perm staff. This is a normal hand over plan.

You may take this as a learning point as an intern. One day if you become the boss of the company, you will do likewise, by transferring the tasks to a perm staff before the intern leave. Your asking is valid as you have yet to see the world.