Spiraled into credit card debt due to unethical pushy businesses

I’m in debt, but not because of someone else.. It’s because of my naive self. Last year I signed up for a credit card and was so excited to use it, I was confident in repaying my bills and I repaid them on time for the first few months. I started making bigger purchases (furniture at IKEA, furnitures online etc) as I needed new chairs/bed/table for my house which just underwent a renovation.

Slowly, the bills started to rack up but I could still pay them off. The breaking point was when I entered a nail outlet to go for a quick manicure as I saw that they were having promotion ($20 for express gel).

As I am a gentle person who finds it hard to say no, I found myself spiralling into debt as the nail technicians kept pushing packages, spas and treatments onto me. (AND everytime I went back for another appointment, they hardsell me and literally profit off me every appointment)

It was to a point that I was dreading my every appointment. They would tell me pity stories of their families in Malaysia, and treat me like a “close friend” and “special customer”, giving me discounts and freebies whenever I say no. I know that it is their tactic but I really can’t say no..

From a $20 quick express manicure session to signing packages which costed over $3~$4k, I really hated amd questioned myself why did I even step into Nai* Palac* in the first place.

Another incident which happened in the same period: I had listened to a radio during a grab ride, and the host was talking about a quick quiz to win a free facial. As it was free, I decided to just send sms to try my luck. Within 1 day, a sales associate whatsapped me, saying tjat I had won the radio giveaway. I was surprised but happy, and I asked if there was any costs, to which the staff answered that *it is FULLY FREE from the radio*

Fast forward time, staff hard sell me during consultation, during the facial, after the facial, and even when I told them I had no money, they asked me how much money I had in my bank account and that they will give me a special price for lower amount of sessions.

Even mentioned that they don’t usually do this for anyone. In the end I caved, and ended up in even more debt.

I quarreled and argued with my boyfriend, family and friends over all these and felt damn shitty.

And because banks charge a late interest fee on credit cards, and I was unable to fully repay in one shot, the bill and interest kept snowballing. I am now working a full time job and part time job, (44 hours + 16 hours), and I am tired.

Singapore should crack down all these unethical shops who prey on people like me who are soft hearted and hard to say no. Feel so terrible about my financial situation now, and I can’t even blame anyone except for myself.

I have been job searching since I lost my job a month ago (they filed for bankruptcy). Prior to me losing my job, I had been working for 5 years through the company. My husband didnt work. He would have a job for a month before quitting and staying home.

I didnt say anything because he was there to take care of my kids and I didnt have to pay for daycare. So in the long run it did save me almost $650.

He had many “reasons” for being unemployed. He was severely depressed. For a while he was in denial about it but I was finally able to convince him to get into therapy. He also had untreated ADHD so he was sound sensitive, light sensitive and angered easily from overstimulation.

He could not hold a job down to save his life and would quit before giving it a chance. So I paid the bills for absolutely everything for 5 years. Whenever I did bring up him getting a job he would say “we really cant afford daycare”- which he wasnt wrong. It was expensive.

Me and a new girlfriend have been going out for a few months and things have been better than great. We get on so well, same dark humour, same response to nearly all situations, everything we do compliment each other, etc.

A girl recently shared her story online about how having a boyfriend is like being a free chauffeur.

The post was quickly targetted by netizens and soon removed.

Here is what the post said:

Men are men, they are supposed to be gentlemen and send girls home and buy us meals.

So my ex-boyfriend did not have a car but he always send me home via taxi and always buy me meals. With the money, I save on buying meals I am saving an additional $20-$30 every time we meet.

That like saving at least $240 a month plus the free taxi rides home I saved another several hundred.

So my friend was telling me my mindset is wrong and that I should not be using guys as a tool to free stuff. But I greatly disagree.

Many people often talk about gender equality for women but they are just not using the tools they have and complain all day about equality.

Equality is something you fight for and not something you ask for.

So many men will always treat it as a norm for them to treat and I take complete advantage of them.

My current boyfriend is even better, he drives a car and brings me to everywhere I want meaning I save even more money as I do not have to take an MRT to meet him, he will always come to fetch me and sometimes even send me home after work.

Nothing is better than the word FREE, free chauffeur and free dinner. Eventually, I want to find a boyfriend or husband that can afford his own place and I get a free home.

This way I save about an extra $1,000 a month by making men dance on the palm of my hand. With that extra $1,000 I save I can use it to invest or buy some savings insurance or etc.

To the girls out there, if you are not making use of the men that like you then don’t be dumb. Being a queen is better than being a peasant.

A man shared a story about how he spent his younger years at Geylang and later realise that he has a softer side for a harder end.

After meeting his boyfriend he changed his career and became a working citizen.

Here is the story:

I used to drink daily at Geylang Lorong 14, we used to sleep all day and party all night. Whenever there are problems in the pub our group would dash forward and “settle” the problem straight away.

Like most guys that go Geylang we go fish tanks and have our fair share of the fun.

But it was until one night I got drunk at Clark Quay and met a person who changed my destiny.

I met a guy who works in a bank, he was a very nice person and we became good friends quickly, he often remind me to stay away from my Geylang clique and told me to think about the future.

After months of him telling me to do the right thing, I finally gave in and he introduced me to a job at a financial firm as a loan officer.

When I was working as a loan officer and I see people from many different backgrounds. I quickly realised that the most common background is those people who were like me during the “Geylang Days”.

I quickly realised and see the potential of a proper job as I do not want to be those people that are seeking loans here and there.

After working for a few months I realised what my friend had told me was so right and true and I no longer joined my Geylang clique and worked hard as the loan officer.

I asked him out and treat him for a drink as a kind of repayment, it was until we got drunk then I realised that I am actually not straight but bi.

We eventually got together and we are staying together in a condominium.

With my knowledge as a loan officer and my other half as a banker, we quickly secured financial freedom and we will be flying over to the USA soon to tie the knot.

My parents were open-minded and said that as long as Im happy and no longer go back to my ah beng days they are fine.