For some reason my son cannot wipe properly. This was never a concern to me as his mom did the laundry.

Unfortunately she is sick right now so I have taken over the household chores that she used to handle. My son is still responsible for his and I do mine as well as hers.

First day I did laundry I gagged and almost puked from his underwear. If he were three and not toilet trained I might understand how they end up like this. But he is a healthy young man. He should not be this unwiped.

I talked to him about it and he said he would make an effort to do a better job. Nope. No change in the situation.

So I went a bidet in the toilet. We already have one in our master bedroom. I told him that he has a choice of either using the bidet or washing his own underwear. He doesn’t know how to use the washing machine and he refuses to do them by hand.

He started going commando. Which just meant the problem was his jeans now.

So I said that we might need to take him to the doctor to see what is wrong with him. If it’s physical or psychological.

I also said that the next time his friends were over I was going to ask them is they left their underwear in the same condition. I WOULD NEVER ACTUALLY EMBARRASS HIM LIKE THAT.

He said I was being an a-hole and he called his mom to tell her what I was doing. She said that he was just like that and I could deal with it until she was better.

I don’t think that’s a great plan. If this kid never learns to clean properly he will suffer when he’s older.

He has started using the bidet but he says that it is gross and weird. I said it was grosser and weirder for a young man to crap his pants every day.

My online date got me pregnant

I know, I know, tale as old as time. I (29F) went out with a guy (33M) I’d been talking to online for about a week prior.

We went out Friday night, hit it off, then went out Saturday and Sunday too. We made it official on the third date, then he got sick and I didn’t see him for a week.

Being apart was torture, but then he came over to my place for a fourth and fifth date when he was better. We hooked up on maybe the sixth date, even though we said we wanted to wait.

By this time we were already saying “I love you” and talking about the future. We both saw ourselves together and were (and still are) very passionately in love.

We slept together many times since and never used protection mostly because he was under the impression he was either infertile.

Flash forward a month and my period is several days late. Mostly as a joke I bought a pregnancy test, and it’s positive.

I took 3 more and they’re all positive. We’re both very excited, terrified, and overwhelmed. At this point we haven’t even met each other’s complete families, so we’re keeping it a secret for now.

I feel like I’m going to explode from having to keep this secret, so I’m getting it off my chest here. Even if no one reads this, at least I’ve been able to say it.

I can’t believe this person was a stranger to me just six weeks ago, and now we’re going to be parents.

Netizens’ comments

• For the younger people reading this. Everything about this is a textbook on what not to do in dating.
• You’ve known him a few weeks and are now having his baby?
• Do other ppl also think its insane that ppl fall passionately in love after 6 dates or am I just crazy?
• I hate to be a downer, but basically, you went bareback – with a stranger – who may have effectively baby trapped you? Granted I know this happens all the time, but I guess I’m still surprised that a person (guy or girl, better both should use) doesn’t use birth control until their relationship is long past the 6th date period. I’m going to leave the rest of my thoughts to myself I think on this one.

Let me preface by saying that I was raised overseas, and i’m ignorant about how important face might be to Chinese Singaporeans.

At a recent CNY gathering, the host was taking his role too far IMO. Here are some things that happened.

The host’s daughter had asked a cousin if he wanted beer, to which he replied NO as he was closely watching his diet. No big deal, she just left it as that and got him some warm water. Her father then walked by and saw that he was drinking water and not beer. He then exclaimed loudly, “Why didn’t anybody offer him beer?” Daughter responded, “I already asked. He said he is watching his diet.” But the host replied, “You asked him, he said No. If I ask, he would say Yes.” He then repeatedly waved the cousin’s objection away and shoved a beer in his hand. After some ridiculous back and forth, the cousin politely accepted the beer, then placed it on the table and never opened it.

There was a family with a young boy who was leaving. As they were leaving, the boy swiped a little CNY snack from the coffee table. The boy’s mum told him to put it back as he was already starting to cough and she threatened to cane him once they got home if he didn’t. The host then grabs the CNY snack and handed a handful to the boy. “Eat more! Eat more! Don’t worry, take as much as you want.” to which the frantic mother said “No no no!! Cannot cannot!” But of course the boy was already holding on to a handful of snacks and quite confused as to what he should do. They left with the snacks, but I’m guessing the mother wasn’t too happy.

My dad had a heart-related operation a couple of months back. In the past, he was a fairly heavy drinker, but after his op he quit all drinking. The host knows this. Yet the host offered my dad China’s Baijiu, which was 40+% in alcohol. The host’s family jumped in and told him to stop this nonsense, and reminded him of the op my dad just had, but the host waved them all away and said “You all don’t know our customs!” My dad said no a few times but the host was insistent and this was starting to become quite a scene, so my dad decided to just drink 1 tiny shot glass of baijiu to appease him. The host became super smug, and at this point i was fuming.

That was when the tables turned. One of the other relatives present offered the host a beer. Incredulously, the host turned it down, saying that he was recovering from a cough. I’ve heard enough and i exploded, “MY DAD JUST HAD A MAJOR OPERATION AND YOU FORCE HIM TO DRINK BAIJIU. YOU ARE RECOVERING FROM A COUGH AND YOU CAN’T DRINK BEER?!?!”

I was so angry I could feel my face flush. I also know I had expired my welcome and it was time to get my parents and leave.

I’m (33F) upset that my husband (31M) got plastic surgery without telling me

I just found out today that my husband got some cool sculpting done a few months ago and never told me about it.

I found out because we were having a casual conversation about something I wanted to have done in the future and he accidentally let it slip that he did this a few months ago and then looked completely uncomfortable.

It was obvious he didn’t mean to say anything and had just gotten caught up in the moment.

I don’t have an issue with any forms of plastic surgery but what I do have a problem with is that he omitted telling me about it.

My husband is a FT student so I have to pay all of our bills. I’m upset that he felt it was okay to spend 4k on a cosmetic procedure but can’t contribute to our household bills every month.

Aside from that, what is really scary, is that he was able to conceal all the appointments from me and time away to get this done. I honestly had no idea.

I need an objective opinion on this, am I validated to feel upset that my husband lied by omission about this?

I’ll never forget the day I heard my husband say “instalment plans killed me”.

I was completely taken aback as I had no idea what he was talking about.

We had been married for a few years, and I hadn’t noticed any financial issues. It wasn’t until later that I realized he was referring to credit card instalment-free plans.

At first, I was curious about what he meant. He explained that he had been using credit cards to purchase items and had taken advantage of instalment plans.

He saw them as a way to spread out the cost of items and make them more affordable. What he hadn’t realized was that by taking on these plans, he was actually taking on more debt.

Cycle of debt

He said that he had been paying the minimum payments on these plans for years, but he was only making a dent in the total balance. The interest on the balance kept accumulating and he was stuck in a cycle of debt. He said that while he thought the instalment plans were a good idea at first, they had quickly piled up and he was now in over his head.

My husband had been using his credit cards for years, but I had no idea that he was taking on instalment plans. I was shocked that he hadn’t told me about it. I had assumed he was being responsible for the cards, but I had no idea he was taking on this extra debt.

I tried to talk to him about it, but he was in denial. He said he could handle it and that he would figure out a way to pay it off. He was stubborn and refused to accept help.

Unfortunately, he was wrong. Our financial situation quickly became worse. We were already struggling and his debt was putting us further in the red. We were barely able to make ends meet and I was starting to worry about our future.

Things got even worse when I went on a shopping spree (before I knew about the debt issues).

I had been wanting to buy some new clothes and I thought it would be a good way to cheer myself up. I charged several items to my husband’s credit card, not realizing that he had taken on an instalment plan for them.

When he saw the charges, he was furious. He said that I had ruined him and that I had made his debt situation worse. He said that I should have known better and that I had put us in a tough financial situation.

I was devastated. I had no idea that my shopping spree would put us in this much trouble. I felt guilty and ashamed and I knew I had to do something to fix it.

I started researching ways to get out of debt and the only thing we could do is stop spending and save more money.

But it is something that is needed in the long run both of us have to stop spending. I wished he told me sooner.

As a woman, I’ve always been aware of how men grade women on looks.

But I never realized the extent to which men judge women based on appearance until I heard an old saying that stated “men grade women on looks from A to F, while women grade men on earning power from A to F.”

This saying made me consider the dating game from a different angle. Women may be viewed as the weaker gender, but when it comes to evaluating potential partners, we’re definitely the more discerning gender.

I understand why men grade women on looks.

It’s a primal instinct, and men are attracted to physical beauty. But what I don’t understand is why men are so quick to judge a woman based solely on her looks. Sure, physical beauty is nice, but there’s so much more to a woman than her appearance.

On the flip side, I think it’s totally reasonable for women to grade men on earning power. Women are naturally drawn to men who can provide for them financially because it’s a sign of stability and security. We want to make sure that our partners can provide for us and our future family, so it makes sense for us to evaluate a man’s financial status.

For me personally, looks and earning power are both important factors when I’m evaluating potential partners. But I don’t think either should be the sole basis for judgement. A man can be physically attractive and have a great job, but if he doesn’t have any other qualities, like intelligence, values, and a sense of humor, then I’m not likely to be interested.

I believe that the key to a successful relationship is finding someone who’s attractive both inside and out. Someone who’s physically attractive and has a great job is a bonus, but I’d rather find someone who also has a kind heart, a great sense of humor, and a shared set of values.

At the end of the day, I think it’s important to remember that no one is perfect. We all have flaws, and that’s okay. Instead of judging someone based solely on looks or earning power, we should look for the qualities that make a person unique and special. That’s what really matters in the long run.

It’s like he won the lottery and strike 1st prize for 4D When I first found out I was going to be a father to twins, I was overwhelmed.

I had just started dating my now-fiancée a few months prior and I had no idea that this would be the outcome. It was like I had won the lottery and struck first prize for 4D.

I remember the day I realized my fiancée was pregnant. I had just come home from work and she was already in bed. She seemed to be in a good mood, so I asked her what was up. She smiled and told me she was pregnant.

I was in shock as we only did it once

I had no idea how this could have happened. I had been so careful this past month and it seemed like we had been using protection every time we were together.

I think the most surprising part was how quickly the news sunk in. It felt like I had known before she even told me. I just knew. I knew that I was going to be a dad and that this was going to change my life forever.

My fiancée and I decided to take a few days to process the news and figure out what we were going to do. We talked through our options and discussed the possibility of having twins. We both agreed that it would be a huge change, but we also knew that we wanted to be parents and that we would make it work.

After a few months, we decided to get an ultrasound and find out if it was indeed twins that we were expecting. We waited anxiously for the results and after what felt like an eternity, the technician finally revealed that we were expecting two babies.

It was like a dream come true. It was a shock as it is not just one! we were going to have two! We had so much to plan and so much to think about. It was a whirlwind of emotions and it felt like the world was spinning around us.

We decided to start planning right away. We had to think about everything from the nursery to the delivery. We also had to think about what kind of parents we were going to be and how we were going to manage two babies at once.

The months flew by and before we knew it, the babies were here. It was a magical moment and I felt like I was the luckiest man alive. We had two beautiful babies and they were both healthy.

Managing twins can be a challenge, but it’s also a blessing. We get to experience the joy of parenting twice over. We get to see the world through two different sets of eyes and we get to watch them grow together.

My fiancée and I have been together for over a year now and I can honestly say that we couldn’t be happier. We have two healthy babies and a beautiful life together. We are so thankful for the gift that we have been given and we are so grateful for our twins.