Feeling stressed by expectations from family members
My parents expect me to take care and help the younger sibling as I’m the eldest. Sometimes I feel that there’s no end to it. My younger sibling has a lot of expectations on me, expecting me to be caring and able to tolerate her hot temper (sister is the kind who will explode easily due to some frictions and will start to recount unpleasant things from the past, which could be as earlier from secondary or primary school). I feel very tired. Mum wants me to have big heart and be the bigger person. Sometimes I feel like no one actually cares about my feeling and well being, mum always told me bcos I’m the eldest so I should give in to the younger ones.
I feel like moving out of my family. The kind of expectations that my mum expecting me to be is not my real personality. I’m not a generous person that can tolerate sibling who kept kisiao at home. I hope i can move out or find a partner that’s emotionally stable. Sibling kept working from home everyday, hopefully she can go back to office soon. Im so sick of dealing with an emotionally unstable person. I feel so tired. …
Here are what netizens think:
- You’re absolutely right – there won’t be an end to this and no one actually cares about your feelings. If you enable all of this then nothing will change. It’s ok to be intolerant of other people’s bad behaviour. Try showing some of your hot temper for a change.
- Just say no. Be selfish. Maybe you need to just pack a bag and just go off for a week and spend it with some peace and quiet away from them. Just because people expect things from you doesn’t mean you have to deliver at the expense of your own mental health. At the end of the day letting people (family or not) take you for granted is your choice. Make plans to move out now if you can’t deal with it any longer but if you don’t set boundaries in your relationships then it really doesn’t matter where you live.