When I started university, I was excited for all the opportunities and freedom that came with it. I was especially excited to finally have an allowance of my own; my parents gave me $50 a day to do with as I pleased.
It felt so liberating to be able to do whatever I wanted with my own money. I couldn’t wait to start spending it!
Spends without thinking
I felt like I was finally an adult.
I started to buy whatever caught my eye, whether I needed it or not.
I bought new clothes, went out for dinner, and splurged on other goodies as it did not matter whether I had enough money as every day when I wake up, I would see a $50 note waiting for me on the dining table.
On top of the $50 that I get, my transport expenses were also all paid for by a card which my Mum has supp for me.
So basically, the $50 was all for me to spend on whatever I want.
Boyfriend needs to budget his money, can’t afford my lifestyle
Meanwhile, my boyfriend was struggling to make ends meet. He was also a student, but he didn’t have the same allowance that I had.
He had to budget his money carefully and make sure he had enough for his meals and also other expenses.
While I was spending without a care in the world, he had to worry about where his next meal was coming from.
Began to look down on him
I began to look down on him for not having the same freedom that I had. I wanted him to be like me, able to spend without thinking instead of worrying and complaining that this or that is too costly.
He would mostly suggest that we eat hawker or the most fast foods like Macs or KFC which was still within his budget range.
However, I like to eat things like sushi and while I can see that he tries to accommodate me whenever I want to eat it and just starve for the next few meals in order to afford one meal like that, I couldn’t keep up with his lifestyle of just eating hawker food for most of my meals.
Results became worst
To keep up with me, my boyfriend also took up part time work just to have money to go out with me and eat with me whatever I want.
As a result, he did not do well in his exams and had to redo a few modules.
Yet, I chose to blame him for not prioritising his studies and try to chase money instead, not knowing that I was the cause of it and because he wanted to match up to me and please me.
Broke up with me afterwards
My boyfriend and I broke up shortly afterwards.
He told me that he finally had enough with trying to make me happy and match up with me. He told me that we both belong to different worlds.
I was in one where I had everything easy in life while he had to work for what he wanted.
I was at first angry with him for using such a lame excuse to break up with me but as time when by and I stepped into the workforce, I finally understood what he meant and his intentions.
Now that it has been almost 8 years since we graduated, I couldn’t help but think that if I were to be more prudent and understanding, things between us might not have became this way.
He was really the one that got away.