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Monday, September 26, 2022


I’ve been dating my gf for a year. Before we got together, she gave me the impression she was a person who loves to exercise, eat well, and take great care of herself. She doesn’t drink or smoke.


Doesn’t eat junk or processed food too. She moved into my place 4 months ago and I find she doesn’t seem to be what she says she is.

She fills the kitchen with chips and chocolates. She orders Korean alcoholic drinks in cartons and has more than a can every night.

The freezer is full of frozen fried food, sweet drinks, snacks and ice cream. She tells me when it’s that time of the month she will have craving for these kinds of food. I can accept it but that time of the month can’t possibly be every day? She’s snacking and drinking every day while watching k drama. Then she will have a craving to have Korean instant noodles as supper at the same time.

She used to be dressier in the beginning and would deck out in colours that suited her, but now she wears full-on black every day and it really doesn’t sit well in my eyes.


It’s like she’s ready to go to a funeral anytime. I’m a visual person and I also make effort to look good for her. I still go for regular haircuts and I still cycle and lift weights. I brush my teeth before I kiss her but she doesn’t. She doesn’t bother about her appearance anymore and I’ve not seen her exercise for months. I find myself getting increasingly frustrated at home while I’m with her.

I still love her but I find that she’s very different from when we started to date.

Is this what it’s like living together? I haven’t even talked about chores. There are some chores that she refuses to do and she said it’s my place after all, so I’ll have to be the one to do it. I think I’m covering 80% chores while she’s only keen in doing 20%.

She has the habit of leaving washed underwear in the toilet and I would have to be the one to take it out to hang because she would forget and ask me to do it instead. There are many other instances that she would forget to do something and I would be the one finishing the chore. I cannot imagine doing this long-term.

When I try to talk about it she would get upset and binge snack and drink. I’m not even arguing with her. It’s just talking in a calm tone.


Is that time of the month that bad that it becomes close to almost every day? Or she’s not what I think she is? How can I improve the situation?

Here are what netizens think:

  • It’s your place anyway…as she said, then kick her out of your place. I would reconsider whether this is the kind of person to fall in love and be with. Seem the compatibility is very low now. If one has to change from what she said, it should be for better not worse. I’m not you, but I can’t tolerate with this kind of behavior and I don’t think she would be a good mother for my kids at the end.
  • You two are a big mismatch! It’s sad to see she doesn’t love herself much, and not taking care of her fitness. Likely this is true herself, which you can’t change much. Just leave her. Breaking up this toxic relationship is beneficial for both you and her. She’ll find someone who’s as messy as her.
  • LOL after dating for only a year and she’s completely let herself go already. DUMP HER
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