I am in a dilemma, but it is going to be quite a long story so pardon me if my grammar is not good.
I broke up with my ex bf, we were together for 3 years and there was this particular day where I was shot down by my group mates and I was upset and I ranted to my ex, and my ex said “why your friends so cb?” But all I wanted him to do is listen and sayang me, instead he said that which made me feel that he judge my choices of friends. He came over to find me the following day to apologize, but it was at my limit. I decided to just break up with him, and not replying him despite him messaging to apologize.
Then my classmate asked me for a chance to be my bf, I gave him a chance and taking him as my rebound because I feel that he cares for me when my ex wasn’t around with me in school and I felt lonely. But it didn’t lasted long as all the classmate wanted from me is just to be intimate and I hated him for that. And I left him shortly but he keeps messaging me saying we are meant to be but it just irks me as he says he just wanted to experience love and snuggles and not into intimate, but every time when I go to his house, all he wanted was to be intimate, I hate it. It was then I felt my ex was really better, but I was stubborn and told my ex I wanted to explore more options, I wanted to live the life of having many guys chasing after me, and my ex gave in to my demands and says he is willing to wait.
Then I met a guy from some online platform, he is so hot, good looking and have 6 pac and all, have a nice voice, can take good photos (unlike my ex) and really cares about me. My parents love the new guy too because he is from NUS and he is from JC, I mean my ex is also from NUS but I feel this guy is way hotter than my ex. My ex warned me about him but I didn’t listen. He was so sweet to me and asked me to be his gf. I accepted within a day because my ex made me angry and I felt this hot guy was the one. Even when I lashed out at this hot guy, he still says he wants to be with me but within 3 days of being together, he started to change his attitude towards me. I was upset that he could only message me in the morning and at night, the whole afternoon he doesn’t use his phone at all which pisses me off. And he say stuffs like “If i spend 10 mins talking to you, I would have wasted 10 mins to do my stuffs”. Or if we were to plan on a date, he will say stuffs like “Recess week is the only time I am comfortable with meeting you, other times I have to sacrifice.” Why must he use words like sacrifice? Like what the hell you asked me to be your gf and the least you can do is make time for me? I started to get angry and this hot guy starts to say mean words like “You are not my type, but because you came to me yourself and let me take advantage, so I was thinking why not?” and I told him “Fine, since you having your mid terms, let’s not talk for a week.” Then he agreed. Actually one thing good about my ex is even though he is busy in NUS, he still replies me very fast and gives me the attention I need. And even he have mid terms too, he still multi task and replies me or make time to eat with me.
So the Sunday before his mid terms, I just dropped him a message wishing him Good Luck and to me horror, he started to say more mean stuffs like I broke the promise of not wanting to text him and he got angry and lashed out on me. And he started spam calling me and say if I don’t pick up, he will not talk to me ever again. Why do I feel that he is toxic? Then at 3am, he drop a message saying he is sorry for being a jerk and all, and says he wants to meet me the following day or 1st Oct to talk about it. I didn’t want to because he have mid terms but yet he appeared at my house and talked. I really wanted to be heart soft and accept him but I was still angry and he walk off. Then I ask him if he dated me just so that he could take advantage of me? He said “Think whatever you want, after all I am a shitty person 
” It really pisses me off further, I wanted to give him a chance and he keeps doing shit like this.
Now I don’t know what to do, I really love the hot guy and I am sad that things turned out this way for us but he is being so mean to me, and for my ex who have always been here for me, I feel that he is starting to lose his love for me. Should I go back to my ex or should I message the hot guy and talk things out?
I just hope the hot guy will change for the better and restart our relationship. For my ex, I told him let me try dating this hot guy first and if it doesn’t work out, I will go back to you, and he sort of agreed. But I can feel that my ex don’t love me as much as before