A netizen asked if he should start asking his girlfriend to pay rent for living in his house.
Here is the story:
Hi – I want to start by saying I haven’t asked my partner this question yet, I just want to be sure that I am not being a jerk when I do.
I will preface this with some context:
I bought my first property in 2020, I am the sole owner and pay the mortgage and all the other bills myself.
My partner and I have lived together for a year and a half. When we first moved in I paid for everything because she was too unwell to work and I wanted to support her enough that me paying for her expenses seemed fair enough given her situation, plus I could just about afford it.
Since then my partner has started working part-time so we agreed it was fair for her to start paying for her half of the utilities.
The washer-dryer within the flat broke the other day and she said “well it’s not for me to help pay to fix it, it’s your flat”, which didn’t sit right with me as she uses it too so it didn’t seem fair.
This essentially renders me her ‘rentless landlord,’ as I have landlord-type responsibilities, (pay for anything broken, upgrades to the property etc. which she’s voiced she shouldn’t pay for), and cater for her in the flat whilst she pays for none of it.
Would it be fair to ask for rent? Only something like about $300 to $400 for me to squirrel into a shared pot, which I’d contribute to also, to do things like improve the flat or repair the things that are broken/ugly.
I want to make clear I do NOT want to profit off of my partner. I just think it’s unfair that she’s paying living in the same home as me, enjoys the same benefits of a tenant and I accept all of the risk for anything that breaks/changes whilst she lives here.
Netizen’s comments
The fact that you housed her for over a year yet she feels no obligation to help with a broken appliance shows her level of entitlement.
She isn’t willing to do a fraction of what you did for her. If I were you I would be rethinking this entire arrangement. Asking for rent is perfectly reasonable, she isn’t your dependent or your responsibility.
And if she is unwilling to do that then ask yourself if that’s the type of woman you want as a long term partner.