I was in shock when my girlfriend of almost ten years suddenly broke up with me. We were great together and had a really special bond. I thought we were going to be together forever.
I was devastated, and it caused me to act out in some really immature ways. I started bad mouthing her to all my friends, and anyone else who would listen.
I wanted them to view me as the “good guy” and her as the “bad guy”. I would talk about how she was selfish and how she didn’t appreciate me. I would even talk about her looks and her personality in a way that was really mean.
Even good things that happened to her, I would claim that it was because of my sacrifice that she gets all the good things and I even lied that I supported her financially.
I thought I was doing the right thing by talking bad about her, but the truth is I was only making the situation worse.
I was showing her that I was not mature enough to handle the break up. I was also ruining her reputation, and that really wasn’t fair. She didn’t deserve to be talked about like that.
I eventually realized how wrong I was for bad mouthing my ex and I stopped. I knew that it wasn’t going to fix our relationship, and it was only going to make things more difficult. I also knew that it was wrong to speak so negatively about someone who I once cared about.
Instead of trying to make myself look like the good guy, I should have just accepted the break up and moved on. I should have focused on healing and taking care of myself.
I should have taken the time to understand why the break up happened and accepted that it was for the best.
Bad mouthing my ex was a mistake, and I learned a valuable lesson. I now understand that it’s never ok to spread rumors or talk negatively about someone. It’s a sign of immaturity, and it doesn’t get anyone anywhere.
If you’ve ever been in a similar situation, I would encourage you to think twice before bad mouthing your ex. It’s not going to make you look like the good guy, and it’s only going to make the situation worse.
Instead, focus on healing and taking care of yourself. You will be much better off in the long run.