My husband cheated on me around 5 months ago with his colleague for af ew weeks, that was flirting and some kissing, wants to be able to go out without telling me where he’s going to be, who he’ll be with, or what time he’ll be home, and expects me to be okay with this.
we have been together for 7 years, we have two kids. He is an excellent father to our kids, though he does lose points for reckless decisions that affect our family
I have run out of ways to explain why this makes me uncomfortable. He thinks I’m being controlled by wanting to know. I think its on him to build back trust if he wants to be with me and that him volunteering that information would at least help a little.
I KNOW I’m not to blame for him cheating, I am only to blame for my own actions that damaged our relationship and if he wanted to handle it in a healthy way he could have and chose not to.
the changes we have made to our relationship in the past 5 months have drastically changed our day to day life. There isn’t much left that I could “control” even if I wanted to. We are just struggling on that happy balance between what makes him happy and what gives me peace of mind.
I like advice that isn’t “divorce him”, because for more reasons than I care to type, I can’t.
Here are what netizen thinks:
If divorce is absolutely not possible right now, stop giving making his life worse than what he’s doing and work towards an exit plan. Sorry but the cheating combined with no plans of stopping and thinking he gets to decide how long you are bothered by this all screams he won’t change and he doesn’t give a damn what you think of it. He thinks he’s got you trapped. Prove him wrong.
Go get an std test, please.If you don’t have any active symptoms. We had an 18-year-old girl come into our clinic who’ll have infertility issues for life because off her cheating boyfriend gave her something and it went undetected (asymptotic) for three years