I think I raped my boyfriend and don’t know how to talk to him
We’ve been dating for about a month now and only were making out and cuddling without S.
I wanted to move further, but he has a rule that he will not sleep with anybody that he knows for less than a 3 months. It’s ok with me since we both are looking for a long term relationship and I enjoy his company as is.
Last night I had a couple of drinks with my friend to celebrate her first birthday. We’re both stupid, so it didn’t go well. There was some silly argument and I called my BF and asked if he could pick me up so I could stay in his place.
Two hours later I am with my BF cuddling in bed as we already did several times. I don’t know why, but I got on top of him and decided to have S. I asked him if everything is okay, but he didn’t say anything and didn’t kiss me when I reached for it.
He actually said that everything is okay after a minute, but his tone was cold and unusual. I didn’t have much time to stay and discuss what happened in the morning. He was avoiding my touch, but said that everything is alright.
I don’t know how to bring up what happened, he keeps telling that everything is fine, but I don’t think it’s.
He might think I’m a loose woman after drinking a few, and now his response make me feel like I violated him.
What should I do?