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Wednesday, December 6, 2023


My daughter is getting married soon. When I meet up with my future in-laws, they say they don’t intend to give dowry. The table was like silent quiet a long time. Nvm lah, what to do? As long my daughter is happy…


Here are what netizens think:

  • Oh my daughter has just got married. We never ask for dowry but was given $8888 red packet by our in law
  • My dad told my in laws he not selling his daughter. So just a token sum for good luck/tradition is enough. He left it up to them the amount.
  • I see many people saying it’s not to sell the daughter. it’s for tradition and sincerity. I guess tradition and sincerity is measured in monetary/material terms.
  • It’s not about “selling” daughter or wat. It’s about sincerity The in law at least buy something for the girl? Let the bride at least choose to get 1 item? Even not expensive gold, at least others? But true, they must be happy with each other and live happily.
  • Basic is must have. You are not selling your daughter, but at least she must be worth something in their eyes. If not… She goes over. No different from a maid. So the basic of gold, 5点金。 And maybe 10k . If the family is so so. If the family cannot even afford. Then your daughter has no stand in the family.
  • even though you shouldn’t be treating your daughter as commodity but I have a feeling this is sort of a red flag from your in laws when they don’t even want to give $88..?
  • I would not agree for no dowry. As it would should how the in law is looking at my daughter. Not commodities but definitely not freebies.
  • Year 2023 , living expenses expensive. If you ask for dowry, but your daughter have to borrow money from bank just to give you. Are you ok? Give happiness to your daughter instead of giving debt. If I were your daughter, I will feel very hurt. It shows that I worth nothing to my future parent in laws.How does your future son in law react to this when he knew his parent are not gg to pay any dowry?? My mil is not rich an she is a widow. My parents never asked anything much from her. Yet my mil is able to give me 两点金。she even brought me to her fab goldsmith shop to chose the design l like. It costs her $2.2k back then. My hubby top the remaining 两点金for my mil. I felt so appreciated to be their part of their family.
  • For me, I feel it should be initiated as a token from the groom as a respect for bringing up the daughter (wife). It can be any amount that the groom feel is fair. I’m sure the wife’s family will accept any amount as long as the groom treats her and her family good (most important). It should not be dictated by the wife’s family. If not it will be seen as selling off their daughter which some family do. Have seen a fair share of such squabbles with unreasonable terms from other families sadly.
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