(F21) I have an imaginary boyfriend because I get sad and lonely.
I don’t know if this is a place to post, but for the last 2 years of my life, i’ve had an imaginary boyfriend.
It started off as a little crazy joke to make a former friend-with-benefits jealous, and I used it to tell my parents I had a boyfriend so they would stop asking me why I was single.
But, i’ve held this imaginary dude in my head since then and have built “memories” “actual feelings” with him when i get lonely.
I do see other guys, to try and leave this little imagination, because I am not THAT delusional with this little weird imaginary stuff.
I actually try to meet new guys, to forget and stop having to pretend, but it never works for me. I never have had a real boyfriend and every guy i have ever been with used me for just for my body.
When guys ask me if I’ve ever been in a relationship, I use my imaginary boyfriend and refer to him as my ex, and use actual combined experiences of mine with other men to describe this imaginary bf/ex.
When I get super sad and lonely, i imagine this guy and I and how he is perfect and just imaginary situations i make up. I cry myself to sleep wishing he was real.
I “write” to him about how my day is and how i feel, how i wish he was real because my life is very lonely and i have never had a man treat me right. so he’s my version of an ideal male.
i feel like a weirdo that i have to do this. i’m a very attractive young woman, used to model, and if i ever told a body i did this , they would probably be baffled.
Netizens’ comments
It sucks you’re experiencing such bad loneliness. Not all men are the same. A man that respects you, would not just use you for your body. But to know if a man respects you, you have to respect yourself first.
No man is perfect. We’re all deeply flawed and all have our own individual quirks. But one good thing about your imaginary boyfriend is that it’s giving you a place to start your journey to find that partner. Your imaginary boyfriend is the list of attributes and values you want your future husband to possess. Write these things down and keep meeting different men. Don’t worry about what the men look like. Try to get to just know different men, and then when you start meeting men that are fulfilling the list you have of your future husband, start spending more time with them and explore developing a deeper relationship than just your friendships.
I’ve been with A LOT of very bad women in the past due to loneliness, but I kept my imaginary gf in my heart until I found her. It took me 14 years but I found her.
You can find yours too. You just have to make a lot of friends and meet a lot of new people. Just be patient and keep searching. If you get burned out for a bit, take some time to recharge, then when you feel ready go back on your search.