My wife of 13 years divorced me after she cheated and blames me
A little bit of back story is that I met my ex wife when i was 15 and she was 15 And we had that classic friends become lovers kind of relationship.
And after 3 years of us first meeting we started dating 1 year later we got married. Her family loved me and my family hated her, and I had an amazing connection with my family but I loved my ex to much to break up with them.
After a lot of drama, i cut contact with my family and they blocked me on all their social media accounts. I dont even know how old my younger siblings are anymore.
Me and my ex stayed in an apartment for a while working low income jobs barely making rent. But we loved each other and we were very intimate and encouraged each other we would make it out of this hole.
Eventually we did and she found a higher paying white collar job from a friend that I hadnt met before. We started moving up and eventually bought our own home.
We never wanted children because we felt we never truly got to enjoy a good life with just us until she got that job. A year later and we were still very close and our relationship was still very strong.
One day I was shopping for some dinner when i come across one of her friends I recognized from facebook, i had never met this friend in person so I said hi nice to meet you and introduced my name.
She didnt recognize me for obvious reasons. I told her my wife is friends with her. She then asked “which friend” and to that I responded with “Allison” (not her real name)
the moment I said that this woman stared at me blankly, like if she just saw a serial killer or something. She stuttered a bit then said “shes your wife?” I said “yeah what about it?”
She stared a bit then said out of nowhere “do you know her boss?” I didnt and i replied with that again her face got more and more pale.
She looked like she was about to cry I asked her whats wrong and she said “your wife has been sleeping with her boss”
I immediately started asking whats her proof and she said that she commonly sees her go into her bosses office regularly and since this friend is next door she can hear everything.
Im horrified, i almost drop the groceries im holding. I then leave still confused, questioning everything.
When i got home my wife wasnt yet but i just sat on one of the kitchen bar stools with my phone out like i had just been talking to someone.
My wife comes into the house shouts “im home” and then walks into the kitchen with me sitting there. She was talking about her day but then saw my blank expression.
She looked at me asked whats wrong and when i didnt respond she knew what i had just learned.
My wife began crying and screaming at me saying that she had to and thats how she was able to pay for our home for our life. And i just stare. I didnt know what to do
everything i built and destroyed for her piled up to nothing. She says that if dont respond that she will file for a divorce. I finally build up enough energy to ask “why, i never asked you to do that for me, for us.
I was happy in the place we were when i had you.” She cried some more then told me she is sorry but she knew we needed a better life and while yeah we werent in the best place went to far to make it better.
She then said if i hadnt missed out on life changing jobs we could have avoided this.
I told her i left my dream job to be with her more. All i wanted everyday was to see her to hug and kiss her. It was long before I slept on a sofa for a week and that sofa eventually turned into a separate apartment.
We did get divorced and while her parents reached out to me saying they were sorry, i had ignored it. I pushed everyone out of my life, people i loved, people i needed and now for the very first time im alone no one with me.
I dont think i can or want to make it another year and honestly i just needed a place for someone to know what happened.
I know it was out of my control but i passed up on previously good opportunities to make a living because it would separate us. Now i realized i made a mistake. I dont know who is at fault and i dont think i want