My husband’s hygiene is so bad it’s hard to be near him
My (26F) husband (27M) has horrible hygiene. He has acne and horrible breath as a result. His breath smells like actual cat poop, and it is so bad that when he speaks to me within 5 feet I can smell it.
I have tried to help him with skincare, I’ve tried to help him develop routines, I’ve been incredibly understanding.
However, it is a fight to get him to even shower and brush his teeth. I don’t know how he does this, because if I smelled like that I wouldn’t be able to handle it.
I will remind him, and he will say he’s going to do it, and then won’t.
Today, I tried reminding him again and he screamed, wrapped a robe around his head, and collapsed on the bed screaming.
This can’t be normal. I don’t know how to get him to brush his teeth. This is constant, and it never stops. A lot of the time, he’s normal.
But he throws a temper tantrum if I ask him to brush his teeth. I am literally sick of it. He will (for lack of a better word) screech if I try to hold him accountable for things in general.
He has complete crying meltdowns. I have tried so hard to be nice and understanding but it’s been incredibly hard for me.
At this point, I think his hygiene is inconsiderate to the people who have to be around him at work. I have never met a man like this, and I think I’m going to leave him.
Netizens’ comments
- My husband had horrendous body odor. He literally had to keep his shoes and socks outside the stench was so unbearable (like make your eyes water bad). He did shower on a regular basis.
It was a symptom of renal cancer. Once he started chemo, no more eye watering stink.
I did have a roommate that had a enormous fear of water. Almost drowned as a kid. Wouldn’t even drink water…No bathing, no showering, no swimming, no going out when raining. They would use a damp sponge to wash. They are/were a marathon runner and glass blower. Both activities generate a lot of sweat. More than a sponge bath was needed.
- Has he always been this way? I know I’ve been through phases where my mental health was so bad that any sort of hygiene was insanely hard for me. Brushing my teeth, showering, the works. But my boyfriend helped me with it.
Even if he physically had to bring me into the bathroom and bathe me or get my toothbrush ready and sit there with me while I cried and did it, but not once did I have a tantrum about it because I just didn’t want to. All of that said, I don’t think it’s a mental health thing considering his actions, but it could be.
I would keep that as a possibility, but if this doesn’t change, you are not his mother. You shouldn’t have to force a grown man to shower and brush his teeth. It’s honestly probably just laziness at this point and when you call him out it makes him realize how lazy he is, which is probably embarrassing, which causes him to lash out instead of fixing it. Good luck