Boyfriend said I don’t truly love him if I’m not letting him live his life, including flirting with other girls and dating others.
We have been together on and off for 5 years. Met in 2018, and 3 months later I found out he was talking to someone else. Then he went to another country and we were long distance. I have always worried he would leave me, I am not good enough because of my mental health.
I found out he was going on dates with another girl in said country from gut feeling. Ended up with him confessing that he wants to break up. We broke up in June 2019, but after stalking I realised they have been dating since March 2019.
I was hurt and became obsessive of their relationship. We didn’t speak for a whole year, reconnected early 2021 after they broke up.
Started dating and it was okay, until I broke down knowing he was going on an exchange to another country this year. Told him my fears about him finding someone else and replacing me.
He said I am too insecure, and he doubted if I really love him. He said love should be unconditional, and I should be happy if he is happy. He said he wants freedom, and he wants me in his life forever. But why can’t I be happy if he is happy dating other girls? Why would I limit his life?
He said to me as if it is a favour that he didn’t even see anyone else this past 2 years. He even told me out of frustration that he would rather just live his life, date and sleep with other girls, and if I truly loved him then I would stay. I can’t let go of this and I am feeling extremely depressed. All my friends are polyamorous so I suspect they would think that this is ok and I am an asshole for limiting my boyfriend’s life experience.