Divorce hurts everyone, not just you
Just a PSA to everyone to treat relationships leading to marriage seriously. Open your eyes wide before getting into a marriage. Nobody wants a failed relationship, and no doubt, and we all know a divorce hurts. For some only momentarily, before experiencing a sense of relief. But what many don’t realise, is the impact it may have on people around you, and the consequences it may have on your future relationships.
Divorce is traumatic not just for you, but the people close to you who had to support you through those difficult times. Even worse if the circumstances leading to the divorce was toxic in ways that affected your family and friends. Your loved ones are going to remember that trauma, and that trauma WILL resurface when you are finally in a good place and in a healthy relationship, when you’re about to marry a good person. Not because they can’t see that the person is different and that the circumstances are different, but because of trauma, it’s going to take time for trust to be rebuilt, for faith that history won’t repeat itself again.
And you will get secondary hurt, again, from the reactions of your loved ones around you as you prepare to get married a second time. It will make you doubt if you should even get married again if it’s going to trigger everyone so badly. Even if they admit your new partner is different. Their words and actions, advice on precautions, and reactions WILL hurt you, again. Both out of love for you, but also out of fear of having to go through the same thing all over again.
So think through it carefully, and make sure the person you’re marrying is the right person to marry. Don’t take it lightly. It’s a solemn life-changing affair. It’s not so easy and consequence free to get out of a marriage as the culture today would like us to believe.
I’m still a proponent of marriage. But just really be sure and committed before you do it.