Im 19 and my mom is known for doing insensitive jokes. When my boyfriend is around, she’s always sarcastic and doing jokes that makes me and my boyfriend uncomfortable.
She jokes about me being lazy and not being a good daughter, and makes jokes about my boyfriend’s size (he’s like really tall like 180cm, and im small, like 152cm something, but we’re both really uncomfortable when someone points out our height.)
So, we always suck it up and laugh akwardly, trying to indicate that it made us uncomfortable, but that wasn’t enough, it made us so uncomfortable that my boyfriend doesn’t want to come over, and honestly don’t want him here with my mom, so just go to his house even tho it’s a bit far, only to avoid my mom’s behaviour.
I didn’t want to throw my bf under the bus, so told her that her jokes made me uncomfortable. She didnt take me very seriously, saying that she is always like that and im being too sensitive.
So now she thinks that i’m spending too much time in my bfs place, and she stated that she didnt like that. (I think she said that bc she doesn’t have any control in what im doing, if were in my house, were always around my sister and always doing things around everyones schedule, ex.
If we dont wake up early and take breakfast with my mom then she gets mad. So really we dont have any freedom to not eat if we aren’t hungry, or to wake up a little late.)
This week, i went on monday to my bfs place (i didnt adressed this earlier but he lives with his mother and sister.) And stayed till wednesday. We slept late that wednesday, as we were really really tired. At 1 pm my mom was calling me and leaving a lot of messages, i answered and she told me that ‘i should remember have a mother that worries about me and i should talk to her to make her know im okay’ i find this really exagerating, knowing the fact that im in my bfs house and nothing bad its going to happen to me there, as we were just sleeping, so texted her that but she ignored me for the rest of the day.
Today, tuesday, i said that might go over to my bfs place again in friday, and she told me that ‘i shouldnt go over too much or people are going to think im a slut’ i knew this was a “joke” so told her that only she is thinking that.
And she said ‘its because you are’ and i was livid. I started to scream at her saying how can she say that to her child and that she always makes ‘jokes’ that everyone knows are not too much of a joke, making everyone around her unconfortable, but she doesnt care bc shes trying to ‘be funny’ she told me to stop yelling at her and i just left the room. Later she left the house, leaving idk where.
Now i realize i may be a little harsh in yelling at her, as was frustraded bc did tell her in so many ocassions that trying to be funny shouldnt make people uncomfortable.