My mother confiscated all $3,800 of my 3-year-old son’s Chinese New Year angbao money “for safety”, then spent it on a automatic tile-washing Mahjong table.
Chinese New Year just ended, and I am currently having a massive fallout with my mother.
My son is 3 years old. This year, during CNY visits, our generous relatives, grandparents, and my husband’s wealthy uncles gave my son quite a substantial amount of red packets.
Total collected was around $3,800.
My intention was to deposit every single cent into my son’s Child Development Account (CDA) / POSB Kids Savings Account so it can earn interest and be used for his future preschool fees.
When we were visiting my parents’ house on Day 3, my mom (62F) saw my son’s heavy angbao pouch. She took it from my diaper bag and said: “Aiya, young people don’t know how to handle cash safely, later you drop on the MRT how? I keep for my grandson first! I will put into my safe deposit box for him!”
In traditional Singaporean Asian families, fighting over angbaos on CNY day is seen as bad luck, so I reluctantly said: “Okay Ma, keep for two days, after weekend pass to me, I want to bank into his CDA account.”
Yesterday, I went over to my parents’ house to fetch my son and collect the angbao cash.
When I walked into the living room, I saw a brand new, high-tech, automatic electric Mahjong table (those kind that automatically shuffles and stacks tiles with built-in heater) sitting right in the center of the living room!
My mom and her three auntie friends were happily playing mahjong around it.
I asked my dad privately in the kitchen: “Pa, where did Ma get the money to buy a $3,500 automatic mahjong table?”
My dad sighed, looked down, and whispered: “Your mom took your son’s CNY angbao cash and paid the delivery uncle yesterday…”
I felt the blood rush straight to my head.
I marched out to the living room, stopped the mahjong game, and confronted my mom: “Ma! Did you use my son’s $3,800 angbao money to buy a mahjong table?!”
My mom didn’t even blink. She casually threw a tile and said: “Aiya, so noisy for what? That money is given by MY relatives and MY friends what! Without me, your son will get those angbaos meh? So technically it is MY money! Besides, this mahjong table put in my house, next time my grandson grow up can also play what! I am investing in family happiness!”
HER THREE AUNTIE FRIENDS EVEN CHIRPED IN: “Aiya girl ah, don’t be so unfilial to your mother over small money lah! Old people play mahjong prevent dementia you know!”
Small money?! That is $3,800 meant for my son’s education fund! She literally stole money meant for her own 3-year-old grandson to buy a luxury gambling toy!
My husband wants to report this as theft, but my dad is begging us not to call the police to save face. How do I force a selfish parent to return money they embezzled from their own grandchild?