My friends treat me as a second option to hang out when their boyfriends aren’t free. Should I find new friends?
I’ve noticed this a lot but a lot Singaporean girls, in their free time if they have a boyfriend – they just go out with them every single day.
I’m not sure if it’s a Singapore girl thing but other friends I’ve had from other countries don’t do this and actually balance relationships and friendships equally.
And when they break up with their boyfriends – they ask me to hang out with them. This literally happened to 2 friends I considered close to me.
Immediately after breaking up with their boyfriend – they suddenly had “more time” for me. Or when their boyfriend cancelled on them, they’d ask me at the last minute to go out with them.
It makes me feel as if the friendship is one sided and they only come to me when they’re lonely / need something.
Personally for me – I would balance time with my boyfriend and still make time for my friends. Because if you break up, your friends would still be there for you but not your boyfriend.
I just feel so upset because they treat me as a “last resort”. Am I not worthy of their time as well?
Netizens’ comments
- Wait till you find out what happens when they have kids!
- If they’re serious about their relationships, it’s not uncommon to prioritize spending time with your significant other
It’s very common among men too. You’ll be hanging with your bros, getting drinks and catching up regularly. One by one they all get attached, and suddenly your group boys night will become you and that one dude who was a friend’s friend awkwardly meeting up for a Friday night non-date dinner
I’m not sure if finding new friends will help here, unless your new friends are the cannot find bf kind - You chio or not, I can be your friend.