My wife cheated on me 9 months into us dating. I just found out 16 years & 4 children later. I feel like a dagger has gone into my heart but somehow, I feel numb.
For those that want the details: her then manager kissed her on break and then went back to his place and did the dead all in one day.
She continued to work with him for several years and he even attended our wedding. Have not seen him in 12 years. She says she instantly regretted it and has stressed over it ever since. FYI my oldest is 10.
It is so long ago but I feel so betrayed as I have always had a zero tolerance to cheating, but I won’t throw away an otherwise amazing marriage and happy family for this…
Are there success stories? How do I move forward with the marriage and process my feelings?
- he was at the wedding! that is cold. did they exchange knowing glances, a chuckle at your expense? i am sure he got a laugh in at the both of you. i couldn’t live with that.
- There is no expiration date on betrayal. For her, it was 16 years ago, not for you.
- She invited this guy to your wedding. Knowing she cheated on you with him. That is so messed up.
- I can understand wanting to work it out for the kids and maybe in this case, if she has told you EVERYTHING at this point, maybe it can work. You need to get EVERYTHING out in the open now though before committing another 16 years to this woman. Make her write the entire story down on paper, all the ugly details. Tell her if you find a single detail was missing or was a lie later on, it’ll mean immediate divorce.
- My next door neighbor went thru the same thing. Found out she cheated on him with a coworker while they were engaged 17 years later he found a letter she had written to him but didn’t send. Their affair lasted 3 weeks according to the letter
He confronted her and she confirmed it telling him it was over 17 years ago and should not matter.