I usually go dutch for all things with my then bf (now husband). Even after we are married, we go dutch for most things. I am fine with this as I used to earn more than him. When it comes to meals, i will sometimes pay more too cause i like to eat expensive meals.. but my husband is fine with cheaper meals.
When my friends learnt about this, they thought it’s ridiculous and i should ask my husband to pay for everything, because their partners pay for everything. They even tell me that they have their partner’s credit cards and they can use it anytime. My husband doesn’t really use credit cards much, and I don’t mind too.
These things were not really an issue to me previously, but my friends sometimes rub it in my face that their partners/husbands are bringing them on holidays and paying for everything (even when they earn similar incomes, and the wives are perfectly capable of paying for themselves). They even told me “I don’t even bring my wallet when i go out with XXXX. If i need to bring my wallet if i am with a guy then I won’t be with them.”
They also told me that I should ask my husband to pay for everything, now that he has a job that is paying much more than me. But I feel like it is unfair, it should be him offering if he wants to. And even if he doesn’t, I won’t be offended – it’s his money not mine. Before we got married we also agreed that we will go dutch for most things.
I am not sure if my friends are purposely rubbing it in my face, but overtime, it is making me feel bitter that i am paying for everything myself. How can i stop feeling this way?
Editor Notes: Get rid of your friends, gender equality? Here you go equality in everything.