My boyfriend and I were together for 2 years before we broke up. The reason for the break up was mainly because he wanted to set up a business on his own and don’t have time even for himself.
Another reason is that I’m really immature and easily stressed out. He had always been there for me but I didn’t because I used to think that my “stress” was a lot for me.
Some context when we were still together:
We were a very loving couple and are always together because we just prioritize each other. He loved me a lot as well by pampering me and treating me like a princess. Due to this, I get angry and mad easily. This year, during Valentine’s day, we agreed to meet after his lesson for a while. On the day itself, he told me that Oh he couldn’t make it because he suddenly remembered that he has to attend some business group project and that we had to cancel the meeting.
I got really furious and I was so mad so he came to me eventually. I know… I know I’m being very unreasonable and now that I recall this incident, I just had that I couldn’t think for him. So there were many instances like that.
We started arguing a lot when internship started for the both of us and eventually we call it quits.
During this month that we’ve broken up, I have been reflecting on my wrongdoings.
A few days back we texted and he said I could text him like usual and he would reply whenever possible (as he is busy with his work). We chatted like usual and he opened up to me saying that he couldn’t function normally after the breakup and that when we were still together, I was the only able to calm him down and helped his insomnia. He told me he hasn’t been sleeping for days and is also having a high fever while he has to deal with his work.
I became very worried and suggested to be there for him (like chit chats and stuffs as he doesn’t want me to come over).
So I talked to him about my things so at least there is someone there for him and eventually he would open up about his stresses. I lied to him saying that I’ve moved on because it hurts to see him suffering (due to the break up) and honestly I want him to move on as well. I tried to keep the conversation casual and try to sound cheerful but most of his replies are just. “Okay” “Mmm” and I understand that he is going through a lot but it just got a little disappointing and draining for me as I don’t know if I’m bothering him or if I came off as ‘needy’. I started asking him about it and I said it’s fine that I can stop talking but he always replied with “I’ll reply when I see” so I just continued sharing about my day. I don’t expect him to reply immediately like he can take a day or so to reply but his reply are so dry and eventually I was so done and I told him I’m going overseas to study because I don’t want to stay at the same place as you. We argued, and that’s the end of it.
I’m still worried about him and I miss him but I really couldn’t take his half-hearted replies without feeling that I’m shamelessly texting him.
Any advice please?