Was I wrong to dump my bf because he can’t cook? Or should I say ex boyfriend lol. So this happened last week and my best friend thinks I was wrong but my mother agrees with me.
We’d been dating for around 8 months and whilst it was rather amusing at first that he couldn’t cook, in the end it became infuriating. I’m talking not even being able to cook pasta or noodles, boiled eggs, even toast. Literally, couldn’t cook at all. Obviously I did all the cooking and I wouldn’t mind if chores were split but he did no housework at all. So when he stayed over at my house, I’d be constantly picking up after and clearing up after him. When I challenged him on this, he’d say “well just tell me what to do and I’ll do it.” I’d have to get home from work and cook him something, because he literally couldn’t even feed himself. Even heating up leftovers.
Like, why do I need to tell you dude? Picking your pants up off the floor, wet towels and pubes out the bathroom is literally just stuff every one does right?
So anyway, I’m a single mum (widowed) and my kids went to their grandparents for the weekend last week. It was my birthday and he asked me what I wanted so I said literally just a cup of tea and breakfast in bed. I don’t care about presents or stuff but just doing that would be heaven. I ordered one of those recipe boxes where you buy the ingredients already weighed out and measured, recipe card is a step by step guide with pictures and even my 8 year old daughter can follow them. He said he’d try, so even though I had my doubts I spent the week looking forward to a lie in and when Saturday night comes around I even laid the stuff out for him for the next morning, including the dry ingredients, utensils and recipe card. The cold ingredients I put at the front of the fridge so he could find them easily.
Sunday morning comes around and he gets up out of bed telling me he was going to make breakfast so I’m thinking to myself, great! A lie in, breakfast in bed and a cup of tea. What more could anyone want right ? Wrong. An hour goes by and still no sign. Another half an hour and I shout down asking if everything’s OK? Yes he shouts. Another hour goes by so I get up and go see what’s going on.
I’m not lying when I say my kitchen was an absolute STATE. Literally every pot and pan used, smears of crap all over the place, burnt food. He still hasn’t even finished cooking it, saying he can’t turn the oven on. Like, it’s literally just a dial and an on switch?
I asked him why he hasn’t asked me for help and he said he’d had to have a lie down because he was tired and he was gonna come get me to find the bacon. (At the front of the fridge where I’d put it the night before)
I showed him and then I snapped, telling him I’d had enough of him and to get out of my house. He looked shocked and yeah I was probably harsh but I work 60hours a week, I put my kids first for everything and never get any time for myself and he couldn’t even make me a cup of tea in bed.
He left, saying I was shaming him for not being able to cook. Maybe I am? But I did everything for him and he couldn’t even look up on YouTube how to poach an egg. My mum says I’m well shot of him and that it would have ended up getting worse and looking after a third child but my best friend says I should give him another chance.