I lent my bf $4000 and now that im struggling w money he won’t pay me back.
I’m not sure if I’m being selfish and I’ve been contemplating on posting this for a few days. Basically about a year or two ago I lent my bf $4000 over the period of a few months we were living together at the time and splitting bills so I had extra money on the side to help him out, we never discussed him paying me back at the time but he did mention he would eventually.
Now I’m moved out on my own paying almost $1000 a month for rent and barely making enough at my new job.
I contacted my bf via text messages explaining how stressed and overwhelmed I am with my bills and I asked if he’d be able to lend me $1000 or $2300 that I would pay back to him within a month or so and he immediately refused.
I felt really bad because it’s already embarrassing to me to have to ask my partner for money because I simply can’t make it for myself right now and I thought maybe he didn’t understand the situation I was in so I guess I sort of started to beg him for it and I brought up that I lent him some money a year or so back and that he could just call it even on that money.
To which he replied calling me selfish and telling me I must have only lent him the money in the first place so I could “use it against him in the future”
he then told me I’m never going to get that money back from him so I might as well drop it and accused me of trying to “use him” for his money.
Now some of you may say maybe he’s broke and me asking him for money made him feel embarrassed or something but my bf is a business owner who runs a very successful business, he has a brand new 2022 car and he has at least $30,000 that I know he has.
Im really not sure if he is right and I am being completely selfish and messed up for feeling bad and thinking he should pay me back or if I’m right for feeling some type of way.