I (40F) am very much jealous of my husband’s (50M) ex. Our relationship started with an affair.
I know it was wrong. Their marriage was on the rocks and my husband wanted to end it. When she (48F) learned about the affair she didn’t scream or shout at me. She was rather calm. She only asked me if I truly loved her husband, I said yes.
She told me that if I am going to be a part of my husband’s life I better treat her kids (19F, 16M and 14F) with respect and not push them to accept her. She didn’t even create any hassle in the divorce. Things were tough. My husband’s parents and friends really criticized us and his parents almost disowned him. If it wasn’t for his ex they would have went with it. But his ex convinced them to not cut them off. Their parents did forgive my husband but I still feel like an outsider to them.
But they do love our kid (4M).
My husband’s ex is very different. She never held a grudge against me. Always pushed her kids to have a relationship with their dad. His oldest doesn’t talk to him because of the divorce and it always hurts my husband that his daughter wants nothing to do with them.
The rest of them are good. They do not love me but they are very civil. She never bad mouthed me or called me a homewrecker. She did her best for the kids. She still tries her best so that her oldest daughter has a good relationship with her dad. I used to think she is a silly woman for not holding a grudge.
She was always nice to me. When I was pregnant she first congratulated me and even though she wasn’t invited to my baby shower, she sent me a diaper genie as a gift. I always felt guilty that I hurt such a pious woman.
To make it more complicated she is in a relationship with my cousin (45M). My parents love her. Uncle and aunt love her. Even my cousin’s kids love her. She never discriminated between her kids and mine. She always sends some cookies or extra food for my son with her kids whenever it is their visitation time. She even met my son and treats him like her own. For the longest of time I wondered why she is like this? Is she trying to win her husband back?
I even asked her why she doesn’t hate me when I was her husband’s mistress. She told me she doesn’t see the point because whether or not she hates me her marriage was over anyways. I am jealous of her. She is not just beautiful but also graceful. I know I was very much younger than her when my husband started the affair but I can say she is much more better looking than I am. Even if I took her place in her husband’s life but I can never be her.