struggling in a viscous cycle
I am struggling quite badly now and is caught in a cycle I can’t really get out from.
I am not making a lot and have been struggling to save money ever since the cost started raising.
Worst is, I am a “shopholic”. Not the kind that needs to spend hundreds or thousands just to have some kick but I tend to buy small items (stationeries/food/things below $10) whenever I feel unhappy.
I don’t feel happy with my life or job. I feel I am working so hard and I can only just afford a few small items here and there. I have to think twice whenever I wanted to buy something more than $50. I don’t know what I am working for because at the end of the day, after fulfilling my responsibilities, I have so little left.
I tried developing hobbies so I don’t need to get “satisfaction” from buying things but I feel little motivation.
I dread working more and more and started developing undesirable thoughts and then I have to scold myself to snap out of it.
I don’t know, I feel so stuck.