Daughters in law of Singapore, how is your relationship with your mother in law?
I (f28) am currently staying at my fiancés (m27) place together with his mother (f60). His parents have separated and his mom is very attached to him.
Before he met me, he would eat dinners with his mother every day and watch tv with her every night. She would also stay up late to wait for him in the couch. Now that he has me, he spends most of his time with me.
She treats me like invisible, only being cordial. The only ones she says to me are acknowledging my hellos. If I don’t greet her she would ignore me.
When she comes home, she speaks to my fiancé and offers him food only, without looking at me or offering even though I’m right next to him.
She has also been taking her time to look for a house after the divorce. She says things like she doesn’t want to stay with us after our marriage in our new house but her actions are the opposite.
In fact, she even claimed that hdb would reserve flats for divorced people and has been dragging on the process of getting a house by saying that she is emailing hdb and wanting to try for sbf instead of getting a resale.
When my fiancé stood up for me and said she could only stay till June next year, she got all passive aggressive and ask why he has to be so calculative with her. And even asked him why he gave me the assurance that she would be out in six months.
Why can’t she understand that all new couples want their alone time with each other? I wonder if being with a person whose mom is so attached to him will pose many more such problems in future.
My mother treats my fiancé really well and she shows us both love and care. I don’t know how I feel about my mil and if she is going to stay with us in our new home for at least six months, shouldn’t she at least make an effort?
Tl:dr My mother in law is treating me like invisible. I suspect she is secretly annoyed that I took her son from her.