Having met more than 10 different guys within the span of half a year, I just wanted to share some observations that hopefully may be helpful for you if you’re using apps!
#1 – never trust a guy blindly until he proves it with his actions over time.
If a guy tells you that he is looking for something serious, give him the benefit of doubt but don’t fully trust him until he proves it.
I’ve mistrusted the wrong guy who told me that he wanted to settle down but turned out he was just looking for FWBs. And his game was damn solid, the way he talked to me, treated me and planned our dates was NOT the typical trajectory of how a FWB relationship would usually look like. He would even spend hours talking to me on the phone everyday. In the end, he put out after I revealed that i was not that keen to proceed too fast physically.
#2 – Don’t ever dupe yourself into thinking a guy is interested in you if he texts you every day BUT doesn’t proactively initiate to meet you.
Most likely, this guy is just looking for a text buddy ???? Sometimes, us girls will try to cling on to the hope that if he carries on the convo, or even double/triple texts us when we didn’t reply instantly, he is interested. sure… but I think most importantly if he doesn’t actively tries to meet you, most likely he isn’t THAT interested.
From my experience, I have been texting this guy almost everyday for about 6+ months. During this 6+ months, I’ve dated others, some consisting of only 1-2 dates and two of them I’ve dated 1-3 months. Funny thing is, this 6months + guy was so-called the longest standing “date” but we have only met once ???? Ever since that one time we met up, he did drop hints on meeting again but never proactively plan a date. And a few times when I did not reply him, he will double text me again.
In the end, I decided to ghost for good cos’ I was too lazy to reply and I wasn’t interested enough either. But yes based on my experience, it’s quite absurd to me that someone can bother to keep tabs and text another person consistently for 6 entire months without even wanting to meet the person!!! But I guess the world is full of strange people with strange motivations.
#3 When they say that dating apps allow you to expand your social network and meet people you don’t usually encounter in your daily life, it’s true.. in a good or bad way depending on your luck.
I know I’ll get roasted (especially by guys) on the point below but i am sure most girls will agree with me
What I meant in my previous post about lowering my standards was because
1) honestly speaking, the amount of good looking girls on the apps way surpassed the amount of good looking Sporean guys who dress well on the app. I honestly don’t think I’m very picky already in terms of choosing someone based on his looks but the ”quality” of Sporean guys on the apps is really quite appalling. To the extent that out of 10 profiles, only 1 is average looking with a 5/10 rating looks wise. Sometimes it’s 0 out of 10 profiles who are average looking lol.
2) I think I’ve a bad habit of always trying to convince myself that maybe the person will look better in real life as compared to photo only to feel disappointed most of the time. I think part of me is just tired of restarting the whole process so I would rather meet this person I’ve been talking to for x number of weeks first and reevaluate from there.
so my naïveté & the fact that there’re so few decent looking guys on the apps prompted me to give guys I won’t even give a second glance, a chance. And I think most girls might be able to relate to this.