Listen, I need to get this off my chest because I’m sick of seeing every second Singaporean on my feed romanticizing “moving to Japan” like it’s some healing K-drama arc. I stayed there for a few years for work, and let me tell you, the “politeness” everyone raves about? It’s not kindness. It’s Tatemae.
In SG, if someone thinks your idea is stupid, they might just tell you “cannot lah” or give you a look. In Japan, they will smile, nod, say “it’s difficult,” and then proceed to block you behind your back for the next six months. It is psychologically exhausting. You spend 24/7 trying to read the air (kuuki wo yomu), and as a Singaporean used to being efficient and direct, it feels like wading through treacle.
And don’t even get me started on the work culture. We complain about OT in Singapore? Bro, at least in SG, when the work is done, you can mostly justify leaving. In Tokyo, I’ve sat at my desk staring at an Excel sheet for two hours doing absolutely nothing just because my bucho (manager) hadn’t left yet. It’s performative productivity. The hierarchy is so rigid it makes our NS chain of command look like a playground. You are a cog in a machine that hasn’t been oiled since the 90s. Yes, the trains are on time, but that’s because the person driving them is probably one minor mistake away from a public apology and a mental breakdown.
Say real, If you think you will be happy here forget about it. As a Singaporean you will probably be happier in China, Malaysia and Thailand.
As for the “anime” vibes? Forget it. You aren’t going to be the main character. You will be the “Gaijin” (foreigner) forever. Even if you speak N1 Japanese and follow every unspoken rule, you will always be an outsider. There is a very specific type of loneliness there that hits different when you realize the “politeness” is actually a wall to keep you at a distance.
I missed the “uncle” at the coffee shop who shouts my order. I missed the chaotic, direct honesty of a Hawker Centre. Japan is a beautiful place to visit for 10 days to eat sashimi and shop at Donki, but living there? It’s a slow grind of isolation masked by bow after bow. If you’re thinking of quitting your job in SG to “find yourself” in Japan, just go for a holiday instead. Trust me, the reality is not a Ghibli movie—it’s a silent, 12-hour office shift in a cold building where nobody says what they actually mean.