Throwaway account because I know this is going to get downvoted to oblivion by the corporate LinkedIn crowd, but I just need to say it.
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about the “uncles” we see around Singapore. You know the ones—sitting at the coffee shop all day, empty-eyed, maybe sometimes making a nuisance of themselves or crossing the line into being chi ko pek. As a woman, if an old uncle whistles or stares, I obviously don’t like it. I just ignore them and walk off. But lately, I’ve stopped feeling angry, and I’ve started feeling sad. I don’t think most of them are inherently bad or just “animals.” I think they are human beings who have completely lost any excitement or joy in life. They are just empty shells left behind by a system that drains you until you have nothing left.
It made me step back and look at life in Singapore as a whole, rather than through a hyper-focused lens of gender. Honestly, I feel like we overuse the term “feminism” way too much here. The conversation is always stuck on “what I deserve,” “fair treatment,” or corporate quotas. But instead of whining like a three-year-old every time things get tough, why aren’t we talking about the actual value of grit, merit, and just putting your head down to work harder?
Look at the current DBS CEO, Tan Su Shan. She is a woman, right? And she didn’t get to the absolute top of the biggest bank in Southeast Asia by constantly complaining about female rights or demanding a perfect work-life balance. I bet she worked her absolute ass off, built her results, and proved she was the best person for the job, period.
At the end of the day, the struggle in Singapore isn’t strictly about men versus women. The daily grind, the stress, the crushing cost of living, and the fear of the future—it hits all of us the same. When the world feels this heavy, crying for “fairness” doesn’t fix a broken corporate culture. Hard work, resilience, and actually looking out for the people around us do. We need to stop hyper-focusing on our differences and realize we’re all just trying to survive the same machine.