A degree graduate recently shared on social media about the difficulty of getting a job without any experience. Which made the graduate think if the “piece of paper” is worth it.

Here is the story:

We all know that studying for a degree is not cheap for both public and private schools. Some courses can even go to almost 6 figures. But is it really worth it?

I recently finished my Bachelor’s program and I have been job hunting for several months with zero responses. I am not picky at all, I applied for jobs that are above $2,000 which is not something of a high standard

I am not from a rich family, but my family has always been against me going for part-time jobs which resulted in me having zero job experience records in my resume. The only job experience I have is an internship that is pretty much useless.

What I want to bring across is that degrees are not as valuable compared to my parent’s time. Back in the 80s, a diploma was a big deal and my mom managed to get a job as a bank manager.

But in current times, a local degree also can’t get a job and a private one is even worse.

So my question is… Is it worth it to get into debt in order to get a degree?

Here are what netizens think:

The degree has always been a piece of “backup” nothing special.

Try applying for Govt job if you have a local degree, chances are they will take you.

You are right, in this day and age a degree is nothing more than a piece of paper. Job experiences are for the win.

My boyfriend keeps pressuring me to sleep with him.

This seems like a safe place to post so here goes. My boyfriend says he will leave me if I don’t get intimate and sleep with him.

We’ve been together for 2 years and before beginning a relationship I told him I wanted to wait for marriage, that is my choice btw.

Our relationship was fine but now he says he will leave me if I don’t sleep with him.

I love him but I still want to wait, but I also don’t want to lose him. My friends say i’m the problem and should just do it.

I know most people my age have done it already, im 18, but I just don’t want to.

Netizens’ comments

• You two aren’t right for each other. You want to wait and he doesn’t. That’s not going to change for him, and it seems like it won’t change for you either.

No point in trying to keep sailing if you’re already got a huge hole in your hull. You can only bail out water so fast..

• If you want to wait until marriage then wait.

No one should pressure you to sleep with them and you should never feel forced to do it. You won’t enjoy it and might regret it for years to come.

You’ll know when it’s the right time.

I previously posted here a long time ago, but here I am again because attempts to resolve the problem have not worked.

Background: So my father has been super paranoid and suspects my mother for adultery (which I’m pretty sure is not true). This is to the extent that my father will do crazy things like stalk my mother at her workplace and spam the alleged adulterers on Facebook with somewhat accusatory comments. His thoughts have absolutely consumed him and he has been rambling about this “adultery” for years! (and saying the exact same words each time like he was reading a script!) Marriage has been rocky from day 1 and mother has wanted to divorce multiple times in the nearly 30 years of marriage, but in the end my mother still stuck around to preserve the family unit for my sake (which in retrospect wasn’t a very good idea lol). And because father does not agree to divorce, they have to separate for 4 years before mother can file for divorce, but obviously we have all been living under the same roof. Looking at father’s behaviour, it’s very clear to me that he has some mental issues along the lines of ASD (no friends, extreme dedication to routine, low EQ, strange habits of talking to himself and stimming with hand gestures) and/or BPD (fear of abandonment explaining his reluctance to divorce, control freak mannerisms). Probably also had bouts of depression as I’ve heard him say he doesn’t want to live anymore.

What I’ve done: For now I’ve tried to go the wholesome route by trying to get him to get a mental health assessment so that we can address his issues and make life easier for everyone. I managed to connect him to the Family Service Centre so that he can talk about his problems, and I informed the counsellors to try and get him to have a mental health assessment. Unsurprisingly he refused. The contact has been going on for a few months, I don’t know exactly what happens at the sessions but it’s clear that he’s still as crazy as ever.

Looking forward: Well now I’ve more or less given up the wholesome route. He’s not helping himself by not cooperating. The FSC has not really been able to do anything as well. I definitely have to get away from the house with my mother to ensure our safety and well-being. It’s not just my mother who’s been subject to bad stuff, I’ve often been at the receiving end by being his emotional dumpster and getting stressed about things I’m not involved in at all, and being worried about others because he seems to be on the verge of going berserk on everybody and I am the final safety catch. His presence alone drains my mental health. Maybe I’ve even been traumatised to some extent because I sometimes shudder when I hear his voice. I see no way I can have a good life if he doesn’t get out of my life (there are many other reasons for this which I didn’t mention in this post). I know it sounds unfilial but then again, if I can pay him his current monthly salary in exchange for cutting contact with him, I would do it (maybe when I start working). Anyway, since he’s not helping himself, I guess there’s no other way other than for things to get ugly. Divorce is the number one priority I have for my parents now. Unfortunately my father has been very smart about preventing a divorce. There is very little evidence we have to justify the divorce without going through a 4 year separation. There is no adultery on his side, no physical abuse, no vices, etc. I intended the mental health assessment to have a secondary purpose of being used as a justification for divorce if we really went that route, but obviously we don’t have it, and I suspect he may have seen through the plan. I realise he’s also been very emotionally manipulative by constantly trying to brainwash us that a divorce would be impossible because my mother has been a bad wife and the judge would side with him, but luckily I’ve seen through him. Anyway, I would appreciate any legal advice on this matter, I am hoping that we will be able to expedite the divorce proceedings without having to do the 4 year separation thing, and perhaps some advice on how to best handle my father so that he can no longer cause distress for me and my mother’s family. Thanks.

I am 29F I grew up in a divided family, my parents hated each other forever. My dad has businesses and we weren’t close to being poor but he was cheap and never gave my mom any gifts or money.

Culturally, we don’t move out of our family’s house until marriage. But I got a good reason to get out of this house which is studying abroad. Now I work and live abroad alone, no friends and no family around. I worked so hard to get my masters abroad (my tuition was paid by scholarship) and got a job after that. Sometimes I get depressed and feel lonely then I call my mom she would just complain about my dad all the call and wouldn’t care about me at all.

Today she was complaining that dad doesn’t give her money and asked me to pay her bills there, she said that my brother 38M (he lives with her and doesn’t pay much) and only pays for the water and food and I need to help them. I told her that I pay my rent, and all bills, and I’m trying to save up to buy a car and paying for my driving lessons because I could not afford to learn it in SG.

I never ask them for money why would she ask me to pay their bills too especially since I don’t live with them?

She doesn’t listen to me when I say that, she ignores me and says that my brother pays some of the bills and I gotta pay part of it. I got really angry and told her that I won’t pay a single cent and I don’t owe her money and she hung the phone up on my face.

Am I an wrong for not wanting to send her money and being angry at her?

Here are what netizens think:

you don’t live there, you’re an adult with your own bills and rent to pay. She should be charging her son rent if money is an issue, not begging it off the child who is living independently

Supporting your family is always a choice that you make yourself. You’re not obligated to fund your family in any way.

if she doesn’t have enough money she needs to get a job/look for a higher paid job and ask the son who’s still home to contribute more. Just because something is cultural to your family doesn’t mean your obligated to do it.

but I hope I can get some input here. ????

I have a 4-room flat and my bf has an EA. Both of us bought this under single scheme last time.

We always think that once we get married, one of us have to sell one of the unit. But recently there are 2 agents told me 2 different things:

1. As long as both unit pass MOP (after 5 years), HDB won’t ask us to sell either unit. Agent A said that he called HDB and got this answer. However, we are skeptical.

2. Another agent said, by right, HDB will send us a letter to inform us to sell either unit within 6 months. However, there are many ppl take the “by left” option. As in, HDB isn’t firm on this.

Can any kind soul who have been in a similar situation shared some input?

We have been putting off the idea of getting married because we are not ready to let go of either unit, for sentimental and practical reasons ????

Here are what netizens think:

• Hmmmm of course you want to keep both unit la. Very practical. The fact you both can buy such units in the open market under singles scheme means you both are quite strong financially. So? Sell your Hdbs and buy private condo la. You both still have 2 units just that they are upgraded to private. Leave the Hdb for families who need them.

• It’s crystal clear that one couple can only own one HDB. Just a matter of time when you will receive the letter from HDB , asking you to dispose one.

• Once you get married, you become a family unit. So can only own 1 HDB. Meaning you will have to let go of 1 of the units, however practical or sentimental it is unfortunately.

• Even if the value of the unit has grown 1000%, if you do not realise the value, it will always be on paper, might as well recycle the value and constantly put it to good use to grow your networth. This is a more practical approach. If for sentimental reason, then you guys will just have to pick one. You can always consider after ROM since you have 6 months to sell. Otherwise one party will find themselves holding on to the short end of the stick should the situation deviate from your current plan.

What is it like visiting a prostitute? I am super curious

Closest I ever got to was standing outside a sleezy massage parlor in JB while my buddies egged me to go in. I was virgin and they were willing to pay for it. I was too paiseh to accept

That was many years ago. I am married with kid so I won’t ever try it, but still so many men around me have visited and I seriously feel like I am missing out. Can anyone shed some light please

1. In general, what is it like to visit one?
2. How do you even discuss the price?
3. What if you fail to climax?
4. What if you dislike the women you are assigned? E.g. she looks worse irl than in photo
5. Did you enjoy the experience?

Netizens share their experiences

1. For me, I went to scope the different houses first to see which one has the prettiest looking girls, and decided on one with thai girls.
   Got quoted $150 for 2 shots (back in 2018, haven’t been back ever since) and after that the boss will bring you to choose a girl that you like, with all the girls sitting behind a huge glass window.
   All of them are wearing number tags so you just choose which girl you want, like “I want number 5” or “i want number 69”.
   You can also ask the boss for recommendation on which girl is the best and he will make a suggestion.
   After that the girl will come out and hold your hand, leading you into one of the rooms where you will take a quick shower to wash yourself up, before she starts off the whole session with her “mouth”.
   Sometimes the girl will also lick you in your “behind”, but it really depends on the girl, and they will spray some disinfectant first before doing it.
   You then proceed with the deed, and depending on the girl, sometimes they will provide you with a massage after you finish and there is still some time.
   Then when time’s up, you shower and clean up before leaving.
   I don’t think the price can be discussed as geylang brothels are mostly fixed.
   If you fail to climax then bopian, nothing can be done.
   One thing to take note is never ever french kiss them, although some singapore men like to do it, because their mouths have “been very busy”.
   Better to play safe, even though they are regularly tested for any STDs.
2. I am like you. I’m always the one outside while my friends go in to try. I have a long-term committed girlfriend so prostitution is something I’ll never do.
   However, during my recent Thailand trip, I have had the chance to go inside one of the “Fish Tanks” with my friends. Like yourself, I was curious and just wanted to see how things were like. Ultimately, I left the premise while my friends enjoyed themselves.
   Here was my limited experience:
   • It is a nicely decorated lounge area where there are many nice sofas. You sit on one of the sofas and you WILL HAVE to order a semi-overpriced drink (can be water, coke or alcohol). This serves as your entrace fee. In front of the sofas is a stage with bright lighting where the girls are seated. They are all skimpily dressed.
   • Each of the ladies has a numbered and colored tag. The price of each lady is determined by the color of the tag. For example, Black is the most expensive. Once you see a lady you like, you tell the male-staff which girl you like and they will call her down and she will follow you back to a room after you paid. Just want to add, some of the expensive-tagged girls are really pretty, they are probably prettier than any other girls you know personally. I can understand why so many men fell into the beauty-trap of the Thai women.
   • I was told that you have a time-limit with the girl of 1-2 hours or 1-2 shots, whichever comes first.
   • You already saw the lady on the stage before picking her. So this shouldn’t be a problem?
   According to my friends… apparently so.
   Edit: Before anyone starts asking or critisizing my friends…
   1) they are single men, and they are very good friends of mine who went through thick and thin with me.
   2) They just so happen to be very unfortunate with genetic lottery (short, balding, out of shape, not handsome) and as a result, they don’t get much luck with our local ladies.
3. Like going to the doctor.
   At first you have a concern
   See already over in a few minutes
   Then bill come you faint
4. I only ever had experience from rentmen. Saw his profile and thought he was hot. Messaged him on WhatsApp to confirm price then he send me his hotel address. Met at lobby and brought me to his room. I placed money on the table then we got down to business
5. So as a 20 (M) youngster who wanted to lose my V card. I’m gonna put this post as my experience might save youngsters their important hard earned part time money. As any other curious young male who never lost his V card before and wanted too, I went to geylang.
   I was advised to try the vietnam brothel as their “tight and hygienic” I’ve only went once so I can’t say for sure about the hygiene part. Now the main part of the post, was it worth it? Personally and likely for majority males who have went before, no it was not. Firstly, the ladies there look great and work great. Respects to them for being nice and professional.
   But honestly, all of their efforts and kindness were wasted upon the condoms provided. Yes I understand that condoms are necessary for protection from STI and pregnancy BUT, the issue is the quality. It is HORRIBLE, I felt more for the unprotected BJ then the protected intercourse itself. It was so bad that my purchase ($120 for 1hr) felt wasted. I went limp couple of times, thankfully the prostitute was kind and gave me raw BJ (dangerous) to get me to be hard again. To summarise in short, you might wanna consider an escort over geylang prostitutes, unless you’re a cheapster.

it feels like he moved my organs. I just f-ed my bf, it was rough and since we finished I’m in unbelievable pain.

We are together for more than two years and we get rough in bed fairly regularly, he is really large down there and he often hit my cervix but it’s usually not so painful for me and I know what does that feel like but this is completely different…

It feels like he hit my ovaries or something, it feels like he moved something in there and it’s so painful especially when I move even a little bit…

does anyone knows why can that happen, I go to my gynaecologist regularly so I know that I’m healthy and that I don’t have any cyst…

I never felt anything like this before, it feels like the worst period cramp ever. There is no blood and we didn’t do anything unusual…

Netizens’ comments

1. Getting your ovaries knocked during deep penetration has been described as similar to testicular pain from blunt trauma. So, I suspect that is what you’re experiencing. His size down there might be a factor but Olympic-style f-ing can do this to any woman. YMMV but be careful with sport f-ing
2. Speaking as a girl who loves to get her brains fked out, my advice is if it ever gets painful, just have him ease up. “Too hard” does exist.
3. I got fisted one time and literally couldn’t walk for a week. Just swelling and cramps
4. Just be sure to pay attention to how long it lasts and how severe it is because if it lasts too long or prevents you from going about your life, you should seek medical attention.
5. Well… I hate to be the outlier here… But it could just be the lay of the land as it were. Give it time, lay on your back. Give it more time, and then try walking around. Things may settle.

What’s a day in the life of someone who is affluent?

I’m not rich and even if I “work hard” my entire life I’ll never be rich rich. Comfortable yes but rich nope.

But watching Korean dramas on Chaebols and stuff makes me wonder who is a day in the life the of the affluent in Singapore is like? This is by no means comparing or anything just curious on the lifestyle they lead. Also cause people always say they wanna be rich wanna be rich and by being rich you can truly find happiness so I’m curious on that aspect.

My friends will say stuff like “They can buy Chanel Hermes and many Rolex that’s why they’re happy!!” But if you’re rich rich, and you have that many Rolex, wouldn’t it come to a point where that watch is akin to how we ordinary folks view Casio and Seikos.

And say like if frequently eat at high end restaurants or Michelin food everyday, would it come to a point where they view that food similar to how we see our Nasi lemak and roti Prata since they have it oh so often? Like what’s luxury for us may be their every day.

Do you have friends or yourself is affluent? How’s your lifestyle like?

Netizens’ share their stories

1. Ah, my family’s rich, so maybe I can pitch in. I usually work office 8:30 to 6 on Monday to Friday, gym at Anytime a few times a week, meet friends on weekends and play games/read before sleeping.
   I notice that I don’t put much thought about getting grab or going to fancy bars/restaurants, but I still mostly eat at hawker or home cause it’s convenient.
   I have nice watches, but I usually just use my garmin and switch for events. I typically take the train and bus for work, but can drive if I don’t feel like it.
   When it comes to clothes, I don’t mind shopping at places like Balenciaga, but I’d usually just go to Uniqlo. Essentially, being rich doesn’t stop you from enjoying cheap things, but it does make you less reluctant to try out the expensive stuff.
   Overall, the nicest part is just the comfort of a safety net, so I never have to worry what would happen if things go wrong.
2. I have an acquaintance who is a taitai.
   According to Instagram:
   Morning = gym sessions then atas breakfast.
   Afternoon = fetch her kids from school followed by atas lunch at restaurants I’ve never heard of.
   Evening = hosting her friends at her semi d with wine and atas food for dinner.
   And also constant travelling since her kids are already in jc.
3. Well, I know a couple of people from families with old money.
   One goes to work anyway (lowkey white collar job) but also has properties, tenants, and manages the family’s investment portfolio.
   You will never think they are rich. They bring their own lunch to work and sometimes cook for their co-workers. Once in a while, they do go to nice brunches at places you have to drive to on the weekends.
   The other one doesn’t work but has private bankers work for them to make money. Work out at the gym in the mornings, play golf on the weekends, read up on investments, global news, etc. For meals, there is a variety. Usually take meals at home cooked by the maid… unless it’s a special recipe, then they make it themselves. Often hosts dinner at their place, usually private bankers, other well-connected people, family friends, etc.
   On weekends, dines at hawker centres, cafes or Michelin level type of restaurants. Generally, they do not spend money like water; they put it into investments.
   Again, you cannot tell they are rich from just appearances – well, unless they drove their car to meet you. I only knew the extent of their family’s wealth when I went with them to visit their parents’ estate one year.
   My take is that money amplifies and enhances your life. If you are sensible and level-headed, you will use money wisely and make it work for you. If you enjoy luxury goods and material things, you will spend money on that.
   Money cannot buy happiness but it definitely solves many problems that make life difficult.
4. I am not affluent nor do I know anyone filthy rich but I feel “rich people feel happy because rolex” is a tad over simplified.
   Yes luxury items come with diminishing return but they can also buy experiences. Won’t you be happy if you can quit the job you hate any time and go travel the world? Or try any niche expensive hobby like skiing or horseriding anytime you want to?
   Or if you’re feeling altruistic you can anytime donate to a cause, start a foundation or have the free Time to go volunteer.
   And another aspect is safety. Not having to worry about your mum’s medical bill or your children’s school fees is pretty happiness inducing or at least worry reducing I think.
   Of course I’m not saying all rich people are happy.
5. We had a towkay who gets chaffeured to office, every one jokes that he just turns on PC to check his bank account balances after reading his newspapers. Morning wait out hangover, his khakis come office sit down talk shit then go to lunch where the maitre d know u by name and u have special off menu dishes for u. A
   fter go country club, night time dinner then work begins at the KTV, gotta go thru the ang pais, but after all those news of ktv models dying of alcohol poisoning for big tips they don’t play so hiong anymore.
   Back to ur 11000 sqf minimum house. Repeat next day until one day u say ur sons hate u for never being there then try to salvage n be family man
   Next tier one maybe spend more time at the casino. One daughter’s sole occupation was to ensure her mother does not lose more than 250k usd a week. Bankers go to mbs for meeting with them.
   Biggest flex we witnessed was some rich ppl discussing flight out of SG, one offered another (foreigner) a ride with him to airport , response was I don’t think we going same direction, I going Seletar (private jet).