Should you leave your partner when their mom is dying?

I’ve (22M) been with my gf (21F) for almost 4 years. She took my virginity and is my first relationship, she was with others before me though not as serious.

I love her a lot, and we’ve been through a lot together.

But it’s been a lot of fighting, a lot of her saying it’s over, a lot of jealousy etc. I’ve been struggling with this for a while but finally understand that I’m losing feelings for her – against my will.

Should I break up with her even though her mom has cancer?

It breaks my heart because I can’t stand to see her sad and she’s in such a vulnerable situation right now.

We’ve tried so many times and our fights just keep getting worse. The alternative would be to somehow get my feelings for her back on track and fix our relationship but I don’t know how.

A guy shared a story of how he had wanted to date a girl that he always see around in the gym and proceeded to ask another guy (A) who was always hanging out with her if she was single.

(A) told him that they were only friends and he would help him ask the girl but while he was asking halfway, the girl mistook it as he was asking her out instead and told him that she has been waiting for him to ask her out for the longest time.

As a result, the guy accidentally became (A)’s wingman instead.

Here is the story

“At my gym over the past couple of months I’ve noticed a cute girl who works out around the same time I do and I was interested in asking her out, but I’m kind of awkward and I don’t approach girls in the gym.

A few times I’ve seen her talk to a guy (A) who she seems to be friends with, I haven’t seen anything romantic or flirtatious between them and I was pretty confident they weren’t together. So my awkward self decided to talk to (A) and ask him if she was single.

He said he had no idea, that they know each other because they used to work together, and have been friends ever since. As he was talking she came walking over to us, and before I could stop him he turned to ask her:

(Paraphrasing what I remember)

(A): hey are you single? Becau-

Her: God it’s about time! I have been waiting forever for you to ask me out.

(A): uh…

Her: …is that not what you were asking?

(A): yeah it is! Are you free Saturday?

Her: absolutely! Text me, I have to get going soon.

Throughout this I was just standing there like a third wheel watching like an idiot. After she left (A) turned to me with an apologetic look on his face and said he’d always had a crush on her but never acted because he didn’t want to hurt their friendship if she didn’t feel the same way.

I told him I completely understood and was happy for both of them.

All in all, -1 for me and +2 for them = net gain for love.”

A lot of people out there think that the human resources department will help protect the interest of the workers or employees.

But remember who is paying the salary of the human resources department it’s the company and not the worker.

The human resources department is a “for show” they will help here and there in minor situations but when the to complain is against the higher-up position in the company the Human resources immediately becomes the enemy of the implicated employee.

Here is one example

My friend got harassed by her boss as her colleague passed the hotel room key to him while my friend was drunk at a company retreat.

My friend rejected his advances for promotion and reported to HR.

HR then fired my friend for a made-up reason. That is very unfair and it’s an MNC.

Here are what netizens think:

• should really expose such scummy companies on social media.
• Pretty sure that would be illegal or borderline illegal. If this was in the last 6 years, you might consider following this up. Not a lawyer, but this doesn’t sound legal.
• You think HR will risk a wrongful dismissal arh. Unless it is a small company without proper HR policy.
• Well it sounds bad, but we are missing out a lot of the details that could change the big picture. But at the same time this kind of thing should more than just a disciplinary action from HR. This should easily become a police case and a very very expensive law suit.
• Don’t do naughty stuff with your colleagues unless you like to roll your dice, or you are as rich and powerful as your boss.

My elderly divorced aunt is having an affair with a married man.

Since my aunt (late 60s) divorced her husband 20 years ago, she has been having affairs with married men of similar age. All her past and current boyfriends share similarities like poor health, being financially stingy, low income, or retirement.

After her previous married boyfriend died from a heart attack, she found a new one quickly. As for the new bf, he is retired and has a wife and will come over to sleep at my aunt’s house some days each week.

The problem with this old man is that every time we go for dinner and family outings, my parents will have to pay for him and my aunt. He never once offered to pay for the meal, and when he previously visited my house during Chinese New Year, he would disrespect my family by smoking in the house. I told him before not to smoke, but in the subsequent year, he would secretly smoke on my balcony and throw the cigarette butt out the window without considering my neighbours’ safety. I shouted at him to stop smoking at my house, and since then, he gave me an attitude for half a year; until last week, he spoke to me nicely.

My mother will have a large-scale birthday party soon, and I know he will tag along with my aunt for the free food and free flow of alcohol at my family’s expense. Hence, I want to take this opportunity to settle this nonsense by expressing my true feelings to him and telling him to stay away from my family (aunt not included).

Please comment as much as you want, and any suggestions are welcome. Thanks.

Here are what netizens think:

• Pls talk to your aunt instead of confronting her bf directly at the party which could cause a scene and get ppl upset/ embarrassed. That would be the respectful way of handling things.
• Don’t invite her and the bf at all. Since the bday celebration is being hosted by u, u have all the rights to invite and not invite who to come. U can also reinforce to your other family member not to inform this aunt as well.
• I think ur aunt just want a companion partner but it comes with baggage (sick, bad habit etc). All of us has this baggage now or when we get older. I feel u should just leave your aunt alone unless she was abused by him. Let her enjoy her life.
• Call his wife to come collect her trash.

I moved out of my parent’s house when I was 22. My sister (25), on the other Hand, Has been living with our parents up until about 2 months ago.

She has always had the upper Hand in life, our parent’s baby the absolute special one. She doesn’t cook or clean. She doesn’t give them any money. All the money she gets, she spends on things like clothes and jewellery. If she were to save up, she could have a condominium or maybe even a house by now.

Our parents are extremely loving, but they can be pretty strict when it comes to specific things.

This is where her “Moving” Out comes in.

Our parents somehow found out about my sister’s job, in short, she sells her body to men. Not exactly sure what kind, but she’s in the prostitution business. I didn’t even know until they found out. They were absolutely pissed. So, they kicked her out.

My sister and I have a fine relationship. We aren’t close by any means, but we’re still sisters.

She calls me up and begs me to let her stay with me until this blows over. I say fine, because like, she’s my sister. I felt bad for her.

She shows up with several bags, and even some furniture she stowed away in her boyfriend’s place. I watch in awe as I see them unloading it into my home. I tell her that I can’t and won’t be able to accept her putting all this stuff in my house. She blows me off and tells me that I won’t even notice she’s there.

She never cleans up after herself. She’s staying in my second bedroom, and I don’t even wanna know how messy it is in there. There’s always plates piled onto the coffee table in the living room, cigarette buds in my candle holders, wrappers, garbage, dirty clothes, all over the floor. I’m constantly up cleaning after her because if I ask her to clean, she says she will and just never does.

She spends forever getting ready, her showers usually take like an hour and forty-five minutes. She’s driving up my water bill, and of course, if I ask her to be more mindful about the time she spends, she says she will be but just never does.

I could continue but I think you get my point.

I eventually put my Foot down and tell her that I can’t have her here anymore unless she starts acting differently. This is when she tells me she’s pregnant, most likely to get sympathy out of me. I offer to pay for her stay at a hotel that’s not too far away, but she declines because they aren’t up to her living standards.

Up until this point, my sister has been relatively passive towards me. But while I was helping her load things into her boyfriend’s car, she tells me that I’m the worst sister ever. She hasn’t called or texted me since and I don’t know how she’s doing, or where she’s staying.

I don’t even know if I’m in the right at this point. I feel like I could have done more to help her realize what her responsibilities are. Cause, in my Mind, she’s kinda like a child. Like our parents never disciplined her or taught her anything.

A man shared his story of how he got scammed for over $15,000 and warned others not to fall for the same trick.

Here is the story:

Chatted with the person for quite some time and got introduced to how she was making quick money by fulfilling orders on the site luisaviaroma.

Basically, the scam goes like this:
1. They provide you with a link to the product and ask you to transfer the amount to a given bank account (money mule). The given bank account names are both Malay names based on what I’ve experienced so far.
2. They start off with products that cost < $100 to bait you into thinking its a good deal
3. You make the payment and get the initial sum refunded plus a 5% commission.
4. Slowly the items get more and more expensive and the conditions suddenly change from 1 quantity to 3 quantity and they request that you make that payment twice.

I did not notice the change and only make the transfer for 1 item. They then contacted me that I’ll have to make the payment for the other 2 items (Which i did, thinking that I’ll get back my money).
Then later they told me that I’ll have to repeat the process again as it was a double order.

It then did i realised that I’d been in a scam all along.

When confronted, the scammer would make all sorts of excuses to get you to pay that balance amount. Even to the extent of offering to pay up to 10k of the balance amount).

IF IT SEEMS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE, ITS MOST LIKELY A SCAM, DON’T BE BLINDED BY GREED.. THIS WAS INDEED A PAINFUL LESSON TO LEARN.

I, (18F), have a boyfriend (19M). We’ve been dating for around 2 months. Our relationship together has been great so far.

Things go smoothly until I tell him about a guy from an entirely different state.

This guy is his age, in a band, and sometimes a bit of a mess mentally and emotionally wise, especially after a breakup he experienced 3.5 months back. I’ve been there, strictly as a friend, to support him and help him through times. Around a month after breaking up, this guy consistently flirted with me (only at night, which you know how that goes) and said things like appreciating my kindness, my patience, etc. To clarify, yes, this is before my boyfriend and I dated, however, he did know I liked my boyfriend at the time.

My responses were always dry.

I tell my boyfriend about these incidents. Complete mistake because every few days or so, if he even sees a single text on my phone from this different state guy, he’ll be upset for the entire day until I finally get him to tell me what’s wrong. It even gets bad if I briefly mention him. I think he wants me to stop talking to him but I mainly follow him to watch the progress of his band and send each other memes/videos. That’s all we ever do anyways when we text.

My boyfriend thinks the guy stopped flirting because he wants to get close to me, allowing himself to get “chance” from me even though that’s clearly not his intention. Should I just block him for the sake of a happy relationship?

Here are what netizens think:

• Doesn’t sound like your boyfriend has ordered you around or anything… What on Earth is the point of telling your partner about how a guy flirted with you about a month before you started dating though? It’s no surprise he’s wary of your friendship.

• this is huge red flag. If after 2 months he’s insinuating you having to cut ties with your long distant friend, and you do, then imagine after 6 months what he’ll expect for the ones much closer to you. Once all your guy friends are out of the picture he’ll move on to eliminating the girls because “they’re bad influences”. That’s usually how it happens anyway. Don’t let it.

• You’ve only been dating for 60 days and he wants to tell you who your friends should be? Not a good sign.

• your partner is trying to control your friendship with someone because of their own jealousy. This is not a good sign after only two months. If this is what they’re like now, be aware of attempts later on to stop you speaking with, meeting or hanging out with other male friends.

Hi, I’ve had this one on my mind for a while, and I just need advice on what to do, but I do feel like an a-hole for what I’m doing behind my mom’s back.

I will move to my bf’s place for good…

My mom (34) and I (16 at the time) had an argument. My dad had thought I was hiding something from them, because I wasn’t showing him my phone immediately. i was in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend of three months at the time. I didn’t want my parents to find out because my boyfriend is half Thai, half white. My parents do not want me dating someone who is not chinese.

My mom had a history of bad experiences with white guys and she told me she did not want me to dating a white man because she didn’t want the same thing to happen to me. My dad on the other hand is very racist against everyone.

On to the argument, my dad had went to the bathroom, and my mom was left interrogating me asking what I was hiding. I told her I had a boyfriend because she threatened to take everything away from me if I didn’t tell her. She seemed relieved, and asked his name. I told her his name and her immediate question was “is he a foreigner?” And I nodded. She immediately told me to break up with him and that “I shouldn’t be doing that.” I told my mom I would break up with him, but I never did.

I do feel guilty for lying to my mom, but I’m very in love with my boyfriend. We’re both young (17) but he’s been by my side more than my parents have.

We constantly face time, text, play games etc. Whenever we get into an argument he never yells at me and we communicate correctly. It’s us vs the problem, as we describe it. My dad has made inappropriate comments towards me, and I would tell my mom and she blew it off and said “he sees you in me, don’t pay attention to it he doesn’t mean it” I think I do resent my parents because of that. There’s more like not taking my mental health seriously, constantly treating me like a child, and sexualization from my dad. I resent them for all of that and I feel guilty because they are my parents.

My boyfriend treats me very well. Has been there for me, never has called me out of name, and does everything he can to make me happy. I do not want to break up with him, but I feel like I’m the asshole for going behind my moms back and resenting her. I know what she’s been through, but I do love him with all my heart and feel like I should be allowed to love who I love. Regardless of how my parents feel. Am I the asshole?

I (31M) took my terminally ill friend’s virginity before she passed

Today is her one year anniversary since she passed and I can’t stop thinking about her. She was my friend for 6 years.

Her cancer came back aggressively, she told us she doesn’t want to go through chemo again so she planned to enjoy the time she had left.

Before that she was also kind of a homebody who was only close to a small group of friends which was us.

One night when we were all drinking she admitted to me she was still a virgin but she doesn’t want to lose it to just any stranger. At least somebody she trusts before she goes.

That person was me. She didn’t force me to do anything I didn’t want to, she asked but was willing to drop it and pretend it never happened if I decided no.

We decided to make it extra special. Got a nice hotel room, got those fake candles all over the room to make it more “romantic.”

Was the first time I ever slept with someone I loved but wasn’t in love with if that makes sense. It was still a very intense experience.

Not in a bad way. There was still lots of emotions. Even though she seemed so happy she got to lose her virginity to someone she trusts part of me wonders if I did take advantage. If I was wrong for saying yes.

It’s just hard because I miss her so much. But I’m still glad at least I got to give her something before she left.