Is it just me or Singapore is getting even hotter?

I knew Singapore was getting hotter but I didn’t expect what was to come this year.

Usually I try not to use air-con but since the start of the year I literally have had to turn on the ac for most of the day, even at night, if not my room becomes a furnace.

Anyone else feeling the same? How often do you turn on your air-con?

Netizens’ comments

• it’s freaking hot… i don’t have an air con in my room, some nights i really couldn’t sleep despite maximum my fan speed

• It is super super hot. I used to stay away from the outdoors at 11 30 onwards to 330 cos you can feel the heat of the sun.
  Now by 930, you can feel the heat of the sun. It’s insane. We used to have more huge green land parcels. It’s next to nothing now. And we used to have huge rain trees for shade. Now we have thin narrow trees lining the roads. It’s damn hot.
  It’s concrete jungle everywhere and you can feel the heat radiating from the roads. Last time all schools had no aircon. Now they do have some aircon in some classrooms. Also buses, bus interchange, all shops in your town centre. Also town centres used to have shops. Now you have a mall using aircon throughout. Aircon makes the surround hotter.

• no aircon and never open windows also. ok lah. used to it.

The collective use of aircon makes the country’s temperature even worse so even if I could breathe without my nose getting blocked, I will not contribute to the rising temperature as far as I can help it

This really creepy thing happened and we don’t know what to do. Can someone please give me advice

Hey guys, me and my girlfriend moved to a new apartment at the beginning of this year. We are both very sceptical about ghosts/paranormal activities etc. But after the last few days we are both really on edge. I would like to get your guys opinion because we both don’t know what exactly to make of the situation and what to do now.

It began a few months back when me and my girlfriend were lying in bed talking and suddenly my girlfriend just froze and started breathing very heavily. I asked her if everything was okay and the only thing she could do was shush me. After 3-4 minutes she told me she saw a woman right above me just staring at me the whole time. We didn’t really think anything of this it was sort of just a creepy experience. However more of these so called sightings have happened in the past few weeks. It’s always a girl looking at me or a man in the corner of the room trying to make contact with my girlfriend. Still we always just blamed it on sleep deprivation because we do tend to party a lot and sleep late.

This was until two days ago. I was in bed with my girlfriend again and the same thing happened. She saw a guy in the corner waving at her. Because I didn’t really believe in ghosts or anything I started to make a few jokes (not too kind I know but I was really sceptical at the time). My girlfriend told me I really should be quite for a moment. After she said this I saw a look in her eyes which I will never forget. She grabbed my arm very tightly and after about 1 minute she said she had the feeling that something had scratched her. We do have 2 cats but they were both not in the room with us. After talking for a while I looked at her shoulder and yes: I saw a really big scratch mark on her shoulder. This was the moment that I knew something was not right. After doing some research the following day we agreed that we would just not make any jokes about it and ignore it for as much as we could.

Well tonight the real horror began. After watching a movie and falling asleep peacefully I am woken up by my girlfriend shaking in bed the whole time. After not responding for a minute she started to suffocate. I ran to the lights to see what was going on. Luckily she woke up and after asking if everything was okay she told me that she saw everything happen from te corner of the room where she normally sees the man standing. She had the feeling that she was being pulled into some other space. She didn’t know what is was but the only thing she knew was that she definitely had to avoid this space.

After talking for a few minutes (keep in mind my girlfriend was really scared the whole time) my girlfriend turned to me really casual and said: “babe let’s just go to sleep.” I was weirded out by this a lot because she had been panicking for the last few minutes. I also saw a really calm, yet aggressive glance in her eyes. I told her I wanted to turn the lights back on and talk for a bit. However she just kept on pushing me to go to sleep. I had the feeling something was terribly wrong so I tried to test her reaction with a few jokes that we always make with each other. She didn’t react AT ALL. She just kept saying “it’s fine let’s go to sleep. My girlfriend HATES laying on her back and here she is laying on her back the WHOLE time. I really did not know what to do. After having the same conversation with her for 15 minutes with me wanting to turn the lights on and her reacting in a really firm way saying I SHOULD go to sleep now. She just turned around and started shaking again. I ran to the lights and as soon as I turned them on I saw her normal look again. The most terrifying part of all is that she did not remember a single part of the conversation which literally happened 10 seconds before!!

We are now both sure that there is something here with very bad intentions.

I am just really looking for advice about what to do with this. If anyone has had any similar experiences in the past please tell us what you did to make this nightmare go away.

Netizens’ comments

• Move out NOW

• That might not be a ghost. It might be something worse. I’m worried for your girlfriend. Could you two stay anywhere else for a couple of days?

• that is something evil, not a ghost, you should leave that place.

I (33f) just got engaged to Eric (35m) this last Tuesday. My sister Ann (30f) and her fiancé Dean (35m) are getting married this Saturday. We have an older brother named Luke (37m). Fake names and account because Ann follows my other one.

I told everyone in a mass text, including Ann, that Eric proposed to me at the restaurant we went to on our first date. I noticed everyone except Ann responded right away. She answered the next day with congratulations. She said she was busy putting together final arrangements for her wedding. Okay, no big deal.

However, right after that message, she sent me another one asking that I not talk about my engagement. I asked why, and she said she’s spent over a year stressing over the wedding and hasn’t seen our family in that time, so she wants it to be about her and Dean. She asked that we wait until the day after to discuss my engagement.

I said that’s ridiculous and that we can talk about both, plus people will be asking me about my engagement, anyway, as they already know. She said she expects that, but then the conversation needs to go to her because everyone is coming to celebrate her and Dean, not Eric and me. But I haven’t seen our family (parents and older brother) in the same amount of time, and I want to use this time to talk about my engagement, my ring, and our own wedding plans. I’m excited and this is the only chance I’ll get to do it.

Ann told me it’s not about me, and “reminded me” that with her rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, and girl get togethers (her bachelorette, nail appointments, etc.), she wants to talk about just her wedding and everything she’s been doing. I told her not everything is about her, and I should be allowed to talk about my engagement, too. I said I want her to help me plan mine since she’s just done it, and we could use this time for her to show me how to plan a wedding, but she said no, and that it’s not about me.

Then our brother Luke texted me and told me I was being ridiculous.

I said Ann was being a bridezilla thinking everything is about her, but he said she has a right to want week of her wedding to be about her. I’m not saying the wedding day can’t be about her, but she doesn’t own the days leading up to it. I want to show off my ring and talk about my wedding. She hasn’t had the chance to show everyone her ring in person, either, because our family is spread out, but I think we can do that together.

Eric agrees that Ann is being self-centered, but Luke thinks I’m trying to steal the spotlight and to let Ann have her moment. I don’t see why we can’t do everything together.

My [26M] fiancée [25F] doesn’t want to contribute financially anymore after our engagement
We’ve met in college 7 years ago. When we first started going out to dates she would reject my attempt to pay the bills in full and insist we should split or each pays for what he ordered. I wasn’t expecting that because in Morocco it’s usually the guys who pay for the dates but since she insisted I said okay.

She would do it for regular dates (restaurant, coffeeshop, parks…) and also when we started going out for vacations. For example if she didn’t have money with her and I paid for something no matter how cheap it is she would give that amount when we next met.

Last summer we were on a vacation and in the last day of the vacation I had to cancel the flights because of an expected family business in the city we were visiting. We stayed for 3 more days and I’ve paid for both our hotel rooms and new plane tickets. Next time we met she gives me the money for the plane ticket and her hotel room but I refused to take them since it was because of me that we had to stay for more days than planned. But still she didn’t accept my refusal and I insisted that I take the money.

Even when talking about scenarios in the future she would still split the costs. When we were in a retail store and we saw a refrigerator, washing machine, dishwasher pack and we agreed that it was a good deal she says “And it’s only cost 13000 each!!!” (the total price was 26000). Also, when talking about our future kids and discussing names and how are we going to raise them, when we started talking about schools she says “I know a school close to work. I’ve heard it’s good and it’s only 2000 per month so it’s 1000 each, and that includes the bus and lunch fees”

We got engaged last December and have the wedding in the summer. In the last two months we’ve started shopping for furniture and appliances for the apartment and I’ve noticed that she expects me to pay a much higher percentage than her in pretty much everything. She even refuses to pay anything for the TV because she doesn’t watch it.

Whenever I try to bring the subject up she ignores me or get defensive/dismissive whether by pretending she is tired, changing the subject, busy by work or trying to sweet talk me. We’ve had some pretty heated argument over the years but we could always sit and talk face-to-face and try to tackle the problems as a team, something that she can’t do when I bring this subject.

It’s not like she is struggling financially. She has a well paying job and she doesn’t provide for her parents (nor do they need her too) and she still buys very expressive stuff. Paying her share wouldn’t even affect her financially or downgrade her lifestyle.

I don’t have any problem to be the sole financial provider in our relationship but this sudden 180 degree change is something that I can’t understand especially coming from someone with her principles.

I’ve told my best friend about this and he says that I should cancel the wedding and run as far as possible from her because if she changed this much after the engagement who can say how much she’ll change after the wedding.

I don’t what to do or how to approach this any differently than what I tried by talking to her and at this point I don’t even know if I am with the same person I’ve been with all this time.

My boyfriend keeps pressuring me to sleep with him.

This seems like a safe place to post so here goes. My boyfriend says he will leave me if I don’t get intimate and sleep with him.

We’ve been together for 2 years and before beginning a relationship I told him I wanted to wait for marriage, that is my choice btw.

Our relationship was fine but now he says he will leave me if I don’t sleep with him.

I love him but I still want to wait, but I also don’t want to lose him. My friends say i’m the problem and should just do it.

I know most people my age have done it already, im 18, but I just don’t want to.

Netizens’ comments

• You two aren’t right for each other. You want to wait and he doesn’t. That’s not going to change for him, and it seems like it won’t change for you either.

No point in trying to keep sailing if you’re already got a huge hole in your hull. You can only bail out water so fast..

• If you want to wait until marriage then wait.

No one should pressure you to sleep with them and you should never feel forced to do it. You won’t enjoy it and might regret it for years to come.

You’ll know when it’s the right time.

my girlfriends poor hygiene is ruining our relationship

I (21F) have been dating my girlfriend (21F) for 6 months. I am really deeply in love with her and really think we could spend the rest of our lives together except for one big problem: how she looks.

I know it sounds so shallow, and the last thing I want is to force her to be something she isn’t or make her feel bad about her appearance but it’s really starting to effect me. I’m embarrassed to be seen with her in front of people I know, and I’ve had some comments made to me already about how she looks and even smells. Mortifying.

To preface, I have always been very concious of my appearance. I am always clean and tidy looking, never unpresentable. Even on my off days I’m somewhat put together. I shower everyday, and don’t generally struggle with acne or body odour. I am not gorgeous or perfect by any means, but I definitely fit the feminine beauty standard. I am mindful of looking nice, and feel best when I put effort into my appearance. I certainly don’t expect everyone to put the same effort into their app arance, but being clean is definitely a must. I have definitely made lots of excuses for my girlfriend because I just love her so much, but I think I need to be honest with myself.

My girlfriend doesn’t shower much. she seems to think she’s still clean after 4 days of not showering when her hair is nearly sticky with grease. She’s a big girl and quite active in her daily life, so I can understand a little sweat. But by my standards, if you’ve worked up a sweat then you need to shower, right? She seems to think she doesn’t smell bad at all and doesn’t wear deodrant, but I’ve never met someone who needs it as badly as she does. She has quite strong body odour, but seems to not be bothered to do anything about it. Even though I’m so attracted to her, I struggle to ignore the smell and it’s definitely a mood killer. I’ve tried to be subtle by gifting her deodorant and perfume, and always complimenting her if she smells good, but she just says she can’t smell it so she doesn’t care and that I’m just being picky.

She struggles also with cystic acne. This would be fine if she didn’t pick at it all the time, even in public. I’ve caught her eating the pus from her zits, she doesn’t even seem to know she’s doing it. A friend of mine even mentioned that she saw her eat her zits, that was her first time meeting my gf so obviously a huge turn off. Undeniably gross. She refuses to do anything about getting her acne treated, despite it taking a toll on herself esteem. I don’t get why she won’t just see a doctor for it when it makes her feel bad about herself.

She tries to do her makeup but that only makes it worse. She never really learned to do makeup in a traditional sense, and instead uses it in a more artistic way. She uses bright colours on her eyes and lips, with nothing for her skin. Despite her best efforts she usually ends up looking clownish. I love how much she enjoys using makeup to express herself, but I’m honestly mortified to go out with her like this. I can hardly take her seriously, my friends don’t seem to get how I find her attractive at all. In particular, she’ll put makeup on when she hasn’t showered and her hair and skin are visibly greasy, which looks unfortunate and ridiculous.

She also isn’t very bothered about her clothes. She is very climate conscious, and thrifts most of her clothes. She likes bright colours and wants pieces that are comfortable for her active lifestyle. Despite the fact she loves to express herself through her colourful clothes, she doesn’t put much to fort into dressing. Her shirts are always crumpled, her pants stained, and she has holes in socks and underwear. Not to mention there’s cat hair all over EVERYTHING. Even though I wouldn’t wear bright colours I love that they make her so happy, and think they really suit her! I don’t expect her to change her aesthetic to match me or any of that shit, I’d just like for her clothes to look like they’ve been washed at some point.

I’ve tried my best to encourage her to be clean. I praise her lots when she showers, I always comment on how fresh she smells or how fluffy and shiny her hair is. I’ll wash her clothes and iron them if i get a chance. I’ll even entice her by inviting her to shower with me. I’ve made it very clear that I’m attracted to her most when she’s fresh and clean, but it’s not enough. She’s barely presentable most days of the week, somuchso that I’m embarrassed to be seen or associated with her.

I feel so guilty about saying any of this but it weighs on me so much. Aside from her hygiene and appearance, she would be my perfect partner. When she does shower and have clean clothes she looks so extremely beautiful and fresh, I’m so attracted to her. But that’s only a minority of the time. I hate that it sounds like I want to change her, but I don’t feel like I’m asking for a lot, I just want to date someone CLEAN. Writing this post makes me upset, I really cherish our relationship but her cleanliness is just ruining it all.