dad died, quit my job.

everyone says “if you need anything let me know” but they never really seem to mean it. my father passed a few months ago while i was working, management let me cover my shifts and spend a few days with my family and attend the funeral.

i was scared that theyd fire me for walking out of my shift when i got the call, since no managers were there at the time and they already had a “chat” with me about calling out for genuine health issues, but my coworker called the facility owner and let her know why i left.

when i got my shifts covered, i let my coworkers know that the funeral was tuesday and id be back on wednesday.

tuesday night my manager still texts me and asks when ill be back. immediately after i got in the car after the service.

i dont think it was intentional, she probably forgot that id said that, but it really REALLY hurt for her to seemingly prioritize that awful job over me being able to grieve and mourn my father.

i took off again about a week later, and my manager said “can you just come in for an hour until i get there at least?” despite describing why i couldnt come in, as it was also related to my father’s passing.

i emailed them my resignation notice later that day, and when i told my coworkers they said “were glad you did it first, because the facility owner said she was gonna fire you if you came in tomorrow, she said because she ‘doesnt know how reliable you are’.”

im still pissed about it. the owner was the first person to message me and tell me to reach out if i needed anything, but when that means prioritizing my personal life over her poorly run facility god fucking forbid.

I’ve been with my boyfriend now for a year and in all in things are great but in bed, I’m not satisfied.

He struggles to locate my cl-t and stimulate it properly, I have told/shown him at least 3 times the easiest way to locate it yet he still doesn’t follow the instruction.

When it comes to stimulating it, he complains that his wrist hurts. I have shown him many times how I touch(it is not remotely strenuous for me to finish, I can usually after 2 mins)

so I have no idea how he is managing to hurt his wrist. I suggested he needs to find a position he is comfortable in but he still struggled.

Recently he started suggesting ideas that I was not really into (such as mmf 3 ways/face f-ing) , I explained that I wanted my pleasure to be the priority before we start exploring other things

he got annoyed and said that I was only caring about myself when there was lots of other things to enjoy. I told him I agree but having an experience that lessens my chance of finishing such as sleeping with a total stranger that doesn’t know my body, doesn’t appeal much.

We came close to me coming early in the year, on one occasion he made me come almost 3 times but he shifted from where he was and l lost it. It’s as if he decided to give up as he was doing well before.

Last night we had a discussion where he had asked if I came with other people and I did tell him, 4 men have made me come previously which he was surprised by.

I felt frustrated as he mentioned a fantasy of his was for me to finish with another man in a mmf despite me telling him this is impossible for me (I’m 33 and by this point know my body very well).

I told him that I wanted to focus on getting off in a way that I knew I would be able to have and that I know gives me a lot of pleasure but he seems almost reluctant to provide me with this.

I’d like to emphasise I’ve been extremely direct in showing him exactly what I need in the kindest way possible but it’s as if he wants to prioritise a fantasy over how my body actually works. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

I (43F) just lost my virginity. How do I tell my husband (44M) that I want to end our marriage?

My husband has been my best friend for 30 years, married for 25. He has felt no interest in intimacy since as long as he can remember.

Our relationship has been one of absolute loving, cuddly but celibate best friends, and while unusual, has been satisfying and worked for us.

This weekend I attended my 25th school reunion. I stayed with “Eve,” my best female friend from back then. I’m not going into details here, frankly I haven’t even processed it all yet…we made love several times.

I had my first ever experience, I felt desired, I felt authentic, real, alive. Neither Eve nor I planned or expected this. I’m shedding a lot of self-deception, determined to actually live my life now.

I’m ready to lose some friends and family, but the thing is, my best friend/husband/confidant is totally innocent in all this, and for two days I haven’t slept much, etc, and he’s sensing something is weighing on my heart.

How on Earth do I ask to just switch him to best-friend? This sucks. Thanks for listening or any advice.

Netizens’ comments

1. You tell him. There are no magic words, you just tell him.
2. My first marriage ended when my ex wife realized she was gay and had an affair with a girl. I’m speaking from experience when I tell you that honesty and sensitivity to what he’s going to go through are what matters here.
   If my ex could have just owned up to it, I would have gotten over it pretty quickly. Her being gay actually made the whole thing easier in a way. It explained so much and relieved me of so many emotional burdens (“why can’t I make her happy?”, etc).
   But the lying… That made everything awful, and it took years to recover.
3. This must be really difficult. Cheating, regardless, is a bitter pill to swallow if he expects you to be faithful to him and vice versa. Have you discussed these feelings with him? Has he said it’s okay for you to act on these feelings?

My boyfriend secretly took the condom off… so i thought.

I have no one I’d like to talk to about this so I’m going to just drop this here.

My boyfriend (m 26) and I (f 22) have been together for almost 4 years now. About a year ago I decided to get off my birth control pill (side effects) and we agreed to use condoms exclusively.

We’re both still studying and have no intention of starting a family in the foreseeable future. So two days ago, we slept together. I put the condom on him so I’m 1000% sure it was there. We’re going… going… then i feel him rush out of me and then there’s baby batter running down my leg.

He makes this big show of looking for the condom trying to find it etc. and I can do nothing but watch him in bewilderment.

He can’t find the condom??? That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever heard. He’s checking the floor, the blankets ughhh. He’s laying me on my back cosplaying a gynecologist talking about “IS IT IN YOU STILL???”

Naturally, I ripped him a new one because we agreed to use condoms and he took it upon himself to not use one halfway through.

Fast forward to today, I’m having some ~me time~ before my shower. I’m two fingers deep and something feels .. off. After a little searching and digging, I pull the freaking condom out from inside me.

so uh yeah. i just needed to vent this whole ordeal to someone. I appreciate your time

Netizens’ comments

1. I knew a girl in university whos boyfriend found out she was cheating by finding a condom in her… I’m shocked to this day.
2. Had something similar happen once. We thought we “lost” the condom. In our panic to find it, it took us 20 minutes to realize it had broken and rolled down.
3. Girl… go apologize
4. Tell him that you are sorry and that you found it.

Advice needed

Genuine post looking for advice, no bashing please. My wife and I are in our mid to late thirties with 2 kids, a preschooler and toddler. I am working (~70hrs a week) whilst my wife has quit her job to look after her kids. We have a full-time helper. My wife would often complain that she gets little support from me around the house. I try to help/spend time with the kids when possible but it’d be fair to say my wife manages the kids the large majority of the time.

Whilst there is no doubt about the importance of a father in a child’s upbringing and spending time with the kids is enjoyable, I find it tiring that she believes she lacks support from her hubby and therefore lacks time for anything else. Looking to see if I should change my perspective. Thank you.

Here are what netizens think:

• I don’t understand the people here. His wife is not working and has a full time maid. I think the husband has the right to rest as he does his part by bringing the dough. What the husband can do is, AT LEAST just spend half an hour with children everyday (no hps) and half hour for wife alone. If he can spend more time, all the better. But he needs to come back home to feel safe and relaxed.

• Husband working 70hrs a week , have a full time maid and the wife just doing the rest. Wow!! Wonder what else you can do after work after working 70hrs a week, which is to rest ! (70hrs is like working close to 12hrs a day for 6 days) You wife should join hand with you to take care of the family financials , so you can work lesser hours instead of 70hrs a week.

• It make sense that as she is not working and got maid to help her take care of things. She took care of the kids,the maid took care of house chores and you took care of the finance for everything. Isnt that fair and square? But then if you dont spend time with kids, please do even if its a short time. They need to know that you also care for them besides ur wife. About house chores daily cannot la, you work 12hrs already sure go back tired and have little time. Maybe on ur rest days just spend abit of ur time to help out or bring ur family out. But if ur tired and need that off day to have enough rest, she needs to understand. Have a conversation with her

The recent tender exercise that concluded on Wednesday showcased a significant decline in Certificate of Entitlement (COE) premiums across all categories. This article aims to provide a comprehensive understanding of the COE system, the notable decreases in premiums, their implications on various vehicle categories, and the broader impact on the automotive industry.

Introduction to COE

Certificate of Entitlement (COE) is a quota license that grants the legal right to own and use a vehicle in Singapore. The COE system regulates the vehicle population by controlling the number of vehicles on the road, ensuring efficient land use and managing traffic congestion.

The latest tender exercise witnessed substantial drops in COE premiums, notably in the categories for larger, more powerful cars, electric vehicles (EVs), and the Open category. The Category B COE premiums saw a remarkable 26.67% decrease, settling at $110,001 from the previous record of $150,001.

Overview of COE Premiums Drop in Latest Tender Exercise

The various categories, including Category A for smaller, less powerful cars and EVs, and the commercial vehicle COE premiums, also experienced significant reductions. For instance, Category A saw a 9.73% decline, marking the first time it fell below the six-figure mark since August.

Impacts on Various Vehicle Categories

The plunge in COE premiums profoundly affects different vehicle categories. The substantial drop in the larger, more powerful cars and EVs category indicates potential changes in consumer preferences and industry dynamics.

The Open category, primarily utilized for bigger cars, observed a 20.88% decrease, reflecting a considerable shift in market demands.

Significance of Price Drops in COE Categories

The decrease in COE premiums presents several implications. It signifies potential benefits for consumers, making vehicle ownership more affordable, and indicates shifts in industry dynamics. Additionally, the decline in COE prices could stimulate sales and reinvigorate the automotive market.

Explanation of COE Quota System and Its Effects

The recent tender exercise operates under a new three-month quota period from November to January, contributing to a more substantial COE supply. This change in the quota system is expected to affect the dynamics of COE pricing.

Factors Influencing COE Premiums

Economic factors, government policies, and market trends significantly impact COE premiums. Understanding these factors helps in analyzing the fluctuations and predicting future trends in the COE market.

Impact on the Automotive Industry

The plummeting COE prices trigger shifts in the automotive industry, influencing sales forecasts, marketing strategies, and industry adaptation. Manufacturers and dealers might adjust their approaches to align with these fluctuations.

Public Reaction to COE Price Fluctuations

Consumer responses to COE price changes play a pivotal role in predicting future market behaviors. Observing public reactions provides insights into market sentiments and preferences.

Pros and Cons of COE System

While the drop in COE prices benefits consumers, it also raises discussions about the effectiveness and fairness of the COE system. The system’s strengths and weaknesses are subjects of debate in public forums.

Potential Future Scenarios

Forecasting future COE premiums and their impact on different vehicle categories is crucial in understanding market dynamics and consumer behaviors.

Global Perspective on COE System

Comparing Singapore’s COE system with similar regulatory frameworks worldwide provides insights into its uniqueness and effectiveness.

Environmental Impact and COE Allocation

The role of COE in promoting environmentally friendly vehicles, particularly EVs, contributes to Singapore’s sustainability goals. COE allocation strategies play a role in shaping the country’s environmental commitments.

Regulatory Measures and Future Changes

Considering potential policy changes and adaptations to the COE system is essential for maintaining a dynamic and responsive regulatory framework.

Community and Expert Responses

Gauging the opinions of industry experts and the community about COE price changes can shed light on anticipated market behaviors and industry adaptations.

Conclusion

The recent decline in COE premiums across all categories signifies a significant shift in Singapore’s automotive landscape. While these reductions bring potential advantages for consumers and the automotive market, they also raise discussions about the fairness and sustainability of the COE system. The COE landscape continues to evolve, driven by market dynamics, regulatory changes, and consumer preferences.

I cheated and I don’t think I’ll forgive myself

ldk if anyone will see this but I think it’ll help if I just text this out. I was in a relationship with one of the most beautiful human beings I’ve ever met, we were together for a year and I made a mistake and sent explicit pictures to somebody, I’ve never seen or met before.

I was honest and I told her and it broke her heart it broke my heart, that I could cause so much pain to somebody, especially her.

Her and I were best friends she felt like home, and now I can’t even talk or see her. It’s her birthday today, and I’ve already given her presents at her door and I have done all I can to try to get her back.

But I’m starting to realize I probably never will. I don’t want sympathy, I can’t imagine what she feels like.

We loved each other so much and It’s my fault I ruined it. It’s hard to forgive myself for that, but I try not to think about her or what I did. But i see her in my dreams and in my mind and I will never forget her.

I’ve grown so much these past couple months and just realizing certain things I need to change. One thing that hasn’t changed though is the love I have for her, she’ll always have a place in my heart and I’m just grateful to have known her to even hold a conversation with her.

She chose me and I chose dishonesty and Betrayed my best friend. Idk if I’ll ever get over her but I hope I can, I hope she can get over me, I hope she’s healing in a healthy way.

It’s been 3 months since we broke up. And I’d be lying if I told you I don’t want to see her, but I mean this like MEAN this I would give ANYTHING to see her again anything…but maybe it’s for the best that I don’t.

This is a warning to anyone that thinks about cheating or doing something like I did, take time for yourself and figure out what you want before you break your partners heart like did.

It’s something that you will never want to experience. for her and for me

Netizen’s comments

• Why did you decide to send those photos to a stranger? Not judging you just curious as to why someone would do that.

Realistic advice for soon-to-be-married

Hi all, just want some realistic advice here.

I’m in a 6 years relationship with my fiancé and we are getting married soon.

So far he has been hanging out with my family more regularly (around once a week), and my family loves him. I try to invite him for any events/celebrations happening at my house. On the other hand, I seldom get to hang out with his family (much less to be invited to his family gatherings), I see them maybe around once/twice a year?

Somehow I used to think this situation would improve when we get married (since it’s legally into their family already?) but today I start to think it will continue to be status quo if I don’t sound it out. I don’t want to self invite to his family gatherings unless he really want me there. I mean even a casual lunch (where he will already be eating with his fam) also ok, don’t even need to be a celebration to be hanging out tgt.

Is it realistic that a married couple would be spending more time together with either families or do the individuals still go about to do their own things with their own families without inviting their partners along?

Here are what netizens think:

• You can ask him why he dont bring u along and if his parents asked about u why ure not there. Maybe theres a reason. Listen first, dont quarrel. Better get this off ur chest cuz sometimes it can be easily misunderstood.

• Next time you probably want more time away from both side of the families.

• Eh. Well. I would say my partner’s mom likes hosting (according to him) and my parents find it a “hassle” to have people over coz they feel they need to make the house presentable and need to behave in a certain way when guests are over. so y’know, I’ve definitely spent more time with his parents than he has mine.

• For after marriage, it depends on a lot of things I guess? If at least one person’s family “demands” to have dinner with their married child 3 times a week and the partner have other things to do, then it’s likely that the partner won’t show up for all the dinners. If it’s one a week or every 2 weeks, it makes sense that the couple joins the meals together.

People are just freaking weird and hard to please!

I admit that I am a negative person, not always and 100% negative but not bubbly and naively positive.

I don’t always give motivations but worst case scenarios. I sometimes forget to sugarcoat. So now, a few of my close ones are telling me that I should learn to be positive and always speak positive.

Fine, so I fake myself by hiding my worst honest opinions and only giving that few “socially correct” response with some of my not so pleasing opinions. I don’t just sugarcoat but drown them in sugar or silence.

They seems to love hate it. Often thinking I am not genuine and trying to brush them off. Hmm, how can I be genuine when I am not allow part of my opinions because they’re negative?

Sometimes I could feel they’re intentionally cutting me off when they THINK the conversation is going to turn negative. But fact is I am just sharing a video/article I saw.

I don’t know why communication have turn into something so tiring. It’s either they talk about the shit they care about and cut me when I tried to share what I care about OR I just listen but not actually listening to their boring stories because I know my opinions doesn’t matter. I don’t see the to and fro because it’s cut.

I have been thinking hard because this is happening with my family and a close friend. So is it really that I am so irksome when I talk?