Not because he’s pro life.

Not because he didn’t get consent.

Not because abused me in any way.

By all accounts he’s been nothing but kind, sweet and attentive. The reason I’m done is because despite knowing who I am he treated me as hysterical and ridiculous today.

It was a small disagreement and nothing consequential. The argument isn’t the problem. His response to it was.

This was a casual relationship on the face of it. I care for him, I’ve enjoyed my time with him, but my mom always told me those famous words from Maya Angelou: ‘when someone shows you who they are, believe them.’

She always emphasized the last part to me, ‘and believe them the first time.’ You know what? She’s right. This wasn’t a big argument. This wasn’t a big deal. But his response to something so small tells me everything I need to know.

I know who I am, I like who I am, and I worked hard to get that way. I don’t deserve to spend my time teaching someone how to show me and my feelings basic respect.

Maybe my standards are too high. Maybe I just don’t want to invest my energy wholly in a relationship. Maybe it’s a lot of things or none of them at all.

What I do know is that I love and respect myself enough not to let anyone make me question that

While scrolling through Tinder I found that my friend’s wife had made a profile which said she was looking for new friends. The photos were from her Facebook so nothing too provocative. What concerned me was the lack of any mention of her being married or having kids.

I screenshotted her profile, swiped left, and spent the next hour stressing out about whether I should tell my friend or not. In the end, I described what happened to him but in a hypothetical scenario involving another couple where I asked my friend if I should tell the husband about finding the wife’s dating profile.

My friend said yeah, I should tell the guy so I handed him my phone and showed him the screenshots of his own wife’s Tinder account. Predictably he was upset that even if she was just looking for friends that she hadn’t told him about the profile. So he leaves to go home and talk to her and I message his wife (who is also my friend) to let her know that her husband is going to be in a bad mood.

She asks why and I tell her about the Tinder account. That made her very upset with me as she explains that her friend made the account so the two of them could find other moms in the bigger city an hour away to hang out with and do group kid activities like going to the water park. She then informed me that the Tinder account was only an hour old when I found it and she hadn’t had a chance to tell her husband about it and implied that I might have ruined their marriage because I had made her husband irrationally angry and now she had to deal with that which would also make her late for work.

I felt like a huge AH as I’d apparently just ruined my best friend’s 10 yr marriage. So I apologized profusely to his wife for not talking to her first. A while later I called my friend and he sounded more sad than angry by this point. Apparently his wife was angry at him as well as me, though he said he didn’t understand why she was upset at him. (He didn’t elaborate so I don’t know how that conversation went.)

Now I’m wondering if I did the right thing, should have spoken with the wife first, or minded my own damn business. If her profile had said she was married and was looking for other moms to hang out with I’d have totally ignored it but it said “looking for new friends in.” And its hard to be comfortable with my friend’s wife saying that her friend made the account when that friend has been caught using social media to cheat on her husband more than once.

Though my friend’s wife has never cheated on him to either of our knowledge we both kinda feel like crap considering how upset she is over the whole thing. Am I the one at fault here?

My husband spent almost $500 on Onlyfans and custom content from random women.

I (f25) saw some questionable charges on my husbands (m29) credit card and when I asked him about it he pretended he had no idea what I was talking about and that it must be fraud.

Okay I won’t argue. He has a history of making impulsive purchase so I expected I would have to investigate myself.

I logged into his email and looked at the emails from the same day of the purchases and saw a bunch of PayPal transactions.

Long story short I was able to trace it to only fans subscriptions, custom content purchases and saw he was sending money to random women for god knows what.

In the span of a month and a half he’s spent almost $500 of OUR MONEY on this shit. My birthday was two weeks ago and he said he was low on money but would take me out next time he got paid.

Now I know why. I haven’t confronted him yet bc idk what to do. I feel completely disrespected, disappointed and angry and I know that I can’t talk to him right now when I’m so worked up.

Also I’ve been trying to be more adventurous sexually and feel like we’ve been great lately so this just feels like such a slap in the face and like I’ll never be enough.

I’m so angry and I have no one else to talk to about this bc it’s so embarrassing. I don’t know what my next step is going to be. I don’t deserve this.

An insurance agent recently shared a story about how he was able to retire young after selling multiple insurance policies to high net worth individuals.

He also shared how he did it.

Here is his story:

When I first started insurance, I was a bit sceptical. I was contemplating between being an insurance agent and being a property agent.

However, I passed my insurance exams first and got my license earlier.

I was a bit lost as most of my friends were people who drink day and night without any consideration to their futures.

I had to start somewhere, I joined my friends for a drink and did not expect much. Until one of my friends shared the medical bills his mother was facing as she was not insured and unfortunately lost her job after cancer strikes her.

So they started to talk about insurance policies and I happened to be selling. I managed to close several deals with my friends, including investments and medical. The best part I did not even have to push them.

So just a week after getting the policies, my friends asked me for a drink again but with a different clique.

It was a bunch of older guys that I had not met and most of them appear to be uncles who dress casually.

One of the uncles ask me what I was doing, I said: “I just started insurance recently and trying to work my way to afford a home in the near future.”

The uncle probed further and asked me about investment policies as he’s retired and do not want to waste so much time monitoring his investments.

I told him he can always start small and slowly work his way up.

I did not expect him to buy after a few beers and he told me to follow him after the drinking session ended.

He was wearing shorts, flip flops and an old T-shirt. But when we exit the pub, a Bentley was waiting for us outside and his chauffeur was there.

His driver took us to his house in Orchard and said that he felt that I was sincere and felt an affinity with me.

We continued drinking beer and he decided that he will buy a policy from me, I was thinking “It must be the beer talking”.

He contacted me the next day and he really did buy a policy from me that was in the 6 figure range.

We became friends and I started to mix with his friends who were of the same rich standing and it goes on and on.

Each of his friends bought multiple investment policies from me which range from 5 figures to 6 figures and all the policies from him and his friends totalled several millions.

The moral of the story is not just “don’t judge people by their covers” and also don’t ditch any activity just because it’s unhealthy.

From a glass of beer to riches. All the best to the people who are working out there.

Wife (31F) is conflicted on whether to let me (32M) or friend (31F) be in the delivery room

My wife is currently 5 months pregnant, so I know this is something we have time to discuss, but it’s still bothering me. This would be our first child so I’m trying not to stress her out, but I know I can’t let this just fester in me so I wanted to talk things out here and make sure I don’t say something stupid.

We talked a few days ago about what plans she wanted to do when it came to deliver, and she wanted to go to our nearby hospital where her OB practices and have her deliver. Made perfect sense, but her OB told her that the hospital is still using Covid restrictions and limiting her to have 1 support person in the room.

I figured she’d pick me, but instead she told me she was considering taking her best friend Ashley with her. For some backstory, while Ashley is her best friend, we’ve had a few discussions where I felt like she was prioritizing Ashley over me and how I felt like a 3rd wheel in our own relationship, especially early on. To my wife’s credit she’s gotten a lot better about this and improved her boundaries.

We talked about this and I asked why Ashley? She’s never had a kid so she doesn’t know what’s going on, and if my wife thinks Ashley is more supportive than I am, why did she even marry me? The other thing is that I’m a family physician, and part of my residency training included delivering babies, I delivered 15 during training so if anything, I’d be more helpful since she knows I’m not going to panic at seeing blood, and that I could understand what is going on.

Hell, I told her I’d be fine if she took her mother over either of us, at least her mom had 4 kids before so she definitely knows what’s going on, and we’ve never fought over her like we did Ashley.

She said that she doesn’t think either of us is more supportive, it’s just that she had promised Ashley when they were younger that they’d be in the delivery room for each other. That just confused me even more and I asked why did that matter over her own husband getting to be there and hold his child?

I asked her what it would be like if I was having an important surgery and told her to stay at home so I could bring someone else, and she said it was different and that she didn’t want to argue it anymore.

The problem is that now she says she’ll take some more time on who to take with her, and I feel like I’m forcing my wife to take me when ultimately, she’s the one undergoing the major procedure.

It’s like I’m trapped between a rock and a hard place. Either I go, and my wife resents me for making her break her promise, or I don’t go and then I resent my wife for not letting me be there. I know we need to talk through this, but I don’t want to keep hassling her and adding more stress to her pregnancy, anyone else been in a situation like this before?

Have i made a mistake by hanging up on my GF who’s on her period?

We were gaming while in call together. She kept being unnecessarily harsh and rude, telling me to stfu and just generally being really toxic towards me and the team. I kept walking on eggshells trying not to piss her off. Literally, everything I did/didn’t do pissed her off.

She then demanded I come over to pop pimples she can’t reach. I said no bc I hate popping pimples + you can’t just order people around like that. She scoffed and called me a crybaby. She knows that’s a sensitive insult bc my absent dad used to call me that whenever I told him my feelings. I hung up.

She’s on her period but I don’t know how forgiving I should be of this behaviour since it’s genuinely insulting and hurtful.

The hormones make it difficult to be calm, controlled and rational. You won’t understand unless you go through it yourself.

Nothing justifies bad behavior. With that in mind think about how much more difficult it is to be pleasant and civil when you are hungry, sick, or even just having a bad day.

So in another word she is weak minded?