A netizen shared about how she hates having intercourse with her boyfriend but that she has to pretend to like it.

Here is the story:

I love my boyfriend but our intercourse is awful and I pretend it’s great.

I love him in every way, except when we sleep together. It gets painful sometimes, and I hate doing it from the back (he loves it).

I tried to tell him once but he smiled at me genuinely and said

“I know you’re lying, you’re just upset with me at the moment “.

I was upset with him about something unrelated to it and this was when I chose to to tell him, about the awful experience.

I haven’t mentioned it since.

Netizens comments

To be fair, if a woman was told she is horrible at intercourse and dry as the desert, she would be insecure about it too.

The reality is, men do say this to women whether true or not. Usually because their private parts are small and they aren’t good

The partner is everything though. I like sleeping with my partner, I thought I’d be a little less addicted to it the older I get, but nope.

I have almost a bottomless pit of patience though. Nearly a year I went without it. with my ex, but conversations around it came out negatively.

Had a similar convo with my wife the other night and it was a beautiful and constructive conversation.

I was there for him through everything. I helped him financially. I helped him emotionally. I gave him advice and encouragement when he didn’t have it. I was there for him when he didn’t have anyone else in his life (that should have been a red flag).

My birthday is in a week and I wanted to spend it with him. I also was planning to buy him a huge teddy bear, his favorite candy and going out to dinner with him for our anniversary. But instead, I found out from his friend that numerous times after I left, he’d invite other girls AND SOMETIMES GUYS over and sleep with them. This explains why he asked me to help him move his bed from his wall that’s next to his roommates wall (she still ended up finding out and showing me evidence). He doesn’t care, has blamed me and said it’s my fault for volunteering do everything I did for him, and has blocked my number.

I accept my part in this. I gave him way too much soon and have to take full responsibility for it. But I still feel very hurt. And I still feel like a loser.

Here are what netizens think:

• It really isn’t your fault you got cheated on and taken advantage of. It sucks that you sound like such a sweet and giving person and it ended up wasted on some self-centered jerk. Him blaming you is a weak deflection.

• You aren’t a loser. You cared for someone who wasn’t what you thought he was. You learn from these experiences. Best wishes.

• You’re not a loser- a loser is a person who cheats on their partner. You gave what you wanted to give and what felt right for you to give in a relationship. Unfortunately he used you and has hurt you in doing so. The best thing you can do is block him and look after you. He took a lot from you and now it’s time to give it back to yourself. You deserved better. He is not better.

We are mid-40s and have been in committed r/s for 1 1/2 yrs. Both already have established careers, finances,

(1) kids from my previous marriage and him from a previous r/s. We’ve already planned to be together permanently and marriage has been a possibility. Over a few months last year, I sent him about a dozen pics and links to illustrate what I would like in an engagement ring if the time ever came.

I told him that I’d like a vintage pre-owned old mine cut diamond/sapphire bezel set ring (not a replica) because seeing the wear on the inner band makes me feel connected to history and like I’m carrying on the ring’s story through time.

The design goes with my personal style and the bezel setting goes well with the nature of my job. If we were going to get engaged, he knew how important the ring would be to me since I am a jewellery lover and put so much thought into every aspect of the ring I’d like, which I definitely let him know.

We went to Valentine’s Dinner a day early where I had a few too many martinis. He got on one knee in the restaurant and pulled out a brand new large oval-cut prong-set diamond ring and proposed. Its a beautiful ring but not even close to what I wanted. The night’s still fuzzy, but I didn’t react very well to the ring. Like, not at all.

He’s normally very sensitive to my likes and dislikes, but this time I felt like he didn’t listen or care at all about what I wanted. I admit, I acted ungratefully but I was hurt that he screw up such an important event that I had imagined so differently. When I said it wasn’t what I expected, he said he wanted me to be happy with it anyway because it’s the ring he picked out for me and wanted me to have. I’m the one who has to wear it every day for the rest of my life though and every time I look at it, it reminds me of how he totally ignored my feelings about such a significant event and significant item he expects me to wear daily.

This has erupted into a full-blown questioning of the entire relationship. He says I’m acting spoiled and ungrateful and he doesn’t trust me anymore because I have rejected the ring and he sees that as me rejecting him. He said I embarrassed him at the restaurant by acting pissed instead of excited. He spent more on this than I expected but I’d rather have a less expensive ring in the style I wanted instead of this.

He said he cannot get his money back from the jewellery store but that they said the centre stone (a totally different cut than I wanted) can be set in a different setting.

I’m still really bothered by this and as someone who’s survived an emotionally abusive upbringing as well as emotionally abusive long term relationships, I’ve finally gotten to a place to feel strong enough to stand up for myself and not to settle.

Should I just let it go or continue to make an issue out of it? Am I the red flag or is he?

I (28f) threw up all over my boyfriend’s (31m) floor. I got so sick and I couldn’t even make it to the bathroom.

I was laying on the bathroom floor afterwards and couldn’t move. He checked on me and cleaned it all up. At 2am.

Then he cuddled me to sleep. In the morning he made sure I drank plenty of water, gave me Advil and even made me breakfast while I showered.

I would also like to mention he JUST moved into this place and everything is shiny and new. And I threw up all over it. I was mortified.

Later that day I had to work late. He came to my place and washed my sheets for me so I’d have a comfy bed to sleep in, and he stayed with me to make sure I was okay.

I just… really want to show him how much it means to me. I’m making him dinner tomorrow night, but it doesn’t seem like enough. I love how kind he is. I hope I can be his wife someday.

Netizen’s comments

• Cooking a meal is a good idea. Give him food poisoning so that he throws up and you can return the favour.

• He seems like a very understanding and simplistic person. I think dinner and just saying thank you is plenty. Being kind is often an expression of love, Im sure he was more then happy to help you.

I just found out that my fiancée slept with my brother while we were on a break and I don’t know if I can forgive either of them.

My fiancée and I have been together for 7 years but took a break for a year when we were 22. We had a nasty argument and we ended up have a nasty break up. We stayed apart for a year and we dated other people, and grew as people within that year. We found each other again and fell back in love and have been together for 5 years. I proposed in December.

So recently I found this out from my younger brother. After our break up, she was so angry at me that literally a week after we separated she banged my older brother. I never found out, but she planned to tell me but I had deleted social media and blocked her on everything so she couldn’t t reach me.

I found out very recently as my older brother confided in my younger brother and my younger brother thought I should know before I get married to her. I confronted my fiancée about it and she admitted to it.

Now, I’m am upset about this, but I do not want to dump my fiancée. This was 5 years ago. We were both fresh out of college and were very different people than we are now in terms of maturity. She says she regrets doing that so much and I believe her.

Still I’m upset. I don’t know if I can forgive her for this. I don’t know if this is something I can ever forget. I also am way more angry at my brother than her. He knew we had a nasty break up. He knew she was trying to get back at me for dumping her. He knew this would hurt me, and he didn’t care. He even kept it secret after we met again.

I’m so mad at both of them. This may be some thing I hold on to for years. I don’t know how I could just erase this. Honestly I wish I hadn’t found out.

I just needed to ask this here because it has frankly never happened to me before.

I have a crush on a coursemate. He knows I like him because I’ve talked about it and some of his friends have heard it and then told him. So he knows. However, he doesn’t feel the same. We’ve been chatting regularly for 8 months and he has never expressed interest in me in any way. I also know from a mutual friend of ours that he talks to several girls (he has never mentioned any of them to me when I ask him how his dating life is going, in fact he never talks about his dating life with me for some weird reason).

Now, I find it super odd given the fact he knows I like him, he doesn’t feel the same, that he continues interacting with me and initiating contact. He isn’t initiating hang outs and we don’t hang out at school (we barely speak in class) but he will send me stuff on Snapchat, ask questions and initiate conversations. He will watch tv shows and play games that he knows I watch/play, and often base conversations around it. He will also send stuff on snap late night when he is out drinking/doing stuff.

I’m not super experienced, but most guys will freak out if you tell them you like them romantically (as in have feelings) and they don’t feel the same. They won’t contact you at all and they definitely won’t be hanging around you. Or have I misunderstood something? Because this is how I feel when someone has a crush on me and I don’t feel the same. I feel like I have to distance myself for a while, and I definitely won’t be initiating any conversations so that I don’t give the wrong impression that there is a chance of romance.

Why is he still interacting with me despite not being into me and knowing I’m into him romantically? Is this indicate of something weird that gives off red flags?

A couple of hours ago, I had to attend a mandatory google meet for an after-school club. It’s important to note that I have rather severe social anxiety, and I do not like talking during these meets or in any way drawing attention to myself.

Unfortunately, questions were being asked, and everyone had to respond. Even worse, my mic suddenly decided to stop working. There was an awkward silence as people waited for me to answer the question and I frantically typed out my answer and excuse for not being able to speak. Crisis averted.

To avoid this from happening again, I typed out the rest of my answers in advance. However, unlike when typing in a google doc, pressing enter sends what you wrote. It does not go down to the next line. Cue another panic as I realized I interrupted someone with an answer to a question I had not yet been asked.

I quickly apologized and, in an anxiety-fueled rage, moaned in frustration.

Boom. Mic turns on.

Someone briefly informed me that my mic seems to have started working. I chose to ignore them, and instead stared at my computer screen in horror for the next couple of minutes.

The next time it was my turn to speak (about 15min later), I casually mentioned that I figured out the problem, and proceeded as if nothing has happened.

I do not know how many people noticed, nor do I know why my mic stopped and then suddenly started working. All I know is that this will haunt me for the rest of days.

How can an ugly person cope with loneliness?

I realised that even if one day I become rich or something there still won’t be anyone that love me for me. And even though I have an extrovert personality, treat everyone nicely and never said no to anyone asking for help, I still have no friends, let alone romantic encounters.

I become super depressed and angry every time I see people posting their holidays, they’re couple pictures and friendship gatherings. After inspecting every aspect of my life the only reason I could blame is that I am ugly, even if I try my best to dress properly.

What should I do? I really can’t handle this anymore. (Therapist just say it’s fine everyone is lonely, stop looking at social media, useless!)

Here are what netizens think:

• work on yourself , if wearing nice clothes makes you feel good, do it if getting yourself physically more attractive..do it… you must first make yourself Confident so people can feel your confidence in you. Although look is first stage of approach its the inner self that will eventually attract. As fir social media just take with a pinch of salt,no one will show you their plight. Go work on yourself alot like how you would work on a garden and one day all the bees will come to you.

• My friends asked me whether I am a Lesbian, i was shocked, she said you are not bad looking, funny and nice to chit chat why still single? I am not against anybody sex preferences, it is their life they can do whatever they want. for me, i enjoy being single or rather alone, when i mixed with people, laugh, chit chats, etc, i find that it is draining. I enjoy life alone, thinking and talking to myself internally and do stuff that i like and that is life for me.

• Sometimes people who post the most, have the most problems. Don’t believe everything you see on the internet. Some couples who post the most actually have the most problems in their relationship. I know a couple who kept posting how much they love each other when the husband cheated and everyone knew. Only insecure people will keep seeking validation online.

• And holiday photos? Some people who don’t have a lot will keep flaunting. Happy and healthy people will not waste time on social media because they are busy enjoying life.

• Being single and lonely is not unattractive. What is more unattractive is your anger. So find a way to channel that anger into something positive. Go gym, find an exercise routine and sweat your heart out. Eat better too. Not only will you look better, it will improve your mental health which will make you feel loads better.

My husband pleasures himself with my teenage photos, what should I do?

I’m 25 years old, my husband is 27. We have been in relationship for 4 years and in marriage for 1 year. Overall we are happily married, both of us have ok career and my husband has been taking good care of me.

Around my late puberty years, when I was 14-15 years old, I was curious about myself, and also a bit naughty, so I took some inappropriate selfies. I never shared them with anyone, just kept them in an old thumb drive, together with other old photos. Overtime, I forgot about their existences.

Last week, I caught my husband pleasuring himself (he often does it when I don’t have the mood for S), and shockingly, using those photos of mine as materials. Apparently, he found those photos when cleaning up old thumb drives. I was furious, not just because of shame, but also because those are underage materials.

My husband’s defending arguments were that: 1. He didn’t cheat on me or fantasized about other girls, because those are photos of me. 2. The girl in the photo, at this very moment, is of legal age, and is his legal wife, so the thing he did was not morally wrong.

Though my husband has been trying to make-up with me, we still haven’t talked again since then. I still feel uncomfortable whenever I think about it. What should I do? Should I just delete those pictures and try to forget about this event? I don’t want to file for divorce, because I still love him, and he has been a really good husband to me.